Hello there! :)

[scaredskirt]

Hi everyone, and thanks for having me.

I've had severe anxiety and social phobia since I was a little girl, but my parents, teachers, etc., didn't have that knowledge back then, and so it was labelled "painfully shy." I used to even hide in my bedroom when family members came over to our house at Christmas or Thanksgiving time. I wish I could say it has gotten easier. In fact, it's much more difficult, and I am at a loss as to what to do about it. Benzodiazepines don't help me. Buspar doesn't help. I don't drink, so I don't know if that would help. I'm tempted to ask my doctor about medical marijuana, which is now legal in the state of Michigan.

The only two times during the week I leave the house are to go to group and individual therapy. It's pathetic, and I'd laugh about it if I wasn't so disgusted with myself. I mean, I'm 53 years old. Will I have to suffer this the rest of my life? :confused:

I'm a failure. A complete, stupid, idiotic loser.:(

I promise I will listen to and consider any advice you have to offer.

Thank you SO much.

---scaredskirt

[I Hikikomori]

Dearest Scaredskirt,

You are not at all any of those bad things you say about yourself. I am an exact replica of you. Everything you said in your form is what I've been through as well. For me, I don't see anything wrong with being like this. I am at complete peace in my home. If and when I have to go outside to an appointment or run an errand, I just take my anxiety PRN and do what I have to do. Before I know it I'm back home again, although it's never fast enough.

When you think about it, there are people out there who are the complete opposite of us. Those people can't get enough of the social life. They're not happy unless they're chatting it up with a bunch of people are going places and being socially active. They can't sit still for a minute, or really appreciate the beautiful peace and quiet of being home all day by themselves. Are they idiotic losers? No, they're just different just like us. Nothing wrong with us being who we are.

From the very day I was born I was a quiet introvert who hated social interaction. I had nothing but anxiety when my parents had all these plans for me. I couldn't handle all the social situations my parents dragged me through, like all the birthday parties (even my own birthday party!), family holidays, extracurricular activities, etc. I hated every single one of those days I was forced to attend those -- again, I even hated having my own birthday parties! I didn't know what to say I didn't care what they had to say, I just needed quiet alone time. If I didn't have a place to escape to like a bedroom or some secret place I could hide, I would have absolute anxiety. Honestly, for me, I don't know that there's anything to "do" about this because that's just who I am. I was born this way. I am a leopard born with beautiful spots, how can anyone change that?



Hi everyone, and thanks for having me.

I've had severe anxiety and social phobia since I was a little girl, but my parents, teachers, etc., didn't have that knowledge back then, and so it was labelled "painfully shy." I used to even hide in my bedroom when family members came over to our house at Christmas or Thanksgiving time. I wish I could say it has gotten easier. In fact, it's much more difficult, and I am at a loss as to what to do about it. Benzodiazepines don't help me. Buspar doesn't help. I don't drink, so I don't know if that would help. I'm tempted to ask my doctor about medical marijuana, which is now legal in the state of Michigan.

The only two times during the week I leave the house are to go to group and individual therapy. It's pathetic, and I'd laugh about it if I wasn't so disgusted with myself. I mean, I'm 53 years old. Will I have to suffer this the rest of my life? :confused:

I'm a failure. A complete, stupid, idiotic loser.:(

I promise I will listen to and consider any advice you have to offer.

Thank you SO much.

---scaredskirt

[unknownme]

Hey Scaredskirt, please don't say those things about yourself nor think them. you are so much more than what your mind says to you. You've spent years telling yourself all those negative stuff, that's poison that grows in your mind and take over you. You start to believe them so badly you can't see otherwise. I'm half your age so you're much older but I know what it's done to me and I don't wanna see it happen to anyone else.

Have you tried sports or exercise? (I say this all the time 'cause I get worse then I don't have it) New hobbies? (for example, penpalling and postcard swapping helped me and you get to interact with people, which might be a good start and easier. bit by bit) Focus on your plans for life and on the stuff you want to do. You're going to therapy and that's so good, I'm so proud. Many people (me included) don't even have the guts to admit they have anxiety or go to a therapist. It's not pathetic, it's you trying to take care of yourself, that's really good and you should be proud.

[I Hikikomori]

I agree with you, unknownme. You're right about the negative feelings taking over.

Scaredskirt, some form of exercise really helps fight back when horrible feelings try to take over our thoughts. I had group therapy last night and they just talked about that. I have a little exercise cycle in my room that I use when I feel overwhelmed with anxiety or depression. Even if it's on the lowest setting, I'll cycle and watch a funny show on my iPad. If I use that as my getaway each time I feel bad about myself, it helps me get through the storm for a while. Plus, I just raised my endorphins and improved my health at the same time. It's hard to get motivated at first, but it gets better each time. :) Do you have a way to get some exercise there at home?

[Davit]

I'm an introvert sitting here perfectly happy to be alone. (cats don't count) I can do his day in day out because I accepted for me it is normal and I'm perfectly happy this way. I get a few visitors I entertain because they help me with things I can't do. I like me and don't want to be anyone else. Life could be worse, I could need people and be shunned or used.

[I Hikikomori]

Amen! :content: