silkflowers
06-09-2016, 01:32 PM
I also posted this on reddit but there aren't many people following that section so I haven't received an answer or advice.
So, there's this thing that's really hard to handle. I was diagnosed with social anxiety 2 years ago (now 16 years old). This illness controls my body almost completely. Not rarely do I happen to have some weird behaviour of which I'm not aware of until it's too late, talking about strange looks, or things I wanted to say and turned wrong or misunderstood. I didn't really enjoy my childhood (if I can say so, wasn't abused but not normal either), and maximum stress came once with the final exams in 8th grade. That's when I fucked up. I passed the exams, but after that the basic shyness turned to this. High school. I decided that I need to take a break from life, I just didn't worry about anything (strange for smb with anxiety, but who has it maybe knows) like grades, friends, the way I look etc. I just let things happen. 8 out of 10 would be already a great grade for me then.
Everything because anxiety. I believe that mind and body are totally different, and yes, it's possible that we act without thinking, completely independent from the mind. I prefer to judge people for the way they think rather than their actions - that very first thought that comes in someone's mind is what defines them. Later actions don't speak as much.
At least for people who can't control themselves very well. I may sound stupid and I may be stupid, but at the moment I don't expect anything. I just want to remain alive and it's ok.
So, there's this thing that's really hard to handle. I was diagnosed with social anxiety 2 years ago (now 16 years old). This illness controls my body almost completely. Not rarely do I happen to have some weird behaviour of which I'm not aware of until it's too late, talking about strange looks, or things I wanted to say and turned wrong or misunderstood. I didn't really enjoy my childhood (if I can say so, wasn't abused but not normal either), and maximum stress came once with the final exams in 8th grade. That's when I fucked up. I passed the exams, but after that the basic shyness turned to this. High school. I decided that I need to take a break from life, I just didn't worry about anything (strange for smb with anxiety, but who has it maybe knows) like grades, friends, the way I look etc. I just let things happen. 8 out of 10 would be already a great grade for me then.
Everything because anxiety. I believe that mind and body are totally different, and yes, it's possible that we act without thinking, completely independent from the mind. I prefer to judge people for the way they think rather than their actions - that very first thought that comes in someone's mind is what defines them. Later actions don't speak as much.
At least for people who can't control themselves very well. I may sound stupid and I may be stupid, but at the moment I don't expect anything. I just want to remain alive and it's ok.