Why do people think angoraphobia is a choice?

[joshesmama]

I have had psychiatrists to tell me to stop being so anxious. That is stupid. People do not choose to have anxiety. That is like telling someone who has depression to snap out of it. Or, like telling a scizophrenic to stop hallucinating. It is not like a choice.

I even had doctors who refused to treat me because they thought I was seeking "drugs". People with anxiety need anti-anxiety medicine, not an antipsychotic or an antidepressant. The only medine that helps me is anti-anxiety medicine. Why do doctors rufuse to treat this disorder?

[atomic811]

because the sad fact is many doctors do not know what they are doing, they also many times do not even understand the medication they are handing out. They have no knowledge of the horrible withdrawal people can go through even if tappered off by them.

I also find that they do not have a clue many times about how anxiety work. I have anxiety all the time for no reason 24/7 it is not that I am always "scared" of something. I just live in a low state of anxiety and when it flares up I am not able to cope (it flares when I am upset about something).

I am not able to take medication for this and the rest of the world looks at me and says "oh you have anxiety...do you take medication?" like there is a "cure" as if medication just heals it up like an antibiotic would a sore throat caused by a bacteria.

[edwardme]

Hey joshesmama,

I know what you mean! At my last visit to my doctor, he told me that I was an adult and that meant acting like one, which meant that I should go outside and into groups of people in malls at busy times (like after work, lunch time and coffee breaks), and this would cure me by making me behave like an adult.

There is a seminar conducted by the Manitoba Schizophrenic Society where you wear a Walkman with headphone and voices 'talk to you' at different intervals, while you are doing different tasks, like going outside and asking for directions, and attending a mock job interview etc.. Apparently it is HIGHLY effective in mimicking schizophrenia, and all the psychiatric nurses, and EMT/police/social workers graduating from university in Winnipeg have to attend and pass as part of their courses. Most can't finish it because it is too disturbing for them, and they go away with a whole new insight into what it's like to be a person living with this mental illness.

We need something like this for panic and anxiety, that our primary health care professionals are required to attend and pass before being able to work with patients.

I'm not holding my breath, though.

[TiaLimaria]

Wow, Edward, that's really interesting. I too feel there should be something similar for anxiety issues.

[dtrotter]

Well, Edward, it's really interesting to know that psychiatrist do that as welll. Unfortunately, too many money-minded psychiatrist are around.

[Oona]

To look at this in a more positive light, I think they somehow THINK they can make you 'snap' out of it. Of course it's impossible to understand what someone is going through unless you experience it yourself also. It's like telling a depressed person to "cheer up." Doesn't work that way.

[andrila]

Anxiety is problem which can not be solved by medicine or by using any kind of pills what I think so.

I'll just suggest you in a line to perform normal exercise daily in morning time which will definitely makes you feeling fresh whole day without being tensed 8)

[rmartin345]

Agoraphobia can often lead to a change in behaviour where a person with the condition will avoid situations that may cause them anxiety.It is very complicated because everyone is different but the main thing is people do manage it and often you can get dark thoughts with anxiety which can be disturbing but if you ignore the urges to obsess over them the panic does eventually subside.The side effects these medications cause appear to be particularly strong and negative for people with anxiety disorders.

[Joeyward]

a lot of doctors are not very good at treating anxiety. However, zoloft has been a boon in my life. I cringe when I think of how messed up I was off it. I understand that benzo may seem like the best treatment, and they can be, however the rebound anxiety and depression I get from them is horrible. I even crashed a car while taking them. There are ways to manage it and ssri's can work.

[lunalady]

Hi joshesmama,

For being so educated, doctors can be really really dumb sometimes. I have had doctors treat me like I was just looking for drugs too.

I don't know why people think anxiety is a choice. I wouldn't choose this for anything.

I think in my life, people have often thought I was being overly dramatic. Other people thought I was stuck up- it was social anxiety- I was unable to speak.

Anyhow, good post, and the replies are all interesting too.

[lunalady]

We need something like this for panic and anxiety, that our primary health care professionals are required to attend and pass before being able to work with patients.

I'm not holding my breath, though.

Wouldn't that be great?? I'm not holding my breath either...

[mamascrazy1985]

most doctors PRACTICE medications as well as treatment. what meds are your doctor trying to give you? You are right about not being able to stop being anxious but there are ways to prevent or lessen it. meditation is one. breathing techniques is another. therapy is another. you dont REALLY need medication. you can over come it without but it takes a long time. i have had anxiety and panic disorder for about 3 years and i refuse medication or driving. and a long list of other crazy things too but i have never been on something for it. i just started therapy and am working through a book called" the anxiety and panic workbook". you can find this on amazon and i have found it helpful. maybe you can too. therapy works just be patient there is no quick fix. hope alls well

[racheladele234]

It angers me so much to hear that anxiety sufferers get treated this way. I have had it first hand also, when in 1st year at university I began to feel extremely anxious and i couldn;t study as a result. So i went to the uni doctor and he just said stop making excuses for extensions and get on with your work. A year later i never went back and am still suffering :(

[DaneV]

Well if by anti-anxiety medications you mean tranquilizers I do understand why your doctor doesn`t want to prescribe them. These drugs do help you in the short term, but after a short while you will become tolerant to them, meaning you will need more and more to get the same effect. They are very addictive and coming off them is like hard drug withdrawal for some people. Doctors will get in trouble if they prescribe these drugs to often, because they are "tracked" in many countries.

Anti-depressants could be a good idea along with coping strategies (not as a mono therapy!) as they not only lift your mood, but can also take the edge of your anxiety so you can start working on yourself. One day you will want to come off these anti-depressants as well, and you`ll probably also get withdrawal symptoms, but they aren`t comparable to detoxing from benzo`s.

The fact that they are telling you that you should just stop being anxious is ridiculous though...

[dd2283]

i thought it was just my doctor who was like this, no matter what is wrong with me he tells me its a symptom of anxiety and wont give me anything for it, that it will go away when the anxiety calms down, i get very bad bouts of exzema and he wont do anything for me, then if i beg him enough he might give me a cream for it. yet he referrs other people with exzema to skin specialists. at this stage i think if i went to him and my arm fell off he would say it was anxiety lol.

