Neck Shaking

[Paul25]

Hi All,

First post here, I'm 25, been suffering with anxiety for 10 years now. I landed a job recently and each day is a struggle. For some reason whenever I'm talking to my boss, my heart begins to race and i start to get into a panicked state. I'm on Inderal 5mg and Lyrica 75 in the morning and 100mg in the night & have seen slight improvements. The Inderal i take each morning but i feel the dose may be too low.

What's really crippling me is that whenever I'm talking to my boss or in a public place, the adrenaline starts and my neck and shoulder begin to tense and shake very bad and its crippling. I cant hold eye contact what so ever without this happening.

Has anyone here had this problem? If so, what methods have you used to cope with this and reducing stress levels in general when talking to someone.

Any hints & tips are sooooo extremely helpful.

Kindest Regards,

Paul

[gypsylee]

Hi Paul and welcome :)

I get this when my anxiety is bad too. I googled Inderal and it's a beta-blocker, which theoretically should stop the heart racing but I've never taken them. Lyrica I have taken and it makes me feel weird but helps me sleep.

Anyway, yeah, it's social anxiety so when you're talking to someone you're on high alert and all your muscles are tensed. You're basically ready to fight the person haha. I get it sometimes if I have to speak to someone in a shop and if it's really bad I actually stand there rubbing my neck lol. I just act like I've got a bad headache or something. Years ago when I was too embarrassed to do that I'd deliberately wear a necklace that I could fiddle with and that somehow alleviated the shakiness when talking to someone.

But in your case it's a more constant situation ie. work, so you really want to treat the actual tension. As you say, the 5mg Inderal might be too low to be effective. Have you spoken to the doc about benzos? If you've had anxiety for 10 years you've probably had them and in my opinion they are the most effective (but most addictive). SSRIs can be really helpful for social anxiety as well I find, but take much longer to kick in.

Obviously there are non-drug solutions as well but I'd go see the doctor again and tell him/her exactly what's happening.

All the best,
Gypsy x

[Dahila]

Welcome Paul; for years I was so tense that I could not go out to eat, my hands shaked so much. Then next few years the shoulders and neck, the worst were the knees they move so much I could not stand up. it passed, now I just get regular High blood pressure when panicky ;) Welcome to the forum Paul

[Teafrenzy]

I would recommend having a friend play the "role" of your boss. Sounds strange I know. Have him dress up in a suit and pretend to be your boss. I think the only way to get over this is with continued exposure and broadening of your comfort zone. Unfortunately you can't really ask your boss to practice.

[Paul25]

Hi All,

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply back. It feels great to be able to discuss this with you all. It's hard for most people to understand how this feels without thinking your insane. I think increasing the Inderal is a good idea, the doc has put me on 10mg, 2 - 3 times / day but i need to be careful incase my blood pressure drops too low. Thank you gypsylee for your response, i think buying a chain and playing with it during a conversation is a great idea to distract myself. Unfortunately, the doc wont put me on benzos, i've asked but she think their too addictive and I'll get too dependent.

Hi Dahila & Teafrenzy, I think role playing is a great idea. Exposure therapy is always great. I'm going to work none the less but it is a struggle. I'm currently practicing mindfulness and also Progression Muscle Relaxation but like everything it's slow to alter the brains automatic responses to stress.

Any more ideas on how to beat a shaking head neck and shoulders while talking to someone would be great. I'll give the above ideas a try.

Thanks a mill all.

Kind Regards,

Paul

[Kirk]

Welcome to the forum Paul. Taking deep breaths or doing some form of isometric exercise may help, such as grabbing the chair you are sitting
on, clenching your fist, etc.

[Dahila]

I think a mantra would help. Chose the one which is focusing on safety in social situation. I usually go with I am happy, I am healthy, I am not in danger, I am have easy of life. I repeat it in my mind, it kinds of calming me down. you could just say I am safe now and replace any fear with focusing on the mantra. I am terrified when I need to talk to people, the shaking is inside so no one see it, I am trying to destruct myself when talking to people;)) after so many years of it, I got pretty good at it;) So will you
Paul it is refreshing is it not, when you meet people who suffer with exactly the same thing;) ?

[Paul25]

Hi Kirk, isometric exercises sounds like a great idea to distract me from the symptoms. Will give that a go. Thanks Dahila, yes it brilliant to know so many people have the same/similar experiences in Social situations - that in itself is somewhat of a healer. Thanks for taking the time to reply :)

[gypsylee]

Some good suggestions here :)

Getting a chain to wear around your neck is a good idea.. I found it stopped my neck shaking when talking to people because you aren't just sitting there looking at them doing nothing lol. I guess it's a distraction but also a subtle way of putting a "guard" between you and them so you don't feel so exposed.

I just remembered another little trick one of my anxious friends uses: she wears a rubber band or hair tie around her wrist and flicks it when she's in a situation that makes her anxious. She's a bit masochistic lol so the pain of the thing flicking distracts her from the anxiety.

As you say though, just knowing there are others who experience the same thing is very helpful. Next time you're talking to your boss you can imagine all of us anxious people standing there using our tricks haha.

Cheers,
Gypsy x