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Michael333
12-11-2015, 11:30 AM
Hi everyone,

I decided to come back on this forum after about approximately a year and a half or so of not having posted at all. I forgot my former username and password, so I made a new account to tell my story and hope that it encourages some of you to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I had suffered with GAD and my main problem was obsessive thinking. I was a complete mess, I remember in my first two months I was on Ativan(lorazepam), and even Seroquel XR at one point for about a week (I was prescribed this on vacation because of bad panic attacks, the doctor didn't want to risk anything since he knew I'd be away from home from a while longer). After about a month of these medications, and terrible anxiety, my family doctor prescribed me SSRI's (I forget the brand). I refused to take them, and I refused to believe that I couldn't cure myself.

The big problem with trying to get to the light at the end of your tunnel is that your mind is trapped in this box, and it's almost like you cant get out of it. The worst part is, your mind is the only thing that can get you out of this box and its that same mind that's giving you these issues to begin with. That's why when you try to ignore your anxieties or face them, it's so hard.. Your mind just doesnt seem to let you, but you need to do it anyways, even if you truly dont believe it's working - it does. You need to change negative thoughts into positive ones, you need to work hard every single day at getting better as a person. At this time last year I wanted to drop out of university, and just give up on everything, I couldn't cope. After months of sleepless nights and falling asleep just because my body didnt have enough energy to stay awake anymore because of this stress, I put my foot down. I got a gym membership, and shed 30 pounds (I wasn't overweight to begin with), and I competed for a radio station fitness competition and placed 2nd. I started dating my now girlfriend of 7 months, and I finished university and got my real estate license ontop of that.

What I realized is that there's just something about actually living life, that makes you feel too alive to worry about death, there's something small in everything you do that you see that makes life so amazing. And when you start to truly believe this, it becomes who you are. Then you just attract good people in your life, and when you beat the battle with anxiety and depression you realize that you can take on all of lifes challenges head on, you almost feel invincible and too strong to be harmed by your anxiety anymore.

Anxiety is a learning experience, you'll learn that nothing was worth worrying, but only after you've faced all your fears, or stopped perceiving them as threats. I know what it feels like to suffer these problems, and dont dare ever give up on yourselves because the way you feel in any given moment - whether that moment is a day, month year, or years, when you get out of it, just one moment of happy reality will make everything worth it. It's never too late to change your life, if you're not happy with how you look face your anxiety dont think and just get a gym membership and go. Go everyday, tell yourself that it will help you. You'll meet people, you'll look great and feel great, your confidence will go up. Every person on this earth is physically beautiful when they're at their best, find that best in you. It's never too late to change careers ever, just find your happiness.

I wish you all the best.

cloudy black
12-12-2015, 05:27 AM
big thanks Michael333 for taking the time to post something positive uplifting and helpful. i wish you well and long may this continue for you. you sound strong and focused.