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View Full Version : Has anyone successfully beat/greatly improved their anxiety? Intro & story.



anonymoususer
04-30-2015, 12:50 PM
Well I've seen a few therapists/psychologists/etc. They never seem to be able to help me more than I can help myself. For this reason I thought I'd tell my story and potentially crowd source some help.

I have what I feel is just about the perfect life. I have an amazing wife, we're both self employed, we've traveled to over 20 countries, I have close personal connections to some of the most wealthy/powerful people in the world, this gives me the unique ability to ask for financial/business advice that is priceless before I make a decision.

To those outside looking in everything appears to be great. On the mental side things aren't always so perfect. I've excelled at business because I have a very powerful mind, I can't turn it off, and I can't slow it down. Doing so by other means such as drugs and/or alcohol worked as a kid but can be very uncomfortable for me now so those are out too. When I've applied my mind to positive things I am extremely productive and learn things very quickly(though I forget most of it equally as fast when I'm not using it). However, this is a double edged sword as my mind is equally as capable of internalizing and ripping itself and my body apart. I can go from 0 to feeling high as a kite and level 100 nausea is a split second with one bad thought.

Recently I've had major surgery to correct an issue that shouldn't be present until 60s. I was 29 at the time, 30 now. Due to this, I feel like a ticking time bomb. The chance of lifetime reoccurrence is somewhere around 22%. The chance of reoccurrence within the first year is less than 1%. Some days I still feel a little pain though and it throws me into full panic. I don't even know why. I'll admit I'm a bit afraid to die now as the thought of losing my wife shakes me to my core. This is something I'd never felt before(I can honestly say I barely felt fear before I met her). Unfortunately the panic sets in far before any rational thought or fear of bodily harm or death. Once it starts it can take me days to recover. during this period I feel helpless. I can't think clearly(rules out working) and NOTHING can seem to calm me down. I'm in such a panic the whole world feels too slow for me. TV, movies, video games, work, sex(in really bad cases), social interaction, it all begins to feel like torture or repulsive.

I just wanted to know if there is anyone else out there in a similar position that has had notable success. I'm starting to feel trapped. My wife is phenomenal and is always there for me as I am for her. We're working together on this but both feel very lost. I'm not sure if it's age, stress or life events but I am really struggling with this one. Any advice/help would be greatly appreciated.

raggamuffin
04-30-2015, 12:58 PM
"They never seem to be able to help me more than I can help myself"

Why is that? I know it can take time to find the right therapist. But what were you hesitating on in terms of helping yourself? What you get out of therapy hinges on what you put in.

Ed

gypsylee
05-01-2015, 07:26 AM
"I've excelled at business because I have a very powerful mind, I can't turn it off, and I can't slow it down."

So it's powerful but undisciplined :)

Do some reading on mindfulness - New Age books such as "The Power of Now" and/or Buddhist philosophy.

Cheers,
Gypsy x

anonymoususer
05-01-2015, 09:09 AM
"They never seem to be able to help me more than I can help myself"

Why is that? I know it can take time to find the right therapist. But what were you hesitating on in terms of helping yourself? What you get out of therapy hinges on what you put in.

Ed

I'm not quite sure. I definitely give them the benefit of the doubt. I actually enjoy talking to them. It can feel good to get stuff off your chest in an unfiltered manner. I think it just always seems that they're trying to push pills down my throat. Medication almost always makes me very uncomfortable. Solutions like Ativan work(temporarily) but I hate them and become physically dependent very quickly (as little as two weeks of regular work).

anonymoususer
05-01-2015, 09:36 AM
"I've excelled at business because I have a very powerful mind, I can't turn it off, and I can't slow it down."

So it's powerful but undisciplined :)

Do some reading on mindfulness - New Age books such as "The Power of Now" and/or Buddhist philosophy.

Cheers,
Gypsy x

Haha, yeah. I'm very all over the spectrum, both disciplined and undisciplined; mostly undisciplined. I've been self employed since 15 so obviously I can pull it together at times. It is a crazy time because I'll soon be selling off my business as I've now got ownership in something considerably larger and less stressful. That is a large part of the problem though. I feel less stress than I have in years. yet one TINY pain in the general area of the surgery and its been three days of pure agony. It's hard to feel safe when something so small can upset my life so much.

I actually have read some books on buddhist philosophy(as a teenager), I think I've just lost touch with having any sort of control over how I think. I used to have a ridiculous amount of control over my brain. I used to do cool experiments like changing the taste of food by willing it and such. I'm not sure when I lost control but I definitely feel like i'm in a rodeo at this point. Just along for the ride. I'm trying to regain control but days like today remind me of how little progress i've really made.

I knew "The Power of Now" sounded familiar. I'm fairly certain my dad read every Eckhart Tolle book in existence before he passed away. They really helped comfort him. I'll have to go grab it from my mom and check it out. My dad and I are/were a lot alike.

gypsylee
05-01-2015, 09:28 PM
Yeah the Eckhart Tolle books are good. I think I actually liked the second one, A New Earth, best. I always need to revisit this stuff because you get caught up in the stress of life and forget everything.

Im-Suffering
05-02-2015, 06:20 AM
.... remind me of how little progress i've really made.


. I'm fairly certain my dad read every Eckhart Tolle book in existence before he passed away. .



Then don't wait until the end to find yourself.

This is dad's message. And your advice.

There is no trophy for being the richest man in the cemetary. There is fanfare however for the man who conquered self, and won. Your rich friends cannot help you. As a matter of fact you may lose some of them. As you lose your self. And find it on the other side of (as you will find) the (same) coin.

Dad will be proud, you understand. This message comes from a much broader perspective you see. Free from many of the limiting beliefs you hold.

Don't wear this 'powerful mind' as a badge on your coat. True power is universal power. Drawing from love, and joy - from love you grow, heal, and find peace. From self-aggrandizement you rot inside out, both mentally and physical health, you understand.

Now we did not say one must 'give up' physical wealth, achievement, or passion and become a monk ! But bring self to a balance, see? When he finds himself too far from his truth. (Middle line).

The 20's and 30's are a great time of physical energy, 'natural' aggression, however many look back and wish they could somehow have tempered self with humility, compassion, and love - do this consciously, and there will be no need for 'illness' or 'operations' - which are symbolic, you see.

That is as far as we will go for now.