[Gladys]

I think medical professionals make some really rash judgements, never realising that what they say can be with a person forever. So if what they say isn't in any way constructive, it only serves to make the person they're seeing feel more marginalised.
Why can't they see that avoiding situations is a coping strategy like any other. If there are other, better coping strategies, it's their job to point us in the right direction.

[texzen123]

Dude-a-roo, you haven't taken Xanax.... My panic attacks laugh and flip off my "deep breathing", "positive affirmations" and any cognative behavior BS I can chunk at it... but when I threaten it with Xanax or Klonopin, it runs like step child... so yes... pills do help..ALOT

[Schatmeisje]

This makes me so angry, so many people seem to have this attitude that we just dont 'want' to do things or go out. It is a very small minded approach to supporting us and makes us feel even worse. I know myself, I hate living in my bedroom, and my mum has said to me once 'you would feel so much better if you got out more'. yes, of course i would, but thats the whole point, im too afraid to go out and i can not physically do it. I have slowly got rid of everyone who is not supportive out of my life and i am concentrating on the ones that are positive and helpful and keep going through each and every day, bit by bit, making a very very slow progress to recovery.

[fallingthin]

Because those people cannot relate. The only reason, they can see, that you are doing what you are doing is because you must be looking for attention or drugs.

[fallingthin]

If they could walk not even a day but a few moments in your shoes they would understand.

[inescapable]

This is my first time to this forum and the first thread I read. I am in shock the similaries to my life. Tears poured down my face as I read. I often feal alone in this world. I'm convinced no one understands what its like being me, well other than most of you guys. I just wish I had a close friend that understood. I'm exhausted from meds and therapy that hasn't helped. Although if I didn't have my celexa, abilify, xanax and adivan I would have given up on life. Thank you to all of you for getting me, for what feels like a first. You'd think the doctors would have at least fraction of this insight ;(

[caera]

I want to highlight the disorder first. Agoraphobia is an anxiety disorder. In this, people have panic attacks or symptoms like this. The result of this disease is people, who are suffering from this disorder avoid public. EMDR is a possible treatment for agoraphobia.

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Nursing Homes

[Schatmeisje]

what is EMDR?

[caera]

Hi Schatmeisje,
EMDR is eye movement desensitization and reprocessing. This therapy involves recalling a stressful past event and reprogramming the memory in the light of positive, self chosen belief. This therapy consist some phases by them therapist can understand what is the level of your problem.
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Nursing Homes

[Rosie Walters]

what is EMDR?

EMDR is like tearing a scab off a wound then grinding salt in it. I did it with my therapist twice and just can't do it anymore. It is supposed to work really well for people with PTSD which was my original diagnosis and I have to say it worked for a short time but then I started having awful anxiety issues which progressed into agoraphobia.

[JessicaK]

From working in the mental health field and being an anxiety sufferer myself, I can't even begin to describe the disconnect between medical practice and mental health. Medical doctors are not particularly trained in diagnosing and treating mental illnesses (unless you're a psychiatrist). It is frightening how little they actually know. I never recommend going to a medical doctor for anything mental health related. They are very quick to throw pills at you, and often times they end up not being the best medication for the patient. Always see a psychiatrist when dealing with medication if you can afford it.

[omnicell]

Dr are not trained in Psych stuff. I had a doctor 10 years ago look at me and say nothing was wrong. He was 100% wrong. He's not used to dealing with Psych stuff.

[Foamy]

Hi Schatmeisje,
EMDR is eye movement desensitization and reprocessing. This therapy involves recalling a stressful past event and reprogramming the memory in the light of positive, self chosen belief. This therapy consist some phases by them therapist can understand what is the level of your problem.
____________
Nursing Homes
That sounds downright horrible.
"programming" is something abusers use to hold or control people.

However, I noticed a typo in the post title
www bumblebeeacres com /images/princey2.jpg
Angoras are actually quite cute :P

[Buttercup]

Unfortunately doctors can be rather insensitive when it comes to anxiety, on the other hand some can be incredibly helpful so if your doc falls into the insensitive/ignorant category then see a different doctor.

I have suffered periods of agorophobia in the past and at times it has lasted for several weeks to months. I disagree with people that say it is a choice to be like that but I also think that it is a choice to get better. It is incredibly difficult to work on getting help and improving especially if you are house bound but the only way to do it is to work hard, kick yourself up the backside and fight with all you have to get out there and well again. It takes guts and a lot of effort but it is possible to get over it eventually and to be honest with you it is a choice to be house bound/agorophobic in that you are choosing to let the symptoms overwhelm you so much that you choose to avoid everything and anything that may trigger them. The symptoms are very real but, as I said, it's a choice regarding how you deal with them.

[Matt C]

Anyone who hasn't experienced this would find it very hard to empathize and understand what it's like. Like I've said before in another post... many people (including family) used to just jakingly label me as an 'airhead', and 'nuts', and their best advice they could think of was to tell me to 'stop thinking so much', or to just be with it and you'll 'come out the other side'... and the thing is my family are actually some of the nicest people I've met, so it just goes to show how hard it is for most to 'get it'

Buttercup... What you were saying about getting 'out there'... that's my experience too. But I needed to use tools to help take the edge off of it. The Panic Disorder crossed with daylight spontaneous hallucinations (Psychosis) was just too much to handle without using some tools to help me through.

Personally I found that using a tool like Mantra helped me to deal with the panic I had whilst in public, this gave me just enough of the edge off of it to put myself out there in public despite the anxiety. I would be around people until I couldn't bare it... and then disappear off to the loo or something, do some more meditation for a 2-3 mins, and then get back out there.

I also found a morning ritual of meditation followed by gratitude, and visualising myself as I wanted to be in those situations helped train my mind to let go of that habit of anxiety too. :)

There's lots more I did, but I think these are core things. I found using breath and body awareness including using Taiji, and Toaist Yoga invaluable for helping me to not take the thoughts and feelings flowing through too seriously. Basically I had to learn how to first transcend it... and in the end I was laughing at the thoughts and feelings because when I looked at it all impersonally for long enough, I could see how ridiculous the thoughts were.

Scary when you attach to them though!

Isn't it amazing how our minds work?

