Intrusive thoughts

[jwellz38]

I've had panic disorder for nearly 10 years now. I've learned to manage it well to where I've been back to normal again for many years without taking medications. Id say for the past 7 years I've been virtually panic free. However, recently within the past few months I've been getting a different type of symptom; intrusive thoughts. Not sure how they initially began, or what triggered em. In particular, I seem to obsess about knives now; scared I might pick up a knife and stab someone with it. Or go and get one from the kitchen and stab someone with it. I get so anxious I may act on it, it turns into a full out panic attack. All it seems to take is a flash of an image of a knife in my mind, or when I get around knives or other sharp objects I get anxious. Afraid I might actually do it, or like I'm holding back the urge to do it or something. I think this is even more scary than the bodily sensation anxiety of panic disorder because it involves other people, or could potentially put other people in danger. Thats what scares me. I've spent the past month now stressed and anxious of those images coming back into my mind. Caught in kind of a cycle. I was just wondering if anyone else has dealt with this, and if so what has helped them get past it. Or stop the thoughts. Will medication help with this? I've gone 10 years without needing medication, but I've been thinking I may need something lately.

[needtogetwell]

Jwells,

Maybe your first stop should be a visit to your doctor and maybe a therapist. This may just be a random thing but since it is causing such distress some professional help may be an order.

Good luck.

[NixonRulz]

I've been having trouble with intrusive thoughts lately that I can't seem to shake. I've had panic disorder for nearly 10 years now, and learned to manage it well to where I was back to normal again for many years without taking medications. Until recently, within the few months I've been getting these intrusive thoughts. Not sure how they started. In particular, ones about knives, or picking up a knife and killing someone with it. Like someone I care about who's unsuspecting. It's so scary to me. I've spent wholes days and nights for the past few weeks to a month now stressed and anxious of those images coming back into my mind. All it seems to take is a flash of an image of a knife, or when I get around knives I get anxious, scared I might just grab one. I've not dealt with anything quite like this before. I was just wondering if anyone else has dealt with this, and if so what has helped them get past it. Or stop the thoughts. Will medication help with this? Should I take medication? I've gone 10 years without needing medication, but I've been thinking I may need it lately.

Intrusive thoughts are absolutely the most scary symptom of anxiety. The thought of harming yourself or others feels so real and it makes you feel like that this is much more than just anxiety

But it's not

Intrusive thoughts are so normal when really stressed. They just seem so real you believe you need to do something to prevent them from occurring

I had thoughts that were so crazy and I couldn't believe what was going through my mind.

Don't be too concerned whether you really feel the way you think. You are freaking out over those thoughts so you have no intention of doing anything about them

Just as a schizophrenic wouldn't believe those thoughts were bad, you know they are so you aren't crazy.

You're just another in a huge line of people that have had these thoughts and were scared as hell of them

When your anxiety lessens or leaves, those thought leave with it. Thats a promise

Hang in there

[jessed03]

Anxiety is all about "what ifs". When your heart is racing, you think to yourself "what if I'm having a heart attack?!"

You're just suffering from a different kind of what if. You're looking at a knife, or whatever, and thinking "what if I pick it up and...."

Same process, different object being focused on.

Intrusive thoughts are extremely frightening, especially when you are new to this. I was 100% sure I was schizophrenic when I had my first serious intrusive thought. I mean, I had to be, right? Normal people don't think about harming their loved ones. Turns out I was wrong, and actually, as Nixon said, intrusive thoughts and even desires are just a symptom of stress.

You aren't suffering from any serious mental illness. You won't ever act on your thoughts, no matter what they tell you or how they make you feel. You will get better, that is to say, you'll get over this particular symptom.

Label them as intrusive thoughts and try to focus on something else while they're happening. The less attention you give them, the quicker they die. Everybody makes the mistake of getting involved with them though. Accept they're a symptom of stress, just like a heart palpitation. This is the essence of curing them, but isn't always that simple. If you can do this, you'll find they go. They'll fight you first, but then they'll go. If you feel you can't, or if you need a little extra help, talk to your doctor or therapist. They deal with this regularly.

Take care.

[gypsylee]

I remember coming off Valium a few years ago. There was a big knife on the kitchen bench and I looked at it and thought "what if I lose control, grab that thing and stab myself with it?" I can still picture it. I was pretty messed up because I went cold turkey off the Valium and hadn't slept in a while, but hey I never lost control over anything, let alone stabbing myself with the knife. Anxious minds just love to torment us!

[Dahila]

I remember planing the stubbing of my ex husband, I am not kidding. Somehow I divorced him....... I am not making fun or joking, I had the thoughts for years.........

[Kixxi]

I've had panic disorder for nearly 10 years now. I've learned to manage it well to where I've been back to normal again for many years without taking medications. Id say for the past 7 years I've been virtually panic free. However, recently within the past few months I've been getting a different type of symptom; intrusive thoughts. Not sure how they initially began, or what triggered em. In particular, I seem to obsess about knives now; scared I might pick up a knife and stab someone with it. Or go and get one from the kitchen and stab someone with it. I get so anxious I may act on it, it turns into a full out panic attack. All it seems to take is a flash of an image of a knife in my mind, or when I get around knives or other sharp objects I get anxious. Afraid I might actually do it, or like I'm holding back the urge to do it or something. I think this is even more scary than the bodily sensation anxiety of panic disorder because it involves ther people, or could potentially put other people in danger. Thats what scares me. I've spent the past month now stressed and anxious of those images coming back into my mind. Caught in kind of a cycle. I was just wondering if anyone else has dealt with this, and if so what has helped them get past it. Or stop the thoughts. Will medication help with this? I've gone 10 years without needing medication, but I've been thinking I may need something lately.

Unfortunately, thoughts of going crazy or doing something out of control is pretty standard stuff for someone with a panic disorder. I get them quite frequently. The thought that you are scared of doing something like that is a good sign though.
However, it is a sign that you are stressing out about something and intrusive thoughts take over. Therapy might just do the trick.