anxiety over job offer

[hennypenny]

I had a job offer today for a job I really don't want to take. The problem is that we really need my income and its the best offer I've had. I am currently in what I feel is a full blown panic attack, heart palpitations and severe stomach cramps and nausea....this is the second time I have had this happen over a job that I didnt want to take. The last time I lasted 3 days into the job and then my husband asked me to quit because I was struggling to function. I don't know what to do. If I turn it down, we are back to financial hardship, if I take it will I just keep going downhill?

[Anne1221]

What is it about the job that makes you feel sick about taking it?

[hennypenny]

I thought I was applying to run a museum gift shop (I'm educated in museum studies and have retail experience) in the interview it was revealed that the gift shop is really more of a model train shop and that they have no interest in selling to the local customer but to their huge model train following with an online store. Its all about a product I know nothing about and have no interest in.

I keep trying to calm down, but every time I think about accepting this job tomorrow a wave of nausea roles through me and my heart starts to pound again

[snowberry]

Anne is right in that you should question what is making you feel so sick about it, but you need to go further than that - why is selling a product you have no knowledge or interest in so catastrophic? Don't many people do the same thing for a living each day? So what is it about that that you fear? Think on that question and you might begin to understand what's upsetting you here.

But ultimately, you need to keep the following in mind:

1.) I do not have to enjoy or have any real interest in my job to be successful at it.
2.) I am not bound by blood into this role. I can quit any time I want.
3.) There may be enjoyable parts of the job that make it bearable.
4.) There are billions of people working jobs they have no interest in every day, and I am just another. I am not in a terrible, godawful position that few are ever put into, I am merely dealing with a fact of life. And if the job really is horrible, I will refer back to number 2.

Good luck and let us know how you get on! Make it your goal to learn lots of stuff about the trains and report back to us in the comments.

[Anne1221]

Good advice by Snowberry. I would say a large majority of people work in a job they have no interest in. But don't let your anxiety tell you that you can't do it, until you at least give it a try.

[hennypenny]

Thank you both, I had to give an answer yesterday, my anxiety won out and I declined. Now I feel very regretful because I know my reasons were irrational. I made a doctors appointment today. My husband is being really supportive but we need me to work and this is the best offer we've received so far (and I've been looking for a while) I'm so incredibly frustrated with myself.

[encourager101]

Thanks for being willing to share with us. I am glad your husband is being supportive and that you are going to see a doctor. Let us know how it goes! Hang in there!

[hennypenny]

The doctor prescribed an anti-anxiety med for short term to help settle me down, as now I'm a wreck about money and guilt. I have looked into our benefits for counseling and am getting that set up next week. I am trying to let go of the job lost over this, but its so hard because we are so tight financially and I am embarrassed about being unemployed. When I can reign in my thoughts, I am focused on counseling so that the next time I will not go down this path. Thank you all for giving a stranger such wonderful support!

[encourager101]

Glad to hear it, thanks for sharing! Hang in there! ♥♥♥

[Anne1221]

Don't feel guilty about not taking that job. I took a job that was a huge step up but it took a toll on me. Two people before me quit it, but I stuck it out until my health took a bad decline. If it was making you that sick just thinking about it, it was probably not a good fit. You may have to take something that is not stressful, but not interesting or exciting just to get a paycheck. I've had to do that before but it is hard to not be interested. However, lots of people out there do it every day. As far as finding a job, just keep plugging away and don't give up. I had to help my brother look for a job on craigslist, because he had given up. I got him some job interviews but then someone he knew gave him a job. The key is to keep on looking until you find something.