Still leaves me with a sense of wonder... most of us really don't know how powerful our minds are. But I feel coming through this is one of the single most important turning points in my life.

I'm now happier. more peaceful, and confident than I ever was before having gone through this. I wish the same for all of you. x

[Matt C]

|I'm just glad you all had the good sense to reach out.

I did but in a different way, I looked everywhere for things to try, and stuck with Meditation techniques that worked for me, and the Taiji... cos it helped!! But I think if I had come to this forum then I sure as heck wouldn't have felt as alone as I did at the time.

Sometimes knowing you're not alone in what you're going through can help to take away the fear that it's a rare and insurmountable challenge... however, nothing replaces good old fashioned positive action and rituals.

Much love to you all.

[Buttercup]

Buttercup... What you were saying about getting 'out there'... that's my experience too. But I needed to use tools to help take the edge off of it. The Panic Disorder crossed with daylight spontaneous hallucinations (Psychosis) was just too much to handle without using some tools to help me through.



I totally agree that in order to get out there you need tools. I couldn't have done it without the help of a therapist, meds, friends and family. It's hard sometimes though to put what you have learned into practice and to push yourself to do things that were so awful before. I feel like I had to re-train my brain in order to make progress but I could not have done that alone.

[Matt C]

I feel like I had to re-train my brain in order to make progress but I could not have done that alone.

I reckon you would be about right there haha. I think we all have to learn a new way of relating to our thoughts and feelings to go beyond this... and of looking after ourselves, and therefore others. It really is like I say one of the most valuable learning experiences I've ever had. :)

[teajay]

Retraining the brain ... a challenge but I think that's really important. I have had a lot of therapy to change my negative thinking.... It helps I tend to stop trying and so I start over again. I am telling my anxiety and thoughts to go away...saying things outloud.... it"s fun actually.
... I swear and yell and say things I've never had the nerve to a person who annoys me or frightens me.... I would have my son when he was young to tell off scarry dreams or imagined monsters.... It helps.... not practical in certain situations.... although I've cracked up some friends by opening a door and kicked at nothing... someone asks what the heck? I've told them that I'm drop kicking some fears so I can enjoy myself....

[ananxiousgirl]

Not a choice of course....

[bpage]

i thought it was just my doctor who was like this, no matter what is wrong with me he tells me its a symptom of anxiety and wont give me anything for it, that it will go away when the anxiety calms down, i get very bad bouts of exzema and he wont do anything for me, then if i beg him enough he might give me a cream for it. yet he referrs other people with exzema to skin specialists. at this stage i think if i went to him and my arm fell off he would say it was anxiety lol.

If I were you, I would re-think the doctor you are going to. Maybe try finding someone else. He doesn't seem very helpful at s. :-(

[alankay]

If you are in the UK thank Dr. Heather Ashton who took the worst cases of benzo over prescription by well meaning docs and resulting dependency cases and made herself a minor celebrity. She has villanized benzos in the UK and Dr's are scared to rx them. A pity for all those who suffer there. Sure they need to be rx'ed like other meds(properly with some discipline/restraint) but what's worse living with disabling anxiety or a therapeutic "semi" dependence(at worst) on benzos to live a much more normal life . All monitored via a relationship with your doctor. If you are in the UK try visiting France or some other countries on the Continent as they have a much more pragmatic and reasonable approach to rx'ing benzos properly. You will have to learn to us them with some discretion and restaint. Any if no luck at home ask about atarax(an old antihistamine with good anti-anxiety effects). I bet you can get a trial of that easier as it has little/no abuse potential. You might also ask about lyrica. Alankay.

[streakybacon]

I hear ya man the benzo situation over here is a joke

[JennaHaagen]

Hi,

My name is Jenna Haagen and I'm currently a freshman at Arizona State University. For my English assignment, I chose to research about Agoraphobia and Panic Disorder. I have done some research, but one of the requirements is a primary source. So, I was hoping I could find someone to interview over Skype. If you are interested, please respond and we'll work out a way to get in touch. Thank you so much!

[yellowrose]

#11




yellowrose


Junior Member
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1






Does anyone else ever get struck by thoughts that they can't trust humans. That all people are possessed by the devil and are not what they appear to be. This is my obsessional fear but I never ever come across anyone else who experiences such thoughts. Am I completely crazy???????????? When with other people I often involuntarily imagine what is within a person's head and body and imagine all kinds of weird black images that upset me and cause panic attacks. Can anyone else relate to this????????????????????????????????????

[kelliesean]

#11

yellowrose

Junior Member
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1

Does anyone else ever get struck by thoughts that they can't trust humans. That all people are possessed by the devil and are not what they appear to be. This is my obsessional fear but I never ever come across anyone else who experiences such thoughts. Am I completely crazy???????????? When with other people I often involuntarily imagine what is within a person's head and body and imagine all kinds of weird black images that upset me and cause panic attacks. Can anyone else relate to this????????????????????????????????????

I can't say that I have had these kinds of thoughts.. But I can tell u that I have had such irrational thoughts/obsessions and anxieties, that your obsessions do not surprise or shock me at all. You sound to be right on point for OCD and anxiety lol
And as the saying goes "crazy people don't know that they are crazy" (that sometimes helps to calm me when I believe I am going off the deep end)
Your obsessive thoughts are intrusive and disturbing.. As they are under these circumstances.. Just as with the stories of loving OCD moms who are horrified that they can't stop thinking about the idea tht they might stab their kids ..
If you aren't seeig a psychologist I wd right away.. Get on a great med (I like Zoloft) and it is AMAZING the relief you will feel w in a few months :)

[em1]

This is just whats made mine so bad,I have fears of hurting my kids and getting put in prison,I thought I was going crazy and it's making me so ill,I adore my baby's they are my whole world and back,I used fear I would die now I wish I had that fear back as this is the most hurtful thing ever,I would die for my kids if it comes to me or them it would be me everytime x

[kelliesean]

I hear ya em1.., I just had a completely overwhelming feeling that I would leave my kids, the other day! But I wd never! So sad the games our minds play on us! Grrr
But I have found such relief being on Zoloft in the past! So I am 3 weeks back on and hoping for the best!!! Are u on meds?

