Nervous Ninny
11-02-2015, 11:05 AM
I have been living with my boyfriend since my kids left home. This summer we had a nasty break up. I have been dealing with more anxiety than ever. We have been kinda back together from time to time. I will be doing ok and getting used to being alone and he will call or text and then I my heart starts racing. I can't seem to keep myself from responding but I do not see a way this relationship can work out. He cheated with his Ex he tells me that all he did was one time however I have scoured his phone while he is asleep. He continued seeing her up until the time we started seeing each other again. He has lied a ridiculous amount, I check things on his phone and then ask him about them he just lies always trying to make himself look good.This is what happens I will try to break away and then it feels like I am in a vortex and I can't get out. I have been taking Relaquil for my anxiety but I need to get away from this man. I do not understand how come I keep going back to him. He is unhealthy for me yet when he calls or text I am a mess until I reply. I just want to have peace in my life again. I wish he would move back to the East coast where he came from. One thing that is stupid is that when I am with him I don't feel like this is a stable relationship and I will just lose him again. this brings on my anxiety. When I am not with him I feel like I will be alone forever and get crazy anxiety. This is stupid, I am a very attractive women with a lot of good qualities, my friends are all asking me " why do you have no self confidence" I answer I don't know. Any words of wisdom of how to stay away from a person you know if bad for you but I feel addicted to him for some crazy reason? I am experiencing more anxiety than ever.