Constant Anxiety Pains and Fear

[musicmaker5454]

I have had constant anxiety pains in my left arm, fingers, chest, and throughout for about a year. I had a massive panic attack on my college campus, and i thought I was having a heart attack. I just remember having the unending feeling of wanting to break down and cry for 20 minutes.
Also, I am not the thinnest person in the world, but my parents think that my curves are the reason I will get heart attacks diabetes and every other health problem. They make it known to me every chance they get. it has never helped. Ever. It actually made the anxiety pains worse, as now I'm on the constant fear of one split second, something horrible will happen to me medically.
Sometimes, I don't feel like I'm living life, but living day to day. Has anyone felt like this? If so, how do you manage? I could really use the advice

[gypsylee]

Hi musicmaker and welcome :)

Yeah I often feel like I'm just existing rather than living. I think a lot of people feel like that at the moment, as society gets more and more materialistic, and people feel more alienated from each other (despite how connected we are technologically).

Sometimes I don't manage very well at all and feel like just drinking/drugging myself into oblivion. What keeps me going in my darkest moments is my 15yo daughter (even though she lives with her father in a different state and I don't see much of her atm) and how badly it would affect her if I gave up. My parents have already lost one child as well, in 2014, so I couldn't put them through that again. But yeah, a lot of the time I feel like I'm just existing in limbo for other people and it's pretty depressing.

I have a good relationship with my GP and my psychiatrist, which makes a difference. I'm on a few different medications, though I'm going to speak to my psych this week about changing anti-depressants.

I also read a lot, which helps to relax me.. Sometimes fiction, but also a fair bit of non-fiction "spiritual" stuff, which I've been drawn to since my early 20s (along the lines of Carl Jung, Alan Watts, Terence McKenna, and Eastern philosophers).

Anyway, I hope you find some support here..

Gypsy x

[Ponder]

Hello again musicmaker,

Gypsy nailed it as far as I am concerned. I see a therapist, eat healthy, keep active, get outside of at least part of the day and also read similar to gypsy.

Having improved my physical health has helped me to tolerate the world, although. I'm certainly not exactly totting one of those ecstatic smiles that's used to sell that latest products.

It helps to reach out to others.

Day By Day is actually a good way to live. I hope some day you find that aspect an agreeable one.

Wishing you all the best.

[littlestarsmum]

I’m so sorry to hear about your struggles. My heart goes out to you at this time. You don’t need to be hard on yourself. I know it’s not easy to go through this. Are you seeing a therapist? A caring professional therapist would be in an excellent position to offer support and help you to cope with your difficulties. I just said a prayer for you, and I hope that God will surround you with His healing presence and fill you with His joy, strength, and peace. Stay strong, friend. Sending prayers your way!

[musicmaker5454]

Thanks everyone! I am seeing therapist, and she helps, and i do take some medication, but sometimes it doesn't seem like enough. I know when I'm working, I don't feel a thing, but when i'm driving or trying to fall asleep is when it hurts the most. And the thing is, I do like to read, read manga, go out and walk. But it feels like numbing my brain with things like netflix is easier with the reverse effect... Any suggestions how I can reverse this cycle?

[Rick(amateur)]

I have had constant anxiety pains in my left arm, fingers, chest, and throughout for about a year. I had a massive panic attack on my college campus, and i thought I was having a heart attack. I just remember having the unending feeling of wanting to break down and cry for 20 minutes.
Also, I am not the thinnest person in the world, but my parents think that my curves are the reason I will get heart attacks diabetes and every other health problem. They make it known to me every chance they get. it has never helped. Ever. It actually made the anxiety pains worse, as now I'm on the constant fear of one split second, something horrible will happen to me medically.
Sometimes, I don't feel like I'm living life, but living day to day. Has anyone felt like this? If so, how do you manage? I could really use the advice

I had days where I wish it simply ended so I can get to the next one. It's not a way to live and I hope to leave it all behind me. I manage by digging into my past. Note that I'm not dwelling on it. It's more of me trying to uncover who I am because, having been hurt, I've built layers upon layers of wall around me that hurts me more than it protects me. Learning who I am will tell me what I want to do with my life. Instead of living aimlessly, I want to make a dream come true.


Thanks everyone! I am seeing therapist, and she helps, and i do take some medication, but sometimes it doesn't seem like enough. I know when I'm working, I don't feel a thing, but when i'm driving or trying to fall asleep is when it hurts the most. And the thing is, I do like to read, read manga, go out and walk. But it feels like numbing my brain with things like netflix is easier with the reverse effect... Any suggestions how I can reverse this cycle?

Actively taking initiative to seek help is a good first step. Now, you might want to find the source of your problems. It will be painful learning about who you are since you have to relive part of your past. However, it will be worth it when you can leave your painful past mostly behind you. Numbing the pain doesn't make the pain go away and the numbing effects diminish over time. I know that from experience. Do you want to share some more about your past? I know it's not easy. I was once really shy and couldn't talk to strangers but life taught me that, if I made up my mind, I can accomplish what I thought was impossible.