[em1]

I hear ya em1.., I just had a completely overwhelming feeling that I would leave my kids, the other day! But I wd never! So sad the games our minds play on us! Grrr
But I have found such relief being on Zoloft in the past! So I am 3 weeks back on and hoping for the best!!! Are u on meds?

Yes I'm on the same as you but only a week in to mine,oh I know it scares the hell out of you

[kelliesean]

Sorry if I am a little "off" w following the threads lol. I think u just said before you were now newly on meds.. I'm kinda new here and still trying to Learn how it all goes :)

[em1]

Sorry if I am a little "off" w following the threads lol. I think u just said before you were now newly on meds.. I'm kinda new here and still trying to Learn how it all goes :)

Lol that's ok,I'm new here to,I've never been on anything be4 so this is my first time on any Medication

[calimel]

I have gone through periods of time where my anxiety is under control, and I do well talking myself through things. I have talked myself through bouts of not wanting to leave my house my making myself leave every day for trivial things, little errands. But I have also gone through times when I can't do it on my own without medical help. I have learned to recognize the difference. When I start having the full blown panic attacks, talking myself through it with breathing, blah blah, is a no go. But there are times that just knowing I have the Xanax if I need it is enough for me to be able to get through without taking it. mentally i need to know that bottle is there to even have a prayer of short circuiting that full blown attack. Don't know if that makes sense.

[Yrrep Celly]

This is the first thread I've looked at on this board, and I want to thank everyone who has posted. I came to this board originally because my aunt sent me this angry email about how I need to just "get over it" and "go do something useful with myself". She definitely thinks it's a choice, and that I just want to be lazy. I wish I could just send her this link...

[calimel]

I think the " just get over it" response is fairly common with people who have never experienced full blown panic/anxiety/agoraphobia. They just can't really understand.

[kelliesean]

I think the " just get over it" response is fairly common with people who have never experienced full blown panic/anxiety/agoraphobia. They just can't really understand.

Yes.. So so true..

[Applecherry]

Well anxiety is not a choice, but choosing to stay housebound is.. One thing to NEVER do when you become afraid of having a panic attack is to avoid going somewhere because of it.. Do not feed the anxiety, go about your life as normal. I know it's not easy, but trust me, it feels so much worse knowing you gave into anxiety than having fought it. You may not feel better right away, but you will be happy that you have continued your routine as normal because people with really bad depression have to stick to a routine, and not let themselves drift off into doing nothing but staying in bed all day, and feeling miserable.

Right now, I'm going through depression period, not a whole lot to do with my day, I'm feeling pretty isolated socially too. but I make it a habit to go on a walk everyday, even if it's a 15 minute one, I go up several hills, it's not fun and somedays I really don't wanna do it cause I feel like I will be hit with another panic attack (and sometimes I am), but I still do it, cause I just feel worse when I don't. Exercise is great for relieving tension, it really is.

What I feel about PTSD therapy where you "relive" a panic is kind of useless.. because anxiety is a state, it can't be reasoned with.. or even desensitized.. When you are not anxious, it's not there, it only exists within the state. People who have ongoing PTSD flare-ups still have it because they are unhappy with life (at the moment).. Wounds like this heal when you find peace again in your existence.

and I do take medication, I have been taking it for over a year now. When I first started taking it, it took 6 weeks to feel it's affects, and after that, I felt pretty good, I felt like the medication was protecting me from ever having another anxiety attack again. I was happy for 4 months, til one day, I was hit with a really bad, full blown panic attack again, this was due to stress over a break up.. and since, I have been anxious and depressed again. I lost faith in my medication "protecting" me from having furthur attacks.

but after that relapse of anxiety again, I realize the anxiety medication can only help me half way, it can relieve some anxiety symptoms but not rid of the anxiety altogether, cause nothing will magically make the anxiety go away til I fix certain problems. I can manage my anxiety a little better these days, but it's been really tough. :(

[epollock]

I have had psychiatrists to tell me to stop being so anxious. That is stupid. People do not choose to have anxiety. That is like telling someone who has depression to snap out of it. Or, like telling a scizophrenic to stop hallucinating. It is not like a choice.

I even had doctors who refused to treat me because they thought I was seeking "drugs". People with anxiety need anti-anxiety medicine, not an antipsychotic or an antidepressant. The only medine that helps me is anti-anxiety medicine. Why do doctors rufuse to treat this disorder?

It took me forever to find a doc that would take me seriously - - I found him in an E.R. - - just a regular E.R. physician who recognized my symptoms because he had them once upon a time himself.
I guess thats the point - - until someone goes through it, they will never fully understand.

[epollock]

Well anxiety is not a choice, but choosing to stay housebound is.. One thing to NEVER do when you become afraid of having a panic attack is to avoid going somewhere because of it.. Do not feed the anxiety, go about your life as normal. I know it's not easy, but trust me, it feels so much worse knowing you gave into anxiety than having fought it. You may not feel better right away, but you will be happy that you have continued your routine as normal because people with really bad depression have to stick to a routine, and not let themselves drift off into doing nothing but staying in bed all day, and feeling miserable.

Right now, I'm going through depression period, not a whole lot to do with my day, I'm feeling pretty isolated socially too. but I make it a habit to go on a walk everyday, even if it's a 15 minute one, I go up several hills, it's not fun and somedays I really don't wanna do it cause I feel like I will be hit with another panic attack (and sometimes I am), but I still do it, cause I just feel worse when I don't. Exercise is great for relieving tension, it really is.

