rtayatay
12-05-2016, 06:25 PM
Hi, everyone. I'm new here. I've had occasional significant anxieties for many years, but have had a 'banner' year anxiety-wise and am now hitting something every few days. Most of the time, my anxieties are health-related. I get stuck in a 'spot' where I now what I'm thinking isn't reasonable or realistic, yet I can't seem to break free from the thinking pattern. It usually takes some kind of expert diagnosis (i.e. scan, test result, etc.) until I can get past the issue. I have started seeing a therapist (psychologist), but so far it hasn't helped much. I have a first appointment with a psychiatrist this week, which in my mind might result in trying medication to help.
Today's health anxiety ironically came from a massage. I have been encouraged to find more ways to relax, have self-care, etc., and I worked over the weekend, so I thought I'd fit in a massage during lunch. It was going fine, until she started working on my neck. In addition to the back of my neck, she was rubbing the side of my neck, from right behind my jawbone and straight down. It hurt a bit and felt uncomfortable. She did it a few times until I spoke up, and she moved on. But in my mind, I immediately wondered if she had damaged an artery by massaging too hard. The rest of the day, I've googled (I know, I know - bad idea) how you can get hurt through massages, You-Tubed massage therapy for the neck (I did see people doing the same thing done to me, which was somewhat comforting), and unfortunately read about symptoms when your artery becomes damaged, which of course I have now felt twinges of.
This is par-for-the-course for me. Unfortunately, the last 6 months has produced regular issues just like this. I am trying to be cool about it, but it has pretty much derailed my day today, and has done the same for many other days. I appreciate the forum as an opportunity to see that other people struggle with this kind of stuff too... one of the toughest parts about this anxiety stuff is that it's embarrassing, and just seems like something anyone should be able to work through... yet somehow, I just haven't been able to do it.
Other anxieties have come from house maintenance issues and other general life issues where I'm concerned something is wrong, or I handled something wrong, and it's somehow going to hurt someone or mess something up.
When the anxiety is gone, I feel completely normal. I compare it to the feeling others have shared about kidney stones... they're torture while they're there, but once they're gone, you're completely back to normal.
I'm an otherwise normal guy - married, 2 kids, regular job, same job for 20+ years, love sports, have 2 dogs, etc. But this thing has been tough. Thanks for any input or words of encouragement.
Today's health anxiety ironically came from a massage. I have been encouraged to find more ways to relax, have self-care, etc., and I worked over the weekend, so I thought I'd fit in a massage during lunch. It was going fine, until she started working on my neck. In addition to the back of my neck, she was rubbing the side of my neck, from right behind my jawbone and straight down. It hurt a bit and felt uncomfortable. She did it a few times until I spoke up, and she moved on. But in my mind, I immediately wondered if she had damaged an artery by massaging too hard. The rest of the day, I've googled (I know, I know - bad idea) how you can get hurt through massages, You-Tubed massage therapy for the neck (I did see people doing the same thing done to me, which was somewhat comforting), and unfortunately read about symptoms when your artery becomes damaged, which of course I have now felt twinges of.
This is par-for-the-course for me. Unfortunately, the last 6 months has produced regular issues just like this. I am trying to be cool about it, but it has pretty much derailed my day today, and has done the same for many other days. I appreciate the forum as an opportunity to see that other people struggle with this kind of stuff too... one of the toughest parts about this anxiety stuff is that it's embarrassing, and just seems like something anyone should be able to work through... yet somehow, I just haven't been able to do it.
Other anxieties have come from house maintenance issues and other general life issues where I'm concerned something is wrong, or I handled something wrong, and it's somehow going to hurt someone or mess something up.
When the anxiety is gone, I feel completely normal. I compare it to the feeling others have shared about kidney stones... they're torture while they're there, but once they're gone, you're completely back to normal.
I'm an otherwise normal guy - married, 2 kids, regular job, same job for 20+ years, love sports, have 2 dogs, etc. But this thing has been tough. Thanks for any input or words of encouragement.