dudedude2
01-07-2016, 04:09 PM
Hey guys,
Haven't been to this forum in a while, even forgot my previous credentials haha.
A bit of my background: pretty bad social anxiety during the childhood (not being able to talk to a cashier, ask for a pen, etc.), a bit better in my early teens (unpredicted situations still bothered me a loooot), kinda alright later - by the age of 19 I thought I was a pretty well functioning individual. I'm twenty now and I've realized now that my anxiety ain't gone - far from that.
We were having a dinner with some friends and one of them told us about how she kissed a random guy in a club; I liked her, quite a bit, but I just made a joke about it, we finished our dinner, I went home... fell on the floor trying to cry but not being able to, threw stuff at walls, I was nearly ripping my hair out. I was desperate. The following several months could be summed up to me being pretty depressed (not leaving my room, not being able to sleep or talk to people (fear), swinging in my chair for hours just thinking about all the events that I regard as negative from my past (even early childhood), stuff like that).
All because of one thing - I am not able to express my feelings, it's impossible for me to show that I value someone more than others (in a positive sense, I have no problem showing I dislike an individual).
Since then I've been taking various supplements - phenibut at first, but these pills proved to be incredibly addictive with awful withdrawal, so after a break I switched to l-theanine, htp-5, l-tyrosine, and magnesium+B6.
Long story short, how do I make a move, how do I show someone how I feel about them? You can't imagined how many times girls were in my room perhaps waiting for something to happen but leaving at least slightly disappointed...
And this thought is driving me crazy, my anxiety manifests itself more and more with all the symptoms I nearly forgot about years ago. What do I do??
Recently, another girl has openly told me she likes me a lot and that we should go out together, guess if anything happened? I'm even afraid to admit to myself that I might be actually interested in it.
Thanks for listening (:, I just wanted to share my feelings and perhaps get some advice.
P.S. I have no money for a therapist unfortunately...
Haven't been to this forum in a while, even forgot my previous credentials haha.
A bit of my background: pretty bad social anxiety during the childhood (not being able to talk to a cashier, ask for a pen, etc.), a bit better in my early teens (unpredicted situations still bothered me a loooot), kinda alright later - by the age of 19 I thought I was a pretty well functioning individual. I'm twenty now and I've realized now that my anxiety ain't gone - far from that.
We were having a dinner with some friends and one of them told us about how she kissed a random guy in a club; I liked her, quite a bit, but I just made a joke about it, we finished our dinner, I went home... fell on the floor trying to cry but not being able to, threw stuff at walls, I was nearly ripping my hair out. I was desperate. The following several months could be summed up to me being pretty depressed (not leaving my room, not being able to sleep or talk to people (fear), swinging in my chair for hours just thinking about all the events that I regard as negative from my past (even early childhood), stuff like that).
All because of one thing - I am not able to express my feelings, it's impossible for me to show that I value someone more than others (in a positive sense, I have no problem showing I dislike an individual).
Since then I've been taking various supplements - phenibut at first, but these pills proved to be incredibly addictive with awful withdrawal, so after a break I switched to l-theanine, htp-5, l-tyrosine, and magnesium+B6.
Long story short, how do I make a move, how do I show someone how I feel about them? You can't imagined how many times girls were in my room perhaps waiting for something to happen but leaving at least slightly disappointed...
And this thought is driving me crazy, my anxiety manifests itself more and more with all the symptoms I nearly forgot about years ago. What do I do??
Recently, another girl has openly told me she likes me a lot and that we should go out together, guess if anything happened? I'm even afraid to admit to myself that I might be actually interested in it.
Thanks for listening (:, I just wanted to share my feelings and perhaps get some advice.
P.S. I have no money for a therapist unfortunately...