Overactive mind

[Vibeycnt93]

Hi guys, this is my first post the first time Ive decided to do something about my anxiety so I hope this will be beneficial for me.

Basically ive come to realise over the last 12 months that I don't think the same way as most people, I over analyse EVERYTHING. Its a cycle of thinking that I have had for the past 4/5 years or so and I only noticed it in the last 12 months. Its something I battle with everyday and when its bad it zaps all my energy, Its absolutely draining. If I'm playing a match I'm already thinking about getting hurt/a bad tackle which impacts my performance which in turn affects my confidence which then heightens my nervousness/worry. Its a viscous cycle. And that's just one example.

If my car makes a weird sound, I straight away jump to the conclusion that its going to break down in the middle of town and I'm going to have to get a new car! This sends me into a state of anxiousness, all for no reason.

If I'm in work I am thinking about a completely irrelevant situation that has nothing to do with my job, I cant just do my work and stop thinking. People say that when they walk past me, they can see that something is on my mind.

The worst thing about all this is that it affects my relationships with women! They seem to be the biggest worry. I analyse every little interaction I have with the person I am seeing and look at it from 100 different angles before I come to my own evaluation of the situation. "She defo thinks this" or "shes lieing" seem to be the stand out thoughts in my head. If I'm texting someone, I'm anxious the whole time, the time between texts is spent worrying. I'm sitting on my bed waiting to hear my phone go off. And if I don't get anything back within 5 mins, I systematically check my phone every few minutes. I read into texts way too much. Its absolutely pathetic.

I was seeing a girl in week for a few weeks and due to my overthinking and anxiety I messed things up. I now have to see her in work everyday and my anxiety is off the charts. I cant even speak because my head is going a 100mph over and over.

Can anyone relate to this kind of thinking? Its having an affect on my life at this stage.

I would greatly appreciate someones help or advise

thanks

[AsHellRetreats]

Hey man, I can only speak to what has worked for me. Natural supplements. Total turnaround on my anxious mind. Specifically magnesium (I take 200mg daily) vitamin D (5000 iu daily) milk thistle (2000 mg daily) cod liver oil, vitamin b complex and a product called cortisol manager. These things have absolutely changed my life. I feel like the old care free person I used to be. Good luck

[David J Sullivan]

Liar
Every day I wake up to hear the screaming of my children, I feel guilty as my wife has to go to them and feed them. As I wake up I play with my phone as yes it does get me excited, a little joy sparked inside me as I download a new app! I know it’s stupid and selfish and I know my children do need some attention but, that leaves my head. My thoughtless, self-centred brain switches on and I look for a new app! Then, I think how much Wife gets sad if things are messy or not done around the house. I rush into getting them ready and my head goes into thoughtless mode. I often miss something like a shoe or even loose some socks. Usually I do something “half a job” and this upsets Wife. I don’t listen it should be done a certain way and I just forget. I sometimes hit my head hard after I haven’t done something because I want to make my brain wake up and listen!! I want to do it right! I usually leave the house with guilt as I’ve done something to make them upset or made Wife day harder, I have usually done something have heartedly and not thought about it. I do try so hard! I’m just selfish and thoughtless. As I walk to the train I hear a message go off in my pocket, my heart sinks as I Know I’ve done something stupid again. And I know I am self-pitying right now but, I have to write it down as its killing me inside. I am just about to break! The message usually reads something like “You used my towel again! Yours was in the bathroom on the floor ready for you” Something so stupid, but I feel I’ve let her down again! I just feel selfish and thoughtless. I know I am hard work, everyone says it even in two places I’ve worked “your wife must be a saint to put up with you” .Even my Mum has said you wouldn’t ever find anybody else who could put up with you. I know…… She is a saint anyone who has to talk to me are saints, anyone who has to work with me are saints! I know this! I am just hard work, a disaster waiting to happen. As I get into work the only thing that is on my head is…. What have I done today to upset someone (I know this is very ego centric, but it’s always true). Even to the point of leaving doors open, my brain switches off and I plunge into a world of thoughtlessness! I try so hard to get what is needed done. I think the best way to explain it is. My brain is fighting between thoughts. Everything enters my brain but gets lost and muddled. This leads to my actions being either slow or non-existent. I feel this does have an impact on the children I teach as at times things do get overwhelming and my brain just stops! I can’t explain it any other way, this then results in annoying people (the welsh advisor for example). I don’t mean to seem unprofessional and as if I haven’t listened, I am not lazy! Thinking is hard for me, even when I am with my friends I prefer to walk alone when they are all talking, I can’t take it all in. And then I end up blurting out something stupid because I want to be noticed. I know this is ridiculous but I have to get it out! I am always disappointing or letting down everyone around me. I let down people in work, and Wife… Wife, how the hell does she put up with me??? I leave things all over the house; she has to look after the kids and me! I do nothing, pathetic! When I do, do something it’s usually half-hearted and I do something stupid because I haven’t listened. Lately I was talking to a friend about the garden and I was supposed to tell him he had to finish it as we had paid him. I lied to my wife, which I am so ashamed of. I just didn’t want to lose him as a friend as he was very similar to me in his thinking. I was hinting to him rather than telling him straight. Wife read my phone messages and found this out, she shouted at me and said I was a liar and she couldn’t trust me. Why couldn’t I just tell her, maybe I was embarrassed, ashamed that I could not do it. I was trying to save her the hassle of this by doing it myself as I know she was stressed at the moment. But, she was right it wasn’t because of this it was so I could look good to others that “I” saved the day and got all the attention. I can see why I am untrustworthy, I will eat a chocolate bar when she is not around and this is not right! Its sneaky! And IT HAS TO STOP!!!!! Last night we had a couple of drinks, when she had gone to bed, I had two more cans! I just wanted to be alone with my thoughts and alcohol does help my thoughts slow down, but she counted the cans the next morning and shouted at me, that money could be spent on the family and she’s right……. How could I be so selfish! What was going through my head???? I had to go to work tomorrow and I knew someone would shout at me, I didn’t want the evening to stop. I spent the evening looking at old photos and remembering how life was so easy. That is such a ridiculous, self-pitying way of looking at things. I avoid everyone at the moment in school I don’t dare venture to the staff room as I know I will annoy someone. I just say things and don’t think and I end up pissing people off! We went on a school trip the other day and I forgot the first aid kit another teacher shouted at me in front of the other kids “it doesn’t have legs and walk away”. I just annoy people and lack common sense!