Alpha
09-15-2016, 12:40 AM
Hello everyone,
I'm writing this to share my journey with you on how I overcame anxiety and mild depression.
I underlined the important information at the bottom. The middle is just my story and to show you guys that I had anxiety.
I started having anxiety when I was 21 years old and I am not currently anxiety free at the age of 25 going on 26 soon. I'm going to tell you my personal journey and hopefully it truly helps many of you.
Now I started off with anxiety by actually falling on the floor when I was 21 years old because of the lack of oxygen to my brain. For some reason I was sitting on the couch totally relaxed then I decided to get up really fast which made me feel light headed. Instead of stopping, I actually proceeded to walk and then I just collapsed. After that I had a panic attack. At the time I didn't know what it was and that is how my anxiety got created. I went to the hospital feeling cold in which I was in the hospital for a few days and the doctors didn't know what happened to me.
This made me feel even more weird and uncomfortable and untrusting with myself. Later the doctors couldn't diagnose me and blamed it on my muscle supplements at the time. However, they truly didn't know what it was that caused me to feel the way I was feeling. They sent me home perfectly fine. But for me, I wasn't perfectly fine. Now I was untrusting of myself and my body, thinking "what if I collapse when I'm driving, what if i collapse when I'm walking again". What's even more weird is that my body always felt imbalanced. I couldn't walk straight as I kept feeling like I was going to fall.
This basically created anxiety. I was uncomfortable with life, I had frequent panic attacks which made me scared of walking in public as I always felt I was going to fall. Then my anxiety got worse as I started feeling insecure about myself. In which many of you probably can relate on that part, but I'll touch there a little bit more. I started basically becoming untrusting of my body. Later my thoughts would take a dramatic turn. Simple everyday thoughts of hurting myself or someone made me feel extremely uncomfortable. I started thinking I was going mad. And what's worse was my mind consistently playing these thoguhts as I couldn't stop it. I googled insanity to psychotic trying to see if there was a relation of me going mad. It got the point that I was afraid to watch scarey movies as I thought I would become the killer in a movie.
My mind went from basically having regular bad ideas to actually thinking I can BECOME them. Now, not only did anxiety make me feel this way I started actually becoming depressed because I thought I was going to be trapped in this loop hole of thinking. I was thinking I will be stuck with these obsessive thoughts that I cannot defeat and for the rest of my life i would be like this. I was battling it everyday trying to find an answer or solution in which google couldnt provide neither could talking to people about it as no one understood.
So as time passed I was afraid to be around people. So I put myself in malls and by a lot of people to fight it. This only made it worse as I just couldn't take it. I even lost my jobs because my jobs had to be around people in the retail world. My bosses didn't understand even when I spoke to them about it. I actually got to the point of quitting my jobs and trying to find other positions. My bosses provided solutions as seeing a psychologist. At this point of life I was out of answers and didn't know what to do.
So I took their advice and saught a psychologist. The lady told me that everything I was feeling was normal , I seemed ok. But I thought maybe I was just acting ok around here to not be diagnosed with something worse. Imagine telling yourself or owning up to being crazy when you're not. Worst thing is, that you will become that when truthfully you never was. So that actually freaked me out.
As time passed I had serious anxiety attacks even in my house. I would be home alone and feel this dark void within me, feeling very weak and a very dark energy to the point I was on my knees on the floor. I actually had to leave the house to get a breath of fresh air.
So at this point of life I didn't want to go on any prescriptions and I didn't know what to do. My psychologist told me I was fine, but believe me I wasn't. The only thing I started doing was praying. No word of a lie, I prayed. I continued to pray everyday even when I was in the loop and it didn't seem to light up. There were times I would cry because I thought I would be stuck, but I continued to pray.
Right when my anxiety was at it's worse where this dark void was within me and at this time i know it wa sbecoming something more like depression I truly needed an answer. Then I met this woman online. We spoke and had a conversation and it developed into something more. Everytime I spoke to her i felt at ease with life. When I didn't speak to her and was alone I felt the feelings come back.
As time passed me and this lady developed a relationship and The feelings of emptiness were also gone.
I'm 25 now and the anxiety is completely gone.
Now how I was able to break through was through love. No word of a lie, if it wasn't for my wife I would probably be in a very low state in life.
Anxiety is a stepping stone in a way of self discovery. As bad as the journey is, when you overcome it you will see what it is suppose to truly teach you. Now when I get anxiety i use them as warning signals. For instance when I use to feel uncomfortable around a certain person I use to obsess over it and try to fight it which made my anxiety worse. Now I use it as a warning signal, that that person isn't any good for me. And 9 times out of 10 when I listened to my feelings they became true as that person. It can also apply to groups or even jobs. Some of you get anxiety from work. I want to ask you, have you ever thought the job you are doing isn't right for you and thats the reason you have anxiety? Certain jobs I did gave me ridiculous amount of anxiety, and others I felt completely comfortable.