What I feel about PTSD therapy where you "relive" a panic is kind of useless.. because anxiety is a state, it can't be reasoned with.. or even desensitized.. When you are not anxious, it's not there, it only exists within the state. People who have ongoing PTSD flare-ups still have it because they are unhappy with life (at the moment).. Wounds like this heal when you find peace again in your existence.

and I do take medication, I have been taking it for over a year now. When I first started taking it, it took 6 weeks to feel it's affects, and after that, I felt pretty good, I felt like the medication was protecting me from ever having another anxiety attack again. I was happy for 4 months, til one day, I was hit with a really bad, full blown panic attack again, this was due to stress over a break up.. and since, I have been anxious and depressed again. I lost faith in my medication "protecting" me from having furthur attacks.

but after that relapse of anxiety again, I realize the anxiety medication can only help me half way, it can relieve some anxiety symptoms but not rid of the anxiety altogether, cause nothing will magically make the anxiety go away til I fix certain problems. I can manage my anxiety a little better these days, but it's been really tough. :(

If I may (respectfully) comment on this one statement you made: "People who have ongoing PTSD flare-ups still have it because they are unhappy with life (at the moment).. Wounds like this heal when you find peace again in your existence." - - youre very wrong. I have PTSD. Its caused my trauma. Just because I have suffered this trauma in my life, doesnt mean I am up happy. In fact, now, I am the happiest I have ever been in a long while. I have a great job, I am over coming obstacles everyday - I have great friends and family. Im doing great - - BUT, I still have nightmares - I still have anxiety - I am still affraid. But - thats how its going to be for me. There is no "getting over" what's happened. I deal with it every single day - I still see it (awake or asleep) - its always going to be there. I guess my own recovery is just in HOW I deal with it.
What you said about making sure you get out and do things - continue life as normal as possible - - YOU WERE SO RIGHT! It helps. There are times when I am so paranoid and scared Sh!tless about going out with friends that I want to hide in a dark corner and just hope that the world forgets about me! But I go out - sometimes, I actually have fun! Walking, exercising - things like that - - totally helpful as well!! Its been a huge part of my recovery!

[Applecherry]

It's difficult for me to explain, and I suppose I was not clarifying my thoughts as best as I could.. I am definitely not "very wrong" because I too suffer from PTSD.. You will never get over the trauma, but it will be easier to deal with ONCE you are in a better place in your life "at peace" some soliders who come back from war (the most extreme example of PTSD cases) may have a lot of problems in their life, have a hard time adjusting back into a normal life etc.., and their PTSD would be easier to deal with if they felt better about life in general, that is what I'm saying..

Anxiety never goes away and PTSD is an anxiety based disorder (obviously), so when you are feeling anxious, it's gonna flare up again.. and you're gonna think about it. but it does get better, and easier to deal with when you are feeling better about life! You may think that you just have these nightmares for no reason and that your life is happy, but.. they are there for a reason, whether you realize it or not, you are still feeling anxious about something going on in your life.. and that is why you are having flashbacks of trauma.

Last year I was dealing with so much anxiety and ptsd, and I had a chat with a friend, I told him I can't stop obsessing over these worried thoughts, and I wondered if I could "relive" the thing that was making me upset in my mind, I could then desensitize myself to it.. but he told me something that really made sense, it is not a thought but a feeling that you're dealing with.. and I realized I'd not be helping anything by trying to relive the stress in my mind and analyze it or think about it all the time.. all you can do with PTSD is try to work on changing the major stressors in your life that exacerbate it.

You can agree with me or not, but that is what I truly feel in my heart is the basis of it. The friend I had mentioned really made things more clear to me in that way, because he has long suffered depression and anxiety himself.

[TheBlack]

I have had psychiatrists to tell me to stop being so anxious. That is stupid. People do not choose to have anxiety. That is like telling someone who has depression to snap out of it. Or, like telling a scizophrenic to stop hallucinating. It is not like a choice.

I even had doctors who refused to treat me because they thought I was seeking "drugs". People with anxiety need anti-anxiety medicine, not an antipsychotic or an antidepressant. The only medine that helps me is anti-anxiety medicine. Why do doctors rufuse to treat this disorder?

These psychiatrists and doctors sound unprofessional. I would report them to the relevant authorities or ask a friend/family member to do it on your behalf.

Unfortunately, some practitioners of medicine cannot understand what you are going through because they have never been through it themselves. Many doctors have a good upbringing, are academically successful, financially secure and have a reasonably good life. Since they never experience hardship such as yours, they lack the mental capacity to empathise with you.

Whether it is a choice or not is irrelevant. You are afraid to leave the house. That is the reality of the current situation. Your doctors need to be helping you.

[J19o94y]

A doctor can be trained as much as they like and learn anything and everything but until they have experience some sort of mental illness they become sort of ignorant, the first time I went to see my doctor at 16 I remember babbling irrationally about everything I was so lost... she said nothing throughout my whole appointment until the end she smiled at me in a patronizing way and said 'Let me get you some meds' lol It's like she just wanted me to shut up.

[fortizboriqua]

I agree, I found going to the doctors pointless. I felt they had the right information, but didn't explain it in a way I could use it effectively.

[Lord Jazzinho]

I have had psychiatrists to tell me to stop being so anxious. That is stupid. People do not choose to have anxiety. That is like telling someone who has depression to snap out of it. Or, like telling a scizophrenic to stop hallucinating. It is not like a choice.

I even had doctors who refused to treat me because they thought I was seeking "drugs". People with anxiety need anti-anxiety medicine, not an antipsychotic or an antidepressant. The only medine that helps me is anti-anxiety medicine. Why do doctors rufuse to treat this disorder?

Anxiety is not a choice but as hard as it may seem for you to understand right now recovering from it is (I know I would not have agreed with this when I was bad so I'm trying be sensitive with this answer) Its basically a choice to dwell on the anxiety and its causes or not to and I know that isn't anywhere near as easy as it sounds as it may be things like financial or illness in the family. But in realty what will happen will happen regardless of weather you or I worry about it or not. The choice is a simple one at heart its resolving to hold yourself to it that isn't so simple. You basically have to just refuse to be worried. You have to stop doing things that make you anxious but before you do that you have to find out weather there are things that you do that make you anxious (when I realised that watching the news fed my anxiety I stopped watching and felt a lot better in a short space of time). If you have a negative thought stop it before it starts don't dwell on it or indulge it out of boredom think about something positive or at least neutral that is interesting. You just basically have combat every thing negative in your mind whatever is going on around you. Its hard to do it can be very slow and it may solve all of your problems but anxiety disorder in some ways is like a mental marriage to negativity, divorce it and commit to positivity as much as you can. I hope this is helpful and I'm sorry if it wasn't

[Ponder]

The doctor left me standing by the door. As he closed it, he shot out -> " Thank You" in as bitter a tone as I felt. With regard to thinking - I could not and gestured towards stopping "what kind of fucking doctor are you? We just established I'm unable to think straight and now you drop my like a bag of shit here at your door, fobbing me off to fill out forms I have no clue in which to ask - Form A or Form B? If you fucking cared, you'd stop making things hard and fucking help like your supposed too! You fucking useless CUNT!"

