Rough week but i survived and a little guilt

[gadguy]

Last week I lost a very dear friend to cancer, i had no idea she was doing that badly..no one did. We all thought she was going to beat this....she never let on to anyone how bad it really was. So her death came as a Huge shock...it took me back a bit, but made it through...the funeral was done her way..she planned it and it was a celebration of her life and comforting to those of us she left behind. This past weekend was my Company Holiday party. I usually go stag and have a great time, this year i had friend who has been a bit down so i invited her to get her out of house. I made it clear this was my place of employment and although we would be having a few drinks( getting a little buzz)..just don't over do it(plus we are old enough to know better) She over did...not more that a few dances in she was flat on her @$$ on dance floor....I was so embarrassed, I cut her off and bought her no more drinks, anyway by the end of night she was tore up..some of my friends not knowing any better were giving her drinks...fortunately she did not pass out until we got to room. I feel guilty for being so angry and her but I am...I just cant get my head around this...I understand people occasionally getting carried away...I've done it in the past......but not a formal function or after someone told me i had had to much...we are neither one close to being 20 something anymore and know better. I just feel like I tried to something nice and it backfired...no good deed goes unpunished. Feeling guilty over being angry but feel my anger is justified...mixed emotions and a mistake i will not make again. PS she was hungover for two days.

[cloudy black]

hello gadguy gosh what a shock for you regarding your dear friend. as for your female friend chalk that down to experience. from what i hear work do's always tend to get a lil bit wild. especially if the booze is free and at this time of year people are more likely to drink more than is good for them.

[Anne1221]

Do you think maybe she has an alcohol problem and is one of those people who can't stop once they start drinking, or was she just being inconsiderate to you?

[gadguy]

Do you think maybe she has an alcohol problem and is one of those people who can't stop once they start drinking, or was she just being inconsiderate to you?

Actually 6 of 1, half dozen of the other. My mistake I should have known better...I've seen this behavior before, but thought under these circumstances it would be different. I think this is partly why I am feeling a bit guilty, I showed her very little sympathy and have no desire to try and help her. I am at point now in my life were things are getting better anxiety wise and I don't need anyone else's drama, I am being selfish for a change.

[jessed03]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend, gadguy. That must have been a nasty shock.

Just my 0.2c, but I think you're doing the right thing regarding making yourself number one priority. It doesn't mean you can't give a little assistance when you feel able enough, it just means you put yourself first, right? I can sort of substitute my dad into your sentence in place of your friend, and it would ring true for me, too. People who can't/won't/refuse to take responsibility for themselves can drag you down, sadly. We all have a finite amount of energy to give.

Hope next week is a calmer one for you!

[gadguy]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend, gadguy. That must have been a nasty shock.

Just my 0.2c, but I think you're doing the right thing regarding making yourself number one priority. It doesn't mean you can't give a little assistance when you feel able enough, it just means you put yourself first, right? I can sort of substitute my dad into your sentence in place of your friend, and it would ring true for me, too. People who can't/won't/refuse to take responsibility for themselves can drag you down, sadly. We all have a finite amount of energy to give.

Hope next week is a calmer one for you!

THANX

If all goes as planned it will be a the next few weeks should be great....Christmas stress...none...told family we all have every thing we need so I'm not buying presents and don't buy me anything. I am giving what I would have spent to some one who is really in need...no shopping stress. Super simple Christmas....did not even bother with a tree or decorations this year...I will watch "A Christmas Carol" my favorite Christmas movie/story and relax and maybe a glass of wine by the fire.

[cloudy black]

If all goes as planned it will be a the next few weeks should be great....Christmas stress...none...told family we all have every thing we need so I'm not buying presents and don't buy me anything. I am giving what I would have spent to some one who is really in need...no shopping stress. Super simple Christmas....did not even bother with a tree or decorations this year...I will watch "A Christmas Carol" my favorite Christmas movie/story and relax and maybe a glass of wine by the fire.

eeeeeeeeeeh that sounds like my kinda christmas..cheers!

[Katie Hall]

It sounds like you are doing what is right for yourself. There are people who are just destructive to others. You want to help them but then they just drag you down. The best thing to do is take care of yourself in that situation-get out.