Hey everyone...

[Mylassie]

I stumbled on this forum a while back (about a year ago) when my head was all over the place. It really only got bad to the point where I couldn't do anything last July. I caught my partner of 6 years smoking for the first ever time and I had a major anxiety attack. We were staying at his parents for a few days, and when he came up to talk to me about it, she followed.

Said I was over reacting and should just grow up. Even now I can't place how I reacted back then. I was freaking out, shaking all over, my mouth was dry and I just wanted to run. But it was 2:30AM, so even if I had wanted to it wouldn't have been advisable. I think it was more the shock that he was smoking than anything else but I don't know.

Anyway, that night we almost broke up. He put an ultimatum on the relationship, saying if I couldn't accept it we were over. The amount of stuff going through my head after was ridiculous. I told him he needed to give me time, that it wasn't just something I could accept over night and be happy with.

We went back home, and after a few days I saw a doctor. My appetite had completely gone out of the window, I was going days without eating anything at all. My left arm was weak and the right was shaking on and off. I tried to fill my time doing things but I lost interest, so I spent days just mulling over how I reacted, how his mum spoke to me, and trying to get my head around it and I couldn't.
The doctor said it was anxiety, so I looked into all the symptoms and things the following weeks.

I didn't tell my partner though, I wanted to try and get my head sorted before I told him. (Turned out when I did he just thought it was a little convenient, and that I was still making a load of excuses up.) He was supportive with me, but I don't think he really understood how I felt and how confused I was. And even now I still can't work it out myself.

Anyway, after a while I was becoming myself again. And for the past few weeks I've kept myself busy, but me and him got bombarded with calls from his family to come down again, and I found myself being backed into a corner. I felt like I had to say 'Yeah, we'll go.' with two days notice, and the nausea, and slight headaches reared their head again.

I've also noticed that occasionally my arm will shake slightly too, and my arm goes weak again. I'm trying to put the 'I'm okay' face on, but the history and major dark period of last year is rearing it's head so often I really don't know what to do.

Sorry about the long post, I'm not sure exactly what else to say so I'm going to post it and see what happens.

Thanks for reading..

[Fl0wergirl121]

Hello :)
for starters your situation doesn't seem the best and I'm really sorry that things turned out the way they did.
As for the whole situation with your partners parents, I personally would just explain your situation to him fully.
I think that if he really cares about you then he should understand.
even if it seems pointless I think just having someone to support you can often lighten the load.
I think that communication in relationships is very important and not just in romantic ones.
It's important to try and tell others how you're feeling and what you're going through because no matter how scary it seems its always been worth it for me.
anyway, sorry if I didn't fully understand but I hope that I managed to help you in some way.
Good luck xx :)

[Shamrocker]

Hi everyone, I've recently been diagnosed with general anxiety. It's been tough because I recently got married. My wife is understanding but the medication I'm on has made me lose some interest in the bedroom. 20mg depramil. The last few days I've been having weird flashbacks of my life and it made my anxiety shoot through the roof. I try my best to act normal but I feel total ****. Almost lost my job because everytime I think I'm having a heart attack!!!!!!!! Wake up in the middle of the night sweating and hot flashes!!!!!!!! Does it ever get better?

[unknownme]

You shouldn't have to accept anything harmful (even if it is "just" smoking) that your partner does nor do you deserve threaths like that when you've done nothing wrong. Speaking from experience, you can't keep living your life saying yes to everyone and putting your okay face and pretend nothing's wrong. It will eat you alive. I was in a relationship for almost 4 years, almost 2 of which we were living together with his mom and stepdad and I did my best to keep up with his demands and changes and I'm still cleaning up the mess mentally and emotionally. It's just devastating. So, please don't do that to yourself. If he can't understand you have anxiety, you gotta leave. He has to respect you.

Take care of yourself first and others come later.

[unknownme]

Hi everyone, I've recently been diagnosed with general anxiety. It's been tough because I recently got married. My wife is understanding but the medication I'm on has made me lose some interest in the bedroom. 20mg depramil. The last few days I've been having weird flashbacks of my life and it made my anxiety shoot through the roof. I try my best to act normal but I feel total ****. Almost lost my job because everytime I think I'm having a heart attack!!!!!!!! Wake up in the middle of the night sweating and hot flashes!!!!!!!! Does it ever get better?

Shamrocker, your comment is kinda confusing and you should've done this on a post of yourself. But you have to go to your doctor/therapist and explain the situation. He's the best to advice you and to medicate you.