Think positive thoughts hey. Bit hard when when you have to deal with clinical uncaring professionals that do more to bait than actually heal. Thus - disassociate in order to find space.

As for telling us we have a choice. That's a huge misconception often used to slap another in the face! People think too much - and now we beings that we are, no longer know how to be - now find ourselves, unable to comprehend basic human interaction - we are now digital beings:

Albert Einstein — 'I fear the day technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.'

[Dahila]

We do not have a choice with anxiety, it is a disease, causes by difficult circumstances in our life. I am old guys, and I am dealing with that shit well closer to 40 years. I have been to countless doctors, noone know how to help me. They usually offfer stupid advice : You need to stop thinking about the past. Yeah easy said, just turn off the like the radio. That' it is done/

I worry that Albert was right.

People have a good , and excellent ideas about how to manage anxiety, without drugs, working out, distraction, mediatation f**** nirvana, is it?
I have been there and I am still here in square one. If it was not on people here, I would be the loniest person on this planet.....I even lost my beautiful dog, and can not force myslef to get another. I am not young and I do not want strangers to abuse my dog when I go.....
Doctors, you have no idea what kind of doctors I encountered from very early childhood. Months and months in hospitals.... Perverts, criminals, drug addicts, and simply cruel people without any compassion. Sorry maybe my opinion hurts good doctors, but so far I met three good doctors.....that's about it

Dave I am so, so sorry you have to deal with such asshole:(

[Lord Jazzinho]

The doctor left me standing by the door. As he closed it, he shot out -> " Thank You" in as bitter a tone as I felt. With regard to thinking - I could not and gestured towards stopping "what kind of fucking doctor are you? We just established I'm unable to think straight and now you drop my like a bag of shit here at your door, fobbing me off to fill out forms I have no clue in which to ask - Form A or Form B? If you fucking cared, you'd stop making things hard and fucking help like your supposed too! You fucking useless CUNT!"

Think positive thoughts hey. Bit hard when when you have to deal with clinical uncaring professionals that do more to bait than actually heal. Thus - disassociate in order to find space.

As for telling us we have a choice. That's a huge misconception often used to slap another in the face! People think too much - and now we beings that we are, no longer know how to be - now find ourselves, unable to comprehend basic human interaction - we are now digital beings:

Albert Einstein — 'I fear the day technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.'

I did post a reply to this but it is not here so I don't know if you saw it or it ever went up. Anyway I want to make it clear that I have no desire to upset you in any way I had similar experiences with doctors myself. If that is how you feel about your doctor then I suggest if its possible you change your doctor and keep changing till you find one that puts you at ease and that you are able to talk to a little. Weather he is C**T or not he cannot help you now if you feel this way about him and for you to seek help and come back form that in worse more angry state is good believe me tho I do know the type. Any this post of yours also got me to thinking about when I was bad with chronic anxiety so I put a post up some of what was in the missing reply is in it give it a look if you want to carry this on.

http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?24850-Anxiety-Is-a-Truly-Vile-Thing

[Anacin]

I've been put on all the wrong meds too for my anxiety. And yes people who don't have it apparently don't understand and think it's a choice. Like I could work if I wanted to. Or do whatever if I wanted to. WRONG.

[Anacin]

Here's something I don't get. People who know I have anxiety tell me to go meet people. Are they brain dead? They know I have anxiety and can't be AROUND other people. Then they tell me to go out and meet people. And I am sorry but one thing I do not get is how all the people on the anxiety forums I saw online are going to all these meetups if they have anxiety.

[fortizboriqua]

Here's something I don't get. People who know I have anxiety tell me to go meet people. Are they brain dead? They know I have anxiety and can't be AROUND other people. Then they tell me to go out and meet people. And I am sorry but one thing I do not get is how all the people on the anxiety forums I saw online are going to all these meetups if they have anxiety.

Because those people like myself have overcome that fear. But by no means was it easy. I myself used to do what I called exposure therapy. I would purposely walk into supermarkets to lose the fear. Over time it eventually got easier. The hard part is walking in but once in you start to get used to it. If you've been to a doctor they more than likely have taught you cognitive excercises. Those excercises teach you to divert attention to what you fear which are the symptoms of anxiety. When you fear the symptoms you pay attention to them with fear and that fear fuels your anxiety. I used to pray my way in and pray my way through. My cognitive excercises was God. I diverted my attention to Him and eventually it got easier. I used to have panic disorder with agoraphobia and I defeated both within 8 months because I used God as my tool.

[MiST]

I don't think many people really think that do they? I mean the clue is in the name..LOL

[Kixxi]

Here's something I don't get. People who know I have anxiety tell me to go meet people. Are they brain dead? They know I have anxiety and can't be AROUND other people. Then they tell me to go out and meet people. And I am sorry but one thing I do not get is how all the people on the anxiety forums I saw online are going to all these meetups if they have anxiety.

I get it totally. My family constantly tells me to go out, and my first reaction is are you f*in crazy? (I'm agoraphobic, hence the crazy part...) Either way, they are right in a way. In order to overcome it, I have to go out. Last week I went out to a store and actually bought something myself. Yes, I was scared. But I told myself, don't think to much about it and just do it. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. Unfortunately, the only real solution for anxiety sufferers is exposure in combination with retraining your brain... It's terrifying, but the more you do it the more you realise nothing happens to you.

[Zena]

I don't really expect people to truly understand how difficult it is unless they've been there themselves. Being misunderstood can be very frustrating and disheartening, though. I totally get it.

[MiST]

Like the saying goes, "Don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes"

[SD JONES]

HAD A doc tell me, to get the hell out of his office, saying I was looking for drugs for free, It was 2nd visit in a week, because I did not know what was happening to me and he had the balls to say GET OUT you are looking for free drugs...
I felt ashamed and left...................................

