Difficulty enjoying being normal??

[tidalpine]

Hello, I'm new here. Im Chelsea.
Ive suffered with anxiety for years. and most recently this year, panic attacks. And they are very common. Ive also been dealing with DP/DR. Which is hell.
I can feel myself sort of recovering from the DP/DR and severe anxiety along with existential thoughts that make me physically sick to my stomach. But I just can't seem to accept or be able to enjoy being normal , and not having any anxiety/panic/worry/stress that has been plaguing me for the past month. November was the hardest month I've ever had. And now that i can somewhat see the light at the end of the tunnel, i can't seem to accept my normalcy that I'm getting now. Its like when i do find myself not feeling any strong and intense sensations, I'm like "why? where did the anxiety go? this is really weird whats going on?!" and i end up getting really anxious and panicky from it. Its kinda dumb and silly but someone has to have felt this way before??

[cloudy black]

hello tidalpine yes it is weird when the anxiety "goes away" it like it is two different countries that you cant be in at the same time and neither makes any sense. anyway "normal" whats that! btw "normal" is good its just that you are more used to the anxiety. best not to over analyse and enjoy being "normal"

yes this is something that i dont understand either and especially when it is happening in shorter time frames. eg in the morning i can feel great a few hours later and i can feel like shite and there is no sensible reason why. when i get triggered then i can understand but other wise it donta maka sensa!

[tidalpine]

hello tidalpine yes it is weird when the anxiety "goes away" it like it is two different countries that you cant be in at the same time and neither makes any sense. anyway "normal" whats that! btw "normal" is good its just that you are more used to the anxiety. best not to over analyse and enjoy being "normal"

yes this is something that i dont understand either and especially when it is happening in shorter time frames. eg in the morning i can feel great a few hours later and i can feel like shite and there is no sensible reason why. when i get triggered then i can understand but other wise it donta maka sensa!

Yeah!! Definitely. Im worse in the mornings. and when i contemplate deeply.

[cloudy black]

ah.. best not to contemplate too deeply then! try doing something different in the morning. find a way of starting the day that doesn't plug you into anxiety

[Katie Hall]

I understand. Whenever I don't have anxiety I wonder where it went, but then as soon as I do I find the anxiety.

[tidalpine]

ah.. best not to contemplate too deeply then! try doing something different in the morning. find a way of starting the day that doesn't plug you into anxiety
Did you have any weird experiences when you're normal? like not feeling like yourself?

[cloudy black]

Did you have any weird experiences when you're normal? like not feeling like yourself?
unfortunately yes and it is a recurrent theme. and now the doc has given me some addictive happy pills! o christmas is nearly here

[Dahila]

What's being "Normal"?

[jessed03]

I would say this is normal. For a long time after my anxiety hit its peak, I was the same way. I guess there's a subconscious fear of regressing. Maybe during the course of your anxiety experience you developed unhealthy beliefs such as being "broken" or "damaged".

It takes time before you feel relaxed and confident again. Just try to live well, and I believe it'll all come together for you. Try to take care of your body, and try to live in a way that is meaningful for you.

This is just part of the healing process.

[cloudy black]

hi jessed03 you mean you reached the peak of your anxiety i dont know if i have. i sail close to it on many occasions. yes i try not to dwell on the damaged goods thinking. for me living well is a constant pushing through and yesterday i kinda went into a mini melt down. i have managed to get through a VERY busy week (o dont i sound important and grown up!) but at a usual cost of jitteryness. i dont think myself into this, i keep myself constantly busy to keep the grems away. its beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen so long since i have been relaxed i am beginning to think it doesn't exist. :(

[Jeffro]

What is DP/DR?

[Ponder]

What's being "Normal"?
A desire for acceptance - a standard that seeks to control ones manner and perceptions - a false belief that one can not thrive outside ones circle unless feeding into the cycle it's environment imprints. Normal is a term used to imply guilt for not fitting in - it's plays into the begging mentality of please and thank you when in a time long ago, people were too busy simply being themselves, instead of worrying over weather they fit into someone else's box or not.

A term used like sin. Made to make people feel guilty for not believing as others do. A self flagellating, loathing term for people to feel sorry for themselves ... yadda yadda.

A term that seeks to separate the chaff from the wheat.

The last thing anyone wants in a world like this, is to be considered normal. If your normal - your more fucked up than you could even know. Brainwashed and addicted. This world needs more abnormality. :)

But that's just my opinion. Most people find it easy to slap each other on the back and cruise on down the road with blinkers on.

Don't be so negative. Oh My. There goes another busted bubble.

Normality is more than just overrated, it's oversold. Be proud to be maladjusted. It takes a lot more insight and yields a real sense of peace that'll get you through the bumps that come and go.