So I learned to use anxiety to develop my intuition. You see when we are in an uncomfortable place and we start feeling uncomfortable we can then obsess over it in which anxiety is created. But for me, what I learned is when I feel uncomfortable I'm in the right place with the right people. When I feel uncomfortable, it's the wrong place and the wrong people. Now if your anxiety makes you feel uncomfortable no matter who you are around, I personally think you're going through a spiritual development phase. It's a process of self discovery and the reason you have anxiety is because you never dealt with this type of perception on life. But believe me, once you overcome it, it will be hard to go back because now you'll be aware on how to manage it.
So through this journey I learned to be more comfortable with who I am, and to fit myself in the right places with the right people. I overcame my anxiety because my wife helped me due to love.
The cure is people and perception. You need the right people in your life to make you feel at ease, and you need the right perception. Here are also a couple of thinking tips. When your mind is cought in a loop. Embrace the loop and go with it, but remember to remind yourself it's going to crash and you wont be stuck in it for ever. If your mind can't stop the loop you're in a spiritual development and embracing a new perception on life to over come it. Your mind should be capable of when you think of something bad, you shake it off real fast. Or when you feel anxiety you quickly acknowledge it and cease it by being aware of it, and whats to come. Basically prepping yourself for the wave. As time goes on, you learn to manage it, and to over come it.
I'm a strong believer of prayer, so perhaps many of you now have the opportunity to achieve spiritual awareness in this time of your life. Whether it's depression or anxiety it's basically a spiritual development. The thing you're missing is someone and a perception. If you ever notice you go to a psychologist to obtain a new perception. And if you can't achieve that perception you get provided a prescription until so. Anxiety and depression depends on 2 things. Having the right people in your life and the right perception. We are basically walking perspectives. And if you have the wrong ideas about life which develop into a perception, it can create anxiety, and depression. You have to have the right perceptive, and the right people.
My cure was also prayer, because if it wasn't for the right woman at the right time for my personality I probably would of taking the prescription side until I met the right perspective and person.
How I prayed if any of you are wondering is basically I told my guardians and the divine some of you call it God, others call it other labels. I basically prayed and told it to deliver the right person in my life or help fill the void that I have with the right person, perception, or career. I had money at the time but I had no one, and now I have no money and I have someone and I have no anxiety. So what I learned was I needed someone and luckily that person was delivered the way I prayed.
Prayers works from my experience and are very powerful. Just remain consistent with your prayers and it will come. What ever it is out there it exist and it takes time but your guardians and the divine and what ever is playing apart of the universe will organize it for you at the right moment.
The key points are perceptions and people. The right perception delivers the right people. And the right people help deliver and enforce those perceptions. Just remember that.
If you have any questions feel free to ask. Hopefully this sums it up.
I'm writing this to share my journey with you on how I overcame anxiety and mild depression.
I underlined the important information at the bottom. The middle is just my story and to show you guys that I had anxiety.
I started having anxiety when I was 21 years old and I am not currently anxiety free at the age of 25 going on 26 soon. I'm going to tell you my personal journey and hopefully it truly helps many of you.
Now I started off with anxiety by actually falling on the floor when I was 21 years old because of the lack of oxygen to my brain. For some reason I was sitting on the couch totally relaxed then I decided to get up really fast which made me feel light headed. Instead of stopping, I actually proceeded to walk and then I just collapsed. After that I had a panic attack. At the time I didn't know what it was and that is how my anxiety got created. I went to the hospital feeling cold in which I was in the hospital for a few days and the doctors didn't know what happened to me.
This made me feel even more weird and uncomfortable and untrusting with myself. Later the doctors couldn't diagnose me and blamed it on my muscle supplements at the time. However, they truly didn't know what it was that caused me to feel the way I was feeling. They sent me home perfectly fine. But for me, I wasn't perfectly fine. Now I was untrusting of myself and my body, thinking "what if I collapse when I'm driving, what if i collapse when I'm walking again". What's even more weird is that my body always felt imbalanced. I couldn't walk straight as I kept feeling like I was going to fall.
This basically created anxiety. I was uncomfortable with life, I had frequent panic attacks which made me scared of walking in public as I always felt I was going to fall. Then my anxiety got worse as I started feeling insecure about myself. In which many of you probably can relate on that part, but I'll touch there a little bit more. I started basically becoming untrusting of my body. Later my thoughts would take a dramatic turn. Simple everyday thoughts of hurting myself or someone made me feel extremely uncomfortable. I started thinking I was going mad. And what's worse was my mind consistently playing these thoguhts as I couldn't stop it. I googled insanity to psychotic trying to see if there was a relation of me going mad. It got the point that I was afraid to watch scarey movies as I thought I would become the killer in a movie.
My mind went from basically having regular bad ideas to actually thinking I can BECOME them. Now, not only did anxiety make me feel this way I started actually becoming depressed because I thought I was going to be trapped in this loop hole of thinking. I was thinking I will be stuck with these obsessive thoughts that I cannot defeat and for the rest of my life i would be like this. I was battling it everyday trying to find an answer or solution in which google couldnt provide neither could talking to people about it as no one understood.
