stumbling all over words

[shoe]

I have this problem so often when I'm trying to hold a conversation with someone, or even just to answer people at work. I start saying things and either the words come out wrong, or come out in the wrong order, or I'll say something completely unrelated to what I want to say. lol.. its like my mind and my mouth aren't communicating correctly. Sometimes new words will even come out because somehow a few words get compressed together on their way from my thoughts to my mouth. :P

I know I sound like an idiot when I do that but Im pretty sure its all about anxiety and impatience - impatience related to wanting to get the darn conversation over and escape the source of my anxiety!

any others that do the same thing?

[kaileen]

i dont have social phobia but i do stumble a bit on words, i think everyone does a little. when i find myself stubmling i try to take a breath and slow myself down and work through it slower.

[duddits]

Shoey, if a real good looking woman thanks me for helping them with something, I'll say "ok" 3 seconds later. I fully mean to say "you're welcome", but it's almost like my mind freezes. I think its the fact that I don't expect a hot woman to say anything to me at all; when I do answer it just comes out all messed up. Other situations where I just stumble over my words are when Im talking to people in authority trying to explain something.

Most of the time what will is that I'll talk so fast beacuse im anxious, then im just fall backward on my words, where what I said made no sense at all to the person im talking to. :?

[desperateDave]

i did this all the time in front of people at the store, especially with my exboss looking over my shoulder or if other customers were there. i would sometimes become too panicked and would have to walk away. I sometimes couldnt even get out a "back in a moment", i would just become a blubbering fool and try to escape as fast as i could. :(

[Miranda]

Hey guys, I can relate. I often find myself thinking something in my head to say, and when it comes out, it sounds totally different from what I wanted with the tone and choice of words I use. I usually don't explain myself well at all because I try to get my point across as quickly and with the least amount of words possible. Then I excuse myself by explaining that I'm just not good with words and expressing my thoughts, which is true but now I know that it's caused from Social Anxiety.

[shoe]

Miranda, you seem to do quite well at using words and expressing your thoughts online at least ;)

Sometimes for me, my mind feels so random, the thoughts sometimes are just all jumbled together and I want to try and organize them before they come out, but the flood of ideas just confuses me and I blurt out nonsense.

I love computers and chat and message boards for the fact I'm able to concentrate and focus a little better, and I can actually 'see' my ideas and thoughts and how they may seem random or not. I can then go back and edit what I want to say and make it make more sense.

Sometimes too, what comes out of my mouth makes the conversation go down a path I hadn't really intended, but I try to 'ride the wave' so to speak and continue on that conversational path so that it seems like I really had a purpose for saying what I did. lol I guess I'd be way too embarassed to say 'no, thats not what I meant to say'. oh well :?

[Fear]

hey,shoe,maybe your mind just work too fast :)

[shoe]

hehe, thats for sure. Alot of things going on up there all the time, I need some peace of mind hehe. maybe I need to meditate some to gain better mental focus? hmm..

[Fear]

Yeah,just practice yoga,with Madonna it works,haha

[shoe]

lol, well I don't know about Madonna.. =P

Meditation tho isn't such a bad idea, but it feels kinda odd just spending time doing nothing... I'd probably fall asleep if I tried hehe

[Fear]

Better,you won't have to think at all!

[brickyard_red]

I do the same thing shoe. When I'm talking to someone my mind is thinking of what it wants to say, but I don't think my mouth can keep up. I will jumble my words all up. Like one time I was telling someone a story of a movie I had watched and I was to the part where in the movie people were in a crowd and clapping for someone. Well, when I said it, it came out as, "and the clouds were crapping". I am always doing that. Taking a letter or two from one word and a letter or two from another word and mixing them up so that it comes out sounding totally absurd!

Or I won't be able to think of anything to say at all because when the time comes that it's my turn to talk in a conversation my mind will just go blank. Nothing will be there for me to say and I panic trying to come up with something, ANYTHING at this point and that always ends up in a bad way. :oops:

Which is why it's easier for me to just stand around and listen to people talk than it is for me to actually talk myself. I don't talk so much that people of actually taken to telling me that I talk to much trying to make a joke out of it. :? I suppose that is better than having them laugh in my face or be mean.

Cath

[shoe]

Cath, good to know I'm not alone! I have learned to keep my trap shut for fear of embarassment of those types of things. lol, clouds were crapping.. thats funny..

anyway, I know I need more practice talking, and to try and work through things slower with more focus before speaking.. but with anxiety, calm rational thinking doesn't come easy!

[brickyard_red]

No, shoe, rational calm thinking does not come easily! Amen to that!!
I have to say that I am so excited and happy to have found this forum. It's nice to know that there is somewhere I can come to when I am having a bad day or something just happened that has me flustered or I just need to go somewhere where I know I'm understood for who I am and what I deal with. My husband is very understanding, or tries to be, but I know that he gets frustrated with me and my anxiety and phobias. It's nice to have a place to come to and know that I'm not going to be looked at as a freak or a physco. lol :D

Cath