[susie1953]

anxiety is awfull it has ruined my life i am not on any meds but after speaking to my doc i will be seeing someone next week .anxiety has been with me a big part of my life i cant go out alone i manage to take my dog for a walk in the morning but where i live its very quite even then im glad to get home .i have a great husband and son but no friends because i have cut myself off from the world so much so yes anxiety is awfull

[Kirk]

My mother I believe had some form of undiagnosed agoraphobia, as she rarely if ever left her house. My sister had agoraphobia for a time and did not leave my parents house for one year. She is
now 55 and this happened to her when she was around 19 or 20, if I recall. I am the opposite. I get ants in my pants and can't stay at home unless I am sick. Many people generally don't understand
mental illness. A friend of mind used to say my mother had hermitism.

[Kixxi]

My mother I believe had some form of undiagnosed agoraphobia, as she rarely if ever left her house. My sister had agoraphobia for a time and did not leave my parents house for one year. She is
now 55 and this happened to her when she was around 19 or 20, if I recall. I am the opposite. I get ants in my pants and can't stay at home unless I am sick. Many people generally don't understand
mental illness. A friend of mind used to say my mother had hermitism.

It's certainly not a choice. All I can say is that a combination of medication and therapy has helped me quite a bit. Even though I still get some anxiety from time to time, mainly when I leave the home, I can cope with it a lot better than I used to.

[Kirk]

On a side note, we went on vacation to London in June 2010 and it was wonderful and it did not rain at all.
People were shocked when we told them it did not rain. I am also glad you are doing better.

[PinkIcePrincess]

Bumping this up!
Agoraphobia is the worse ever I have it and I am so sick of it and the other mental and physical health problems I have is just driving me deeper into agoraphobia I am in pain a lot due to my head and back which both need surgery on.
What bothers me is that people who also have mental health issues believe that everyone is the same and that you should just get up and walk out the door well first off I HAVE explained many times I have health problems so it is JUST NOT THAT EASY but for some reason they think I am lying even if they have seen my mri of my brain and I have explained over and over and over so wy would the people that have it keep dragging me down and not help me to get better offer advice but do not judge and say YOU are not trying hard enough YOU are not liking doctors and therapist blah blah blah etc... they are not helping they are only out to bring you down so do not ever allow them to do that cut them off like a nasty mole they will continue to dig at you in front of others not in messages on facebook but out in the open which proves how cruel they are. May God have mercy on their souls.

Fight for YOU and Believe in yourself take small steps, take some bottle water with you, if you need a wash cloth take one, or if you need your med take one, go slowly and know you are not alone , I finally got a therapist over the phone since I cant leave my home and no one does home visits.
Trust in you!!

[Abel101]

Anxiety can be cured by filling our mind with positive thoughts.

[Ponder]

Anxiety can be cured by filling our mind with positive thoughts.
http://www.sherv.net/cm/emo/laughing/rolling-on-the-floor-laughing-smiley-emoticon.gif That's how people become deluded.

[marky77]

I know exactly how you feel. My doctor flat-out refuses to prescribe me any benzodiazapine. I am on two anti-depressants and two anti-psychotics by my main issue is ANXIETY

[Dahila]

two days ago I went to my psychiatrist , then she wrote the script for benzo, I talked to her why in Europe docs do not prescribe it, her answer; cause they are crazy, I am not kidding

[Imperfect]

LOL

Thankfully mine knows not to prescribe me anything. I must be crazy. :) as long as the patient is comfortable with and educated in the use and methods prescribed I then feel both parties are sane enough.

[marky77]

I know exactly how you feel. My doctor flat-out refuses to prescribe me any benzodiazapine. I am on two anti-depressants and two anti-psychotics by my main issue is ANXIETY

Because benzo's are highly addictive and (ALLEGEDLY, according the UK/EU doctors) don't work for long and you end up on massive doses and still being anxious (as someone who took the same dose of clonazepam - which I got online after attempting suicide due to anxiety and lack of help - for 2 years and it still worked, I beg to differ).
People living in the US and Canada who suffer anxiety have no idea how lucky they are to get those miracle benzos.

[salvator here]

Its getting that way here in the states; my doctor has a sign on the reception window that states, no narcotics period.

[salvator here]

I wouldn't have chosen to be this much of a hermit, little by little it turned into this. Now, though, I can work with it and try to better enjoy my own company and just accept that I prefer to be an introvert in all aspects. I do hope one day that I can become less isolated when the time it right. Take it slowly and allow people into my life on a small level I think. Being a homebody is different that being agoraphobic, I've gotten better at being able to at least leave the house and even walk out the front door and across the street if nothing else.

[Imperfect]

Extroversion is WAY overrated Sal. Just use strength based language when reflecting on our own circumstances. I've come to see that we always have a choice - but how I arrive as such allows me to see beyond wrong and right. I see positives in being a little bit of this and that. To box myself into once category is allowing narrow minded ideologies/philosophies to dictate my path. Again - we always have a choice. We all choose the path we take regardless of things outside out control. Perhaps better said we can choose to control how we react in circumstance and environments beyond our control. The less we seek to take responsibility for our self, the more we are controlled.

I like your use of the word homebody. Love it in fact. :)

That's taking control!

[Dahila]

Because benzo's are highly addictive and (ALLEGEDLY, according the UK/EU doctors) don't work for long and you end up on massive doses and still being anxious (as someone who took the same dose of clonazepam - which I got online after attempting suicide due to anxiety and lack of help - for 2 years and it still worked, I beg to differ).
People living in the US and Canada who suffer anxiety have no idea how lucky they are to get those miracle benzos.

