AJ89
09-11-2016, 10:43 PM
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Hello everyone,
I am sure a lot of people have written about this topic before, but I feel like I need to vent. This is my 2nd semester as an MPH student and I had moved 2 hours away from home to a completely new city where I don't know anyone. I have terrible anxiety and have been extremely depressed since moving away from my family and friends. The first semester went great. I was only a part time student because they could not offer more classes in the summer and I got to go back home every weekend since I had a lot of free time. I got all A's and overall the professors were helpful and the courses were was easy, so everything was good. However, now I am a full time student and my classes require a lot more work and studying so I do not visit home very often anymore. Also as I mentioned earlier, I have terrible anxiety and I am completely terrified of failing my classes even though this is only my 4th week of class and there is no indication of me failing yet. I attend every class, ask my TA's and professors questions about homework assignments and class materials to the point where I feel like I annoy them. However, sometimes I get extremely depressed for days to the point were I don't do anything at all. I had 4 days off during labor day weekend and barely did any readings or studying and now I feel like my work and studies are piling up. Then my anxiety kicks back in and I become terrified of failing and I study all day to the point where I burn myself out. Its a vicious cycle and I am literally having nightmares about failing my classes while sleeping. Even when I visit home (which is once every month now or on holidays) I am still depressed, anxious, and feel like utter crap because I know I have to go back to an empty apartment, and so I don't even enjoy going back to visit home anymore. It was to the point were my mother saw me crying and wanted me to skip my Monday class so I can stay home for an extra day.
I try to be social as much as I can and interact with my classmates. I go to events, libraries, and zumba/gym classes so I don't have to be stuck alone all day. However, it does not help at all. I still feel terrible and start crying because I feel like I want to quit to go back home. I am not used to being far away from family and have always interacted with my friends on a weekly basis. I only have a year left to graduate and I know time flies, so I don't want to give up either and I know ALOT of people that would want to be in my position right now. But I also feel so isolated and alone here and I don't know if I am doomed to fail especially since the lowest passing grade is a B-.
I can't afford counseling at the moment and I really don't want to go on any meds. I also just came down with the flu, so Im completely freaking out because I know Im going to be down this entire week and I'm just going to fall behind even more. Everyone says my feelings are normal and it will go away with time, but I am also afraid that it is going to have a bad effect on my school performance. I don't if anyone has any advice or past experience that can help, but if you do please let me know. :/
Thank you!
Hello everyone,
I am sure a lot of people have written about this topic before, but I feel like I need to vent. This is my 2nd semester as an MPH student and I had moved 2 hours away from home to a completely new city where I don't know anyone. I have terrible anxiety and have been extremely depressed since moving away from my family and friends. The first semester went great. I was only a part time student because they could not offer more classes in the summer and I got to go back home every weekend since I had a lot of free time. I got all A's and overall the professors were helpful and the courses were was easy, so everything was good. However, now I am a full time student and my classes require a lot more work and studying so I do not visit home very often anymore. Also as I mentioned earlier, I have terrible anxiety and I am completely terrified of failing my classes even though this is only my 4th week of class and there is no indication of me failing yet. I attend every class, ask my TA's and professors questions about homework assignments and class materials to the point where I feel like I annoy them. However, sometimes I get extremely depressed for days to the point were I don't do anything at all. I had 4 days off during labor day weekend and barely did any readings or studying and now I feel like my work and studies are piling up. Then my anxiety kicks back in and I become terrified of failing and I study all day to the point where I burn myself out. Its a vicious cycle and I am literally having nightmares about failing my classes while sleeping. Even when I visit home (which is once every month now or on holidays) I am still depressed, anxious, and feel like utter crap because I know I have to go back to an empty apartment, and so I don't even enjoy going back to visit home anymore. It was to the point were my mother saw me crying and wanted me to skip my Monday class so I can stay home for an extra day.
I try to be social as much as I can and interact with my classmates. I go to events, libraries, and zumba/gym classes so I don't have to be stuck alone all day. However, it does not help at all. I still feel terrible and start crying because I feel like I want to quit to go back home. I am not used to being far away from family and have always interacted with my friends on a weekly basis. I only have a year left to graduate and I know time flies, so I don't want to give up either and I know ALOT of people that would want to be in my position right now. But I also feel so isolated and alone here and I don't know if I am doomed to fail especially since the lowest passing grade is a B-.
I can't afford counseling at the moment and I really don't want to go on any meds. I also just came down with the flu, so Im completely freaking out because I know Im going to be down this entire week and I'm just going to fall behind even more. Everyone says my feelings are normal and it will go away with time, but I am also afraid that it is going to have a bad effect on my school performance. I don't if anyone has any advice or past experience that can help, but if you do please let me know. :/
Thank you!