So as time passed I was afraid to be around people. So I put myself in malls and by a lot of people to fight it. This only made it worse as I just couldn't take it. I even lost my jobs because my jobs had to be around people in the retail world. My bosses didn't understand even when I spoke to them about it. I actually got to the point of quitting my jobs and trying to find other positions. My bosses provided solutions as seeing a psychologist. At this point of life I was out of answers and didn't know what to do.
So I took their advice and saught a psychologist. The lady told me that everything I was feeling was normal , I seemed ok. But I thought maybe I was just acting ok around here to not be diagnosed with something worse. Imagine telling yourself or owning up to being crazy when you're not. Worst thing is, that you will become that when truthfully you never was. So that actually freaked me out.
As time passed I had serious anxiety attacks even in my house. I would be home alone and feel this dark void within me, feeling very weak and a very dark energy to the point I was on my knees on the floor. I actually had to leave the house to get a breath of fresh air.
So at this point of life I didn't want to go on any prescriptions and I didn't know what to do. My psychologist told me I was fine, but believe me I wasn't. The only thing I started doing was praying. No word of a lie, I prayed. I continued to pray everyday even when I was in the loop and it didn't seem to light up. There were times I would cry because I thought I would be stuck, but I continued to pray.
Right when my anxiety was at it's worse where this dark void was within me and at this time i know it wa sbecoming something more like depression I truly needed an answer. Then I met this woman online. We spoke and had a conversation and it developed into something more. Everytime I spoke to her i felt at ease with life. When I didn't speak to her and was alone I felt the feelings come back.
As time passed me and this lady developed a relationship and The feelings of emptiness were also gone.
I'm 25 now and the anxiety is completely gone.
Now how I was able to break through was through love. No word of a lie, if it wasn't for my wife I would probably be in a very low state in life.
Anxiety is a stepping stone in a way of self discovery. As bad as the journey is, when you overcome it you will see what it is suppose to truly teach you. Now when I get anxiety i use them as warning signals. For instance when I use to feel uncomfortable around a certain person I use to obsess over it and try to fight it which made my anxiety worse. Now I use it as a warning signal, that that person isn't any good for me. And 9 times out of 10 when I listened to my feelings they became true as that person. It can also apply to groups or even jobs. Some of you get anxiety from work. I want to ask you, have you ever thought the job you are doing isn't right for you and thats the reason you have anxiety? Certain jobs I did gave me ridiculous amount of anxiety, and others I felt completely comfortable.
So I learned to use anxiety to develop my intuition. You see when we are in an uncomfortable place and we start feeling uncomfortable we can then obsess over it in which anxiety is created. But for me, what I learned is when I feel uncomfortable I'm in the right place with the right people. When I feel uncomfortable, it's the wrong place and the wrong people. Now if your anxiety makes you feel uncomfortable no matter who you are around, I personally think you're going through a spiritual development phase. It's a process of self discovery and the reason you have anxiety is because you never dealt with this type of perception on life. But believe me, once you overcome it, it will be hard to go back because now you'll be aware on how to manage it.
So through this journey I learned to be more comfortable with who I am, and to fit myself in the right places with the right people. I overcame my anxiety because my wife helped me due to love.
The cure is people and perception. You need the right people in your life to make you feel at ease, and you need the right perception. Here are also a couple of thinking tips. When your mind is cought in a loop. Embrace the loop and go with it, but remember to remind yourself it's going to crash and you wont be stuck in it for ever. If your mind can't stop the loop you're in a spiritual development and embracing a new perception on life to over come it. Your mind should be capable of when you think of something bad, you shake it off real fast. Or when you feel anxiety you quickly acknowledge it and cease it by being aware of it, and whats to come. Basically prepping yourself for the wave. As time goes on, you learn to manage it, and to over come it.
I'm a strong believer of prayer, so perhaps many of you now have the opportunity to achieve spiritual awareness in this time of your life. Whether it's depression or anxiety it's basically a spiritual development. The thing you're missing is someone and a perception. If you ever notice you go to a psychologist to obtain a new perception. And if you can't achieve that perception you get provided a prescription until so. Anxiety and depression depends on 2 things. Having the right people in your life and the right perception. We are basically walking perspectives. And if you have the wrong ideas about life which develop into a perception, it can create anxiety, and depression. You have to have the right perceptive, and the right people.
My cure was also prayer, because if it wasn't for the right woman at the right time for my personality I probably would of taking the prescription side until I met the right perspective and person.
How I prayed if any of you are wondering is basically I told my guardians and the divine some of you call it God, others call it other labels. I basically prayed and told it to deliver the right person in my life or help fill the void that I have with the right person, perception, or career. I had money at the time but I had no one, and now I have no money and I have someone and I have no anxiety. So what I learned was I needed someone and luckily that person was delivered the way I prayed.
Prayers works from my experience and are very powerful. Just remain consistent with your prayers and it will come. What ever it is out there it exist and it takes time but your guardians and the divine and what ever is playing apart of the universe will organize it for you at the right moment.
The key points are perceptions and people. The right perception delivers the right people. And the right people help deliver and enforce those perceptions. Just remember that.
If you have any questions feel free to ask. Hopefully this sums it up.