sunshine33
01-26-2006, 10:00 PM
Hi,
Im new here. Im a 24 year old female and I was diagnosed with GAD and depression a few years ago. I believe ever since age 12 I was like this and never new it until I got myself help. Im not medicated and I just relied on my boyfriend and therapist for guidance.
Problem is my relationship with bf is suffering because of my anxiety. The What if's???, worry etc CONSUME me. Everyday I always have something to worry about with my relationship or life in general. When I do find something to worry about I will worry and worry till Im blue in the face. I wake up every morning thinking of the worry and the whole day is wasted. I've been going out with my bf for over 4 years everything is great, he's stood by me through my bad times and anxiety, I love him so much. Thing is instead of cherishing my relationship I think WHAT IF what if WHAT IF??????? What if he finds another girl???? What if he's bi or gay? ---> thats the new worry I've made up in my head. Im thinking to myself why in the world is this relationship so great...there has to be something WRONG. Than I start to analyze him and his actions....oooo why did he look at that guy like that?....why did he make a gay joke to his friends ( his friends and him make jokes to each other a lot), Why does he hang out with his friend and go out to lunch? (his friend has stage 3 cancer and my bf is being supportive), than bfs mom said to me..they hang out a lot...than I worry OMG why why did she say that I start to think of every possible situation.
Than I said somethign to him a few days ago...he said your asking me if im gay? What do you think?? Im not going to even answer this question. So than after he said that Im analyzing what he said....well why didnt he answer the question.....is he hiding sometihing (which he's not). In fact me and him make comments about hot girls a lot, he looks a girl porn...why the heck would this come into mind....but once i have a worry i obsessivley think about it...ive been thinking about this for about 5 weeks.
The internet doesnt help either its a catalyst for the worries..I look up stuff and bam that feeds it even more.
I worry about doctors , getting stuff done at the doctor...everything.
Has anyone been in this situation?
I can't live like this no more.
Im new here. Im a 24 year old female and I was diagnosed with GAD and depression a few years ago. I believe ever since age 12 I was like this and never new it until I got myself help. Im not medicated and I just relied on my boyfriend and therapist for guidance.
Problem is my relationship with bf is suffering because of my anxiety. The What if's???, worry etc CONSUME me. Everyday I always have something to worry about with my relationship or life in general. When I do find something to worry about I will worry and worry till Im blue in the face. I wake up every morning thinking of the worry and the whole day is wasted. I've been going out with my bf for over 4 years everything is great, he's stood by me through my bad times and anxiety, I love him so much. Thing is instead of cherishing my relationship I think WHAT IF what if WHAT IF??????? What if he finds another girl???? What if he's bi or gay? ---> thats the new worry I've made up in my head. Im thinking to myself why in the world is this relationship so great...there has to be something WRONG. Than I start to analyze him and his actions....oooo why did he look at that guy like that?....why did he make a gay joke to his friends ( his friends and him make jokes to each other a lot), Why does he hang out with his friend and go out to lunch? (his friend has stage 3 cancer and my bf is being supportive), than bfs mom said to me..they hang out a lot...than I worry OMG why why did she say that I start to think of every possible situation.
Than I said somethign to him a few days ago...he said your asking me if im gay? What do you think?? Im not going to even answer this question. So than after he said that Im analyzing what he said....well why didnt he answer the question.....is he hiding sometihing (which he's not). In fact me and him make comments about hot girls a lot, he looks a girl porn...why the heck would this come into mind....but once i have a worry i obsessivley think about it...ive been thinking about this for about 5 weeks.
The internet doesnt help either its a catalyst for the worries..I look up stuff and bam that feeds it even more.
I worry about doctors , getting stuff done at the doctor...everything.
Has anyone been in this situation?
I can't live like this no more.