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View Full Version : Please take the time to read this, I really need an opinion.



Aka_Hobbes
10-21-2016, 06:13 PM
Okay so I snapped my leg in half about a year and a half ago, I mean I completely snapped it in half about halfway inbetween the knee and the ankle, it literally folded in half. I watched it fold in half repeatedly as I was freaking out and was trying to move my leg. Im not sure why I was trying to move it, I guess it was a mix of panic and adrenaline. But everytime I lifted it up only the half connected to my knee raised up, the rest was only held up by skin and muscle so it just folded in on itself. I was thirty feet up a ladder when a bulldozer drove by and shook my ladder out from underneath me. Right as I hit the floor my leg slid inbetween the ladder and the floor, with the weight from my body landing on top of the ladder my leg was caught in, my leg didnt stand a chance. It kindve spider web shattered in two other places and I broke my ankle as well. On top of that my foot completely disconnected from my ankle, unraveling the tendons in my ankle and severing the nerves. During surgery they had to break my knee so they could literally pound a metal bar through it with a hammer. I now have a bar going from my knee to my ankle, and five remaining screws. There were seven in total as well as a metal plate that was holding the tendons in my ankle together, but those two screws were coming loose so they took them out as well as the plate since it was no longer needed. After about eight months I ended up tearing the meniscus in my right knee due to limping and over compensating. Your meniscus is the soft cushy tendon that your knee cap sits in, I ended up having to get a chunk an inch in length taken out and having to stitch up another two spots. The original break took six months before I could put weight on it, and a year total before I could walk again, I also has to learn how to walk again. The meniscus surgery took another three months to heal. Its been a year and a half since I fell off that ladder and ive since had three seperate surgeries. Im currently awaiting another one as well to get the remaining five screws taken out because theyre coming loose, I can literally wrap my fingertips around them because theyre protruding that far out from my leg. Anyways the whole ordeal took a huge toll on me, I now have severe ptsd as well as nightmares and flash backs. Shortly after I had surgery on my right knee meniscus I found out the surgeon who did the surgery actually botched it and shaved off a piece of my knee cap. He didnt want to admit to it so he told my workmans comp case manager that I was okay to go back to work. I could barely stand up let alone go back to painting, and since workmans comp wouldnt pay for a therapist or pain pills, which I desperately needed, I started self medicating. I ended up getting pulled over snd arrested for possession of a marijuana edible and thc wax. Thats bad enough since both of those are felonies, but my arresting officers decided to loe about the amount I had so I ended up being charged with 17 grams of wax and 14 grams of marijuana edibles even though I only had wax residue in a silicone container and one tiny little marijuana gummy. Because of that I was looking at fifty years in prison, I was being charged with manufacturing and intent to distribute. I was being charged with two class 2A felonies, which is right underneath a murder charge. Anyways after about five months, a $3,500 dollar bail fee, and another $5,000 for one of the best lawyers in the country, I finally got sentenced. I must have at least one guardian angel because somehow I ended up getting the edible dropped completely, and the wax got dropped to a misdemeanor with two years probation. Now my anxiety was already bad because of my leg, but for those five months my anxiety went through the roof like the glass elevator in charlie and the choclate factory. Now that the backstory is explained I can get to the real reason of this post, ever since I got out of jail ive been having troubles breathing. I also started having panic attacks, ive since come to be able to control the panic attacks for the most part but im still having troubles breathing, even when im not having a panic attack. It just feels like im not getting enough breath, or enough oxygen, like a shortness of breath. Im almost positive thats just anxiety but sometimes when im trying to fall asleep, out of nowhere even though ive been breathing, it will feel like I haven't been, ill just stop breathing. I get this sudden wave of panic in my chest and my heart rate skyrockets for a second. It all happens out of nowhere and it only lasts for a second. I normally just take a voluntary breath and it stops it. But it still freaks me out, it doesnt happen that often though and sonce its so short lived and far inbetween I dont think its sleep apnea, plus I dont snore. I remember it happening once about two months after I broke my leg but it never happened again until I got out of jail so I just thought it was a freak coincidence. Normally itll happen once during the night and then it won't happen for weeks or months, but last night it happened five times in a row. Im just wondering if anyone else feels short of breath outside of a panic attack and more importantly if anyone else just stops breathing like I explained. Ive had all sorts of tests and xrays done, with different doctors, at different hospitals, and they all say its anxiety, but I need to know if other people experience it before I believe that. Please someone tell me they do too.

fixmybrokenmind
10-21-2016, 06:36 PM
Wow I am so sorry what you went through it almost makes me wonder where my problem is. I have problems breathing sometimes and I would absolutely say it is anxiety judging by what you have been through! You are incredibly strong

Aka_Hobbes
10-21-2016, 07:00 PM
Yea breaking my leg was pretty bad, ill never be the same again thats for sure, and for that whole five months I was going to court I thought I was going to spend most of my life, or at least ten/twenty years in prison, so I was an absolute mess. And sadly those two combined dont even come close to what the rest of my life was like before that. Honestly breaking my leg going through those legal issues have changed my life completely for the better. Breaking my leg forced me to rethink my life choices, I mean I fell thirty feet onto concrete, I couldve very easily died that day. Or at the very least I couldve broke my neck or back. I got a second chance at life that day and ever since then ive completely changed the way I live mine. Aside from wanting to be proud of my life when I die, I now how a time limit on how long ill be able to do manual labor jobs for a living. So I quit my job making $12 an hour and now I am my own boss. I just made $2,000 in three days painting the outside of someones house and now im painting the inside for another $,1750 that will take around three/four days. My goal is to make enough money to start my own business so I dont have to do manual labor, I really dont have a choice because my surgeon and physical therapists told me ill have arthritis from the knee down by time im 25 and I wont be able to work manual labor jobs by time im 30. It already hurts so much on the daily. So breaking my leg was a blessing disguised as a tragedy, im also getting a $75,000-100,000 settlement I can use to flip houses and have my own painting/construction business. Im thinking of naming it Break A Leg Construction haha. And going to jail because of drugs has helped a lot too because before I was hooked on pain pills and marijuana/wax. Obviously I wasnt addicted to thc but my ptsd and flashbacks were so severe I was high all the time trying to not feel the way I did. Now that im on probation im completely clean and I wouldnt change it if I could. Honestly the main reason why im worried its not anxiety is because I have a lot going for myself and im not really that high strung anymore. Im actually pretty blessed and I know it. So it freaks me out that all of this is happening because I feel like anxiety should only exist during high stress situations, but im happier than I have been in a long time aside from my bad days so I just dont understand why I habe anxiety, thats why I dont think I do.

