brittypixi
11-17-2008, 01:57 PM
so, basically i've been dealing with anxiety since the beginning of september, and my anxiety manifested itself into doubts about my boyfriend. it's improving but my problem is that for like a week ill be so in love and happy and just like i was before but then i get a setback and for a couple days ill say things like "i don't love him, i don't want to be with him, i only love him as a friend" etc, ill come up with like 15 different reasons/doubts.
one thing that seems to make me feel better is when i think about us breaking up, now that sounds funny but what i mean is that when i think about taking a break or breaking up i know that i'de miss him terribly and i would just come right back to him. we have taken a break and broken up twice due to my crazy anxiety doubts and i always miss him so much and come right back to him usually within a couple hours.
another thing is that there is nothing WRONG with our relationship, he is supportive, hes sweet, he takes care of me, hes great, he even comes to therapy with me once a month! so, nothing has changed in our relationship except my anxiety, so it doesn't make sense that i would have any reason to fall out of love or feel any different. we were together for a year and 5 months before i even had doubts, we planned marriage, moving in, kids, etc! so basically my therapist tells me to focus on the facts:
1. a year and 5 months extremely happy, in love never wanting ANYTHING else.
2. when we break up/take a break i miss him terribly and always come back.
3. my parents, sister, and boyfriend who know me best always tell me that this is my anxiety and they KNOW i love him!
anyways, basically my anxiety confuses me so bad and i convince myself stupid things are true. if i didn't love him or wanna be with him i would have already left him its been three months! anywho so can anyone relate, offer advice or anything? i would really appreciate it! i hope everyone else is doing well too. :)
one thing that seems to make me feel better is when i think about us breaking up, now that sounds funny but what i mean is that when i think about taking a break or breaking up i know that i'de miss him terribly and i would just come right back to him. we have taken a break and broken up twice due to my crazy anxiety doubts and i always miss him so much and come right back to him usually within a couple hours.
another thing is that there is nothing WRONG with our relationship, he is supportive, hes sweet, he takes care of me, hes great, he even comes to therapy with me once a month! so, nothing has changed in our relationship except my anxiety, so it doesn't make sense that i would have any reason to fall out of love or feel any different. we were together for a year and 5 months before i even had doubts, we planned marriage, moving in, kids, etc! so basically my therapist tells me to focus on the facts:
1. a year and 5 months extremely happy, in love never wanting ANYTHING else.
2. when we break up/take a break i miss him terribly and always come back.
3. my parents, sister, and boyfriend who know me best always tell me that this is my anxiety and they KNOW i love him!
anyways, basically my anxiety confuses me so bad and i convince myself stupid things are true. if i didn't love him or wanna be with him i would have already left him its been three months! anywho so can anyone relate, offer advice or anything? i would really appreciate it! i hope everyone else is doing well too. :)