Introvert WITH social anxiety

[equiiaddict]

So as the title suggests, I'm an introvert (INFJ on the MBTI test) with social anxiety. (I have generalized anxiety and it carries over into every aspect of my life.) I have a decent amount of friends and still have somewhat of a social life, but I also don't really WANT much of one either. Not just because of the anxiety, but because I'm drained by too much social interaction and I need a lot of time to myself to recharge. I've found that I tend to befriend other introverts because their friendships don't require much maintenance. (As in, constant talking or hanging out in order to maintain it.)
Also in my experiences it seems like a lot of extroverts have social anxiety but still want to go out, make friends, etc so they don't really get the other side of it that I also deal with. It's almost like I'm worried my SA will never improve because I have no desire to really make it improve because I don't enjoy much socializing, if that makes sense.

Is there anybody else out there like me? Sometimes I feel like it's a double whammy with the introversion and social anxiety together and it's hard for people to understand. Just wanted to vent. :)

[Anne1221]

From another post your wrote, it sounds like you have a good amount of social connections/friendships/family. You don't really need more, unless you start to feel lonely. Don't try to compare to others...don't forget many people have said they can feel lonely in a crowd of people.

It sounds as if your anxiety is acting up to "help" you find one more thing to worry about. Watch out for the "What If's? As in..."What if my social anxiety doesn't improve?" Just deal with life as it comes to you.
If you need more social interactions, you'll know it and you can work on that.

P.S. I have a whole list of "What If's" which are things I worried about but never materialized!

[Ponder]

Although I am currently actively socializing in group settings, I am specifically hanging with people who have things in common like myself. Many of us do not like to socialize at all, yet we are doing it with each other all the same.

You pretty much some up the reasons as to why this can be the case. In fact you nailed as far as I am concerned. It works for both label, introvert or extrovert. Perhaps it's more a case of finding out where your at and what you'd like without giving in to the pressure of external opinions / influences. Just be true to yourself.

I'm thinking there are plenty of people out there that feel the same way. I just try not to box my way into one mind set as once I could not give two &^#s about socializing at all ... but now I do mix with others similar to myself (yet different in other ways) or at least I have found a yearning to mix with others and take the time to understand others not so much like me. Like you said though ... it's important not to drain myself (& others) in that process.

Society has some weird concepts at to what socialization really is. It's commonly more about getting together and consuming rather than real community connections. People rarely take the time to get to know each other which I find sad. It's all external, status and so forth. Yea ... there is more and more introversion popping up all over the place. I think if people let others just be who they are, then others may be more inclined to let other in.

I try not to term myself in such limited ways with intro or extra (but it does help to understand the processing of said terms) ... I think I get what your saying about the 'irony' ... AKA Double Bind.

You said it well.

[Fox hidden in the woods]

I struggle, my personality type is INFP, to the point i hardly go out. Extreme social anxiety, fo rme theree's no one to fight for a sdesire, i am content but struggelling gettin ghelp.

[lorddarconis]

I'm an INTJ and I struggle with it too. I moved to a new city a year ago and haven't made any friends yet. Social anxiety makes it hard. The longer I go without making friends, the worse the anxiety gets, and the harder it is to go out and make some.

[Ponder]

Have you considered finding groups that accommodate others like yourself. As in Mental Health Groups? I find them to give me a boost so I can better project when I am out. People generally don't want to connect with people who are down and out. I'm not just talking about no J-O-B or Money ... I mean people don't want to connect with others whom are struggling and depressed. This pretty much accounts for most of today's population. Denial keeps many from seeking out others like themselves. Best thing I did was start attending groups with others who understand what it's like to be a recluse.