Bananas!
01-05-2016, 11:42 AM
Hi all,
I'm not sure if this is the right place for this, please feel free to move if it's not!
So this is an issue that creeps up on me every now and again, unlike a lot of my anxious thoughts/obsessions, I do feel it might be something I really should be worried about but I'm not sure if it's my anxiety making me feel this way.
I have been with my partner for 6 years now and he is the love of my life. Unfortunately, I was pretty messed up during the first year of our relationship and (stupidly) kissed somebody else about 6 months into it. I felt so horrible the day after and immediately told my OH and he forgave me, as I was so drunk, etc (not an excuse I know).
We put it behind us and I did forget about it for years until one day my friend bumped into the guy I kissed and he asked about me. This set me off on a kinda anxiety/panic attack which made me ruminate about the incident on and off for the last year or two. I brought it up with a counsellor at the time and she said that I had told my OH and I should just let it go (which I did for awhile at least.)
But I keep thinking about every little detail of the incident- how me and this guy were talking inappropriately before hand and such which I never really went into detail with my OH about. Don't get me wrong, I've brought up the subject since but he just got angry and said he doesn't want to know about it.
Am I being more selfish/worse for not telling him all the details or am I respecting his wishes to only know the minimum of what happened?
I would love any opinions/advice on this!
I'm not sure if this is the right place for this, please feel free to move if it's not!
So this is an issue that creeps up on me every now and again, unlike a lot of my anxious thoughts/obsessions, I do feel it might be something I really should be worried about but I'm not sure if it's my anxiety making me feel this way.
I have been with my partner for 6 years now and he is the love of my life. Unfortunately, I was pretty messed up during the first year of our relationship and (stupidly) kissed somebody else about 6 months into it. I felt so horrible the day after and immediately told my OH and he forgave me, as I was so drunk, etc (not an excuse I know).
We put it behind us and I did forget about it for years until one day my friend bumped into the guy I kissed and he asked about me. This set me off on a kinda anxiety/panic attack which made me ruminate about the incident on and off for the last year or two. I brought it up with a counsellor at the time and she said that I had told my OH and I should just let it go (which I did for awhile at least.)
But I keep thinking about every little detail of the incident- how me and this guy were talking inappropriately before hand and such which I never really went into detail with my OH about. Don't get me wrong, I've brought up the subject since but he just got angry and said he doesn't want to know about it.
Am I being more selfish/worse for not telling him all the details or am I respecting his wishes to only know the minimum of what happened?
I would love any opinions/advice on this!