According to UK doctors (the ones that euthanize kids). I am on small, the smallest dose of clonazepam for years, never need it to up it . It is addictive to only the addicts or people prone to addiction, We have a gentleman here who is on one tablet of xanax for the last 16 years and he never went up with dose. Marky we do know how lucky we are, the craziness in UK is famous now, They would rather give you Antidepressants that do not work, than cheap medication that you have on hand while getting panic attack. Remember no business for big pharma on benzos, they are like a cent each pill with the packaging. AD on the other hand are expensive and it is business, never forget that doctors are in business of .........not healing that for sure

[Imperfect]

According to UK doctors (the ones that euthanize kids)http://www.sherv.net/cm/emo/happy/rolling-on-the-floor-laughing-smiley-emoticon.gif
______________________
_______
__

Not sure the following makes sense ... but I am sure for some it will:

It's like:

https://image.ibb.co/k7wTY9/Apple_Orange_2.png

[salvator here]

Dahila.. they're doing the same thing here with sleep meds as well like ambien and sonata. From what I here, some won't even prescribe Gabapentin anymore either; luckily, I am not in that position (YET). Thanks to the war on drugs folks :(

Yeah, D.. I love being a loner, wouldn't want in any other way :)

[Dahila]

Dahila.. they're doing the same thing here with sleep meds as well like ambien and sonata. From what I here, some won't even prescribe Gabapentin anymore either; luckily, I am not in that position (YET). Thanks to the war on drugs folks :(

Yeah, D.. I love being a loner, wouldn't want in any other way :)

I am talking ie Elfie, unfrotunately in UK is a lot of newborn deatsh, and it is not coincidence :) Mr, Imperfect
Sal yeah this is why you need to have psychiatrist, Ambien is really bad, really bad medication. Gabapentin I gained 60 pounds on it , it helps though but caused a massive hunger in me. I have like 10 thousands pills in house, Want the address Sal ?

[salvator here]

Lol.. I'll keep that in mind...I'm just kidding :D

I do have both a therapist and an APRN (that prescribes meds). I'm sure I could do better with a psychiatrist but I don't have the money and have to rely on community health services. Honestly, I would rather not be on anything, but I am on meds for some physical conditions as well. I feel like if I could drop 15 pounds I wouldn't need blood pressure meds anymore. I'm not a big guy so 162 is overweight for me since I am not muscular. I'm on a low dose, also because I suffer heart damage due in large part form alcohol and ephedrine usage in my younger years -we pay the price as we get older for sure. I'm also on (the dreaded) Prednisone, I do need it, and without it, I can't even move. This med causes anxiety and sleep problem and I understand that. Every time I try to go off it, I wind up in severe pain and need to go back on it. And of course I take something for acid reflux as that is a side-effect of Prednisone. See the circle of how meds snow ball into other health conditions. It never ends.

[Dahila]

yes Sal a lot we cause ourselves , who is not sinner ? we all overuse alcohol , drugs, meds, bohemian life style in my case had not help rather the opposite, I am also overweight got the extra weight while on gabapentin, never again. But my anxiety was not existent at the time I was on it. OH the Ephedrine I was for years on it, now I am on symbicort that takes a good care of my lungs. Prednisone is a must in a lot of cases, however it has a serious side effect one of them is anxiety , Heightened anxiety. Ephedrine does help with asthma attack but cause high heart beat , shaking of hands, panic attacks........I know it all Sal I had been there......I just seen that I wrote a part of sentence in Polish heheeeeeeeeeeeeee I am going to edit it

[Imperfect]

Full respect for you guys. I see my psychiatrist in about a week and a half. Just working on a new diagnoses. Got to keep those labels up to scratch. :)

[Dahila]

Full respect for you guys. I see my psychiatrist in about a week and a half. Just working on a new diagnoses. Got to keep those labels up to scratch. :)

Mr. Meanie ;) ...................

[Imperfect]

Seriously ... working on my stability is my contribution to society. It's a tough job, but I love you all so much. :)

[salvator here]

Thank you man :)

While it may seem (at times) I'm doing well here, I'm far from stable, not at all actually, moments I do feel alright, but still I have moments too dark to be on here. I know you've seen me here at my worst, but it serves me better to be offline during these times, as I know they do always pass eventuality. In fact; I'm not even bothering to strive for stability anymore, I'm going for flexibility over stability. Adjusting and forgiving myself and moving on quicker and not being so hard on myself during times I'm doing poorly. I take the good days now and appreciate them with the understanding that sometimes they are short lived.

It is a tough job to be well in a world that sometimes feels unforgiving to those of us struggling to just keep up with what some people would consider the basics of everyday. I suspect (if I'm being honest), I'm dealing with more that just simple mental illness in the classic sense. I've always realized I don't see things as other do, even earliest memories from childhood. I'm unique though.

I do with you all the success in finding whatever helps you to feel content with your own life and circumstances, and appreciate that you truly care about other people as you've show here to others. You seem to me to be the type of friend that would be there for somebody during good and bad times, and that is unusual these days.

[Imperfect]

Actually Sal ... some of your words remind me how overrated stability is. Thanks for the reminder. Instability is often where 'it's' at. At least when you can reach an objective state that appreciates having lived rather than not.

Being neurotypical is akin to going through life with one's eyes closed. It's good to see one's self as special. That's a good sign that your doing well enough. I came across a good lecture by Alan Watts on 'Trusting The Universe' ... I will link in my Journal thread soon enough. It's a good one on how not to strive ... how to let go by seeing that there is actually nothing to hang on to. Make me think 'arrrrrrr that's why society is always trying to give us choices and then say "You chose" ...' (although choosing is part and parcel of life ... we should be the one to find the things we choose ... not always be told) If you cling to nothing then there is nothing to let go of. See how it is that society gives and when you don't grab ... they then treat you as abnormal? ...call people 'non compliant' or in our younger years simply treat us badly because we choose not to play 'the game' "Your not a team player ... Your this and that ... label and more labels" I get the feeling you kind of understand?

Yea ... it helps when others can also stand by me or at least be there when there able when I too go through my own periods of 'unstable' Sadly we live in a selfish society (even those who claim to live by love and light - more so ... the run from negativity and or effort) --- I find enduring those unstable periods together with others is what makes us better friends which is why I said ... 'Instability is where it's at." At least being there when the storm has passed. It's how nature thrives and why living on one flat line ... creates more sideffects. I've actually read some of your own words to that effect. I'm happy for you that you and a few others are ware of this. It's good to mix things up. : )

[Dahila]

you need support while you are down, not when you are ok. Friends that help you in tough time are real friends

[salvator here]

Thanks Dahila, I really appreciate it.

Yeah, I'm only used to one-sided friendships sad to admit. I guess as they say, you can count your real friends on one hand if you're lucky. Several people have been very supportive on here when I was in a bad place, and I never forgot it.