Teafrenzy
10-21-2016, 07:30 PM
Nice story Hobbes.

You don't need to feel "anxious" to have anxiety. It seems like a bit of an oxymoron. But it's true.

I have PTSD and panic attacks as well as some general Anxiety. When I first came down with symptoms, I felt light headed and tired all the time. But I felt very happy, not the least bit anxious or depressed. I assumed I had come down with anemia, which happens due to my other medical condition, Crohn's disease.

After getting tested and taking B12 and Iron supplements, I realized It wasn't my Crohn's and I wasn't getting any better. Then I started getting anxious over what it could be. I naturally feared the worst. Then my symptoms started getting worse and I had the full fledged panic attacks.

So yes you can feel anxiety without any wave of panic or fear.

Aka_Hobbes
10-21-2016, 07:53 PM
Hey tea thanks for replying, so you think its possible to have trouble breathing a good chunk of the day close to every day if the anxiety is severe enough? Up until recently I was having panic attacks almost every day so thats why I say severe. And im sorry to hear you have crohns, a buddy of mine has it pretty bad, I cant imagine how hard it must be for you.

Teafrenzy
10-21-2016, 11:15 PM
Thanks Hobbes,

Luckily my Crohn's is in remission. But yeah it makes things worse. Crohn's is a physical disease so I do worry if I feel sick if it's my Crohn's or part of my anxiety disorder? And of course I worry about Crohn's constantly.

But yes, assuming you went to a GP for the breathing problem and he checked you out and you are ok, I'd 100% assume it's anxiety causing the breathing problem. The best thing to do is take anti-anxiety measures and see if you notice any improvement with the breathing.

In my worst state, I had 6 panic attacks per day. So cheer up.

Aka_Hobbes
10-21-2016, 11:34 PM
Jesus six panic attacks a day, the most ive ever had was three in a day but that wasnt every day. But im glad your crohns is in remission, I can see why youd be so worried about it. I cant even imagine having crohns because im already a hypochondriac, ever time I got a sore throat id freak out and wonder if it was my crohns or not. But with the way technology is evolving hopefully theyll invent a cure within your life time, the rate of evolution for technologys only going to keep increasing like a snowball effect so I dont see why it wont be possible eventually. By GP do you mean like just a normal doctor? Because I havent gone to any specialists but ive had oxygen level tests and chest x-rays and they say my lungs are fine, ive even been hooked up to an EKG while I was having a panic attack, which is the same as having a stress EKG test where you run on a treadmill while hooked up to an EKG machine to increase your heart rate, and they say my hearts fine too. So im hoping its just anxiety but its scary because sometimes it can last for days at a time. Although it never bothers me when im at work and im a painter so ill be running up and down ladders all day so if it was something more serious with my heart or lungs I feel like it would get worse and not better with activity. It has to be anxiety, that would explain why it gets better with activity, because I focus on working instead of dying lol.

Teafrenzy
10-22-2016, 02:41 PM
Yeah, GP= General Practioner, kind of like a "family doctor". Basically the first person you see when you feel sick.

If you have had those tests and came clean then it's 99% likely to be anxiety. At first I didn't believe I had anxiety. I thought I had picked up an obscure disease that didn't show up on standard blood tests, like Lyme disease. After a change to diet and exercise and supplements and therapy all designed to relieve anxiety, I have noticed a decrease in symptoms, reassuring me that it is just anxiety.

If working helps you feel better, than it really should be anxiety.

FruitSalad
10-22-2016, 03:28 PM
Hi Hobbes,

This is from my own experience, do what you will with this information my friend.

I'm new here. Like you my anxiety symptoms came on somewhat suddenly after my body collapsed, I will spare you the details for now. What I have found in my 2 year recovery since then is interesting. I too had shortness of breath. First, let's understand what glands can cause Anxiety... ADRENALS, they sit on top of your kidneys. Sir, you have been through A LOT of stress, I would assume your kidneys are hurt pretty bad, not to mention possible damaged to the kidney and or adrenal on your broken leg side (possible). Please keep in mind, when you have loss of breath this can very well be neurologically related, your nervous system will be sore to say the least one would think. Also prison food is not known to be very healthy. I healed myself and continue to heal through diet and an understanding of the Lymphatic system. You can see Robert Morse on You tube for more information on such things, he really showed me some things I needed to know.

Here's something to start with. Go and get your creatinine levels tested too see how your kidneys are doing -- over worked kidneys = bad adrenals = anxiety (in my experience). Check your blood pressure numbers, they will give great indication of the current load. The upper is your adrenal, and your lower is your kidney, I test both sides on myself. Feel free to PM me if you have questions.

For creatinine levels, look up a site called Grapegate, in Canada we use eGFR for kidneys. I went from around 70 if I remember correctly to over 100 now. It's been quite an ride.

God Bless you,
Dan