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KarmaKaze
07-14-2016, 01:04 PM
Hey everybody, you can call me KarmaKaze. I'm a 15 year old who has health related anxiety and panic disorder as well as OCD. I've been dealing with mild panic attacks and anxiety since I was 11 years old, but in August of 2014 everything changed for me. Although I'm sober now, back then I was experimenting with smoking and drinking without any anxiety whatsoever. That is until one night when I smoked some extremely potent marijuana and when I was caught by my step sister it sent me into a full fledged panic attack. My heart was pounding and I could see images when I closed my eyes. I remember screaming and yanking a phone out of my step sister's hand and calling myself an ambulance. When the ambulance came my heart was beating at 175 bpm when I was laying down, and they had to put me on oxygen and morphine. Even being heavily sedated I was told that I was screaming in the hospital because I thought that I was dying. I don't remember anything else from that night other than being drug tested and I woke up in my bed with my hospital bracelet still on my wrist, extremely groggy for the next two days. Since then I've had intermittent panic attacks where I feel the exact same way I did that night, as well as a host of other symptoms such as uncontrollable shaking and HPPD (the HPPD has since gone away). Since the incident in August they didn't really happen frequently again until May of 2016, I'm not quite sure what happened to me but since May I've been an extreme hypochondriac, and the worst part is my anxiety gives me symptoms that feel extremely real, like dizziness and numb sensations in my body. I've been told I'm healthy by several doctors, but it seems like every time I manage to get one symptom to go away I get a new one. I think what may have caused the surge in anxiety is the fact that one of my coping mechanisms before was to tell myself that when I felt weird it was probably just anxiety and it couldn't hurt me, and I was thinking about the fact that if I was having a real medical emergency I might pass it off as just anxiety because my anxiety related symptoms feel just as real. Anyway that's my anxiety in a nutshell and I'm looking forward to the possible support I can get here. I'm looking forward to meeting all of you!