New and looking for strategies

[Iamok]

Hi everyone. This is the first time I've used a message board like this, but from what I've browsed through, you all seem like very kind people. I'm looking for a community that understands what I'm dealing with; anxiety is a very lonely experience.

I've always been tense and on edge; a habitual worrier, but it's gotten worse over the last few years. I find myself avoiding certain situations more any more, and am constantly imagining the worst case scenarios, and making myself physically sick with worry. I don't have any specific phobias, aside from social situations I guess. I am in constant fear of being judged or of others not liking me. I know that my negative thinking is the main cause of my anxiety, but changing that is easier said than done.

Awhile ago I worked up the courage to book a solo trip when my anxiety wasn't so bad, and it's coming up in a couple of weeks. My anxiety is getting worse and worse as my departure draws near; I worry that I'm going to mentally break and I won't be able to go. Looking for some strategies and coping skills to help get me through this trip (and actually enjoy it!!).

[Kuma]

Hi everyone. This is the first time I've used a message board like this, but from what I've browsed through, you all seem like very kind people. I'm looking for a community that understands what I'm dealing with; anxiety is a very lonely experience.

I've always been tense and on edge; a habitual worrier, but it's gotten worse over the last few years. I find myself avoiding certain situations more any more, and am constantly imagining the worst case scenarios, and making myself physically sick with worry. I don't have any specific phobias, aside from social situations I guess. I am in constant fear of being judged or of others not liking me. I know that my negative thinking is the main cause of my anxiety, but changing that is easier said than done.

Awhile ago I worked up the courage to book a solo trip when my anxiety wasn't so bad, and it's coming up in a couple of weeks. My anxiety is getting worse and worse as my departure draws near; I worry that I'm going to mentally break and I won't be able to go. Looking for some strategies and coping skills to help get me through this trip (and actually enjoy it!!).

Hello and welcome. I hope you decide to stay here a while. Have a look around the General forum, which is usually the most active. You are very right that anxiety is a lonely experience. In part that is because of the stigma that remains. For example, tell your friends "I have been out of work the last two days because I had the flu" and the response is "I hope you feel better" -- but say "I have been out of work the past few days because of acute anxiety and a panic attack" and you may never be viewed quite the same again. That is one reason these forums can be useful, even for those who don't usually spend time on internet forums. We understand what you are experiencing because WE have experienced. And of course the anonymity helps too.

Have you done anything to try to address your anxiety? Any medication or therapy or anything else? Some of us can manage it without any of that. But I say "if you need help, get it". Why suffer if there might be an answer.

Regarding the trip alone, I have done a lot of that, over the years. I think it will be good for you. Push yourself to do it, and to enjoy it, even if your anxiety places some road blocks. Force yourself to start conversations with people. Bring some books for the alone time. Where are you going? Solo travel can be a great confidence builder. You may come back from this trip with renewed strength and confidence.

[Iamok]

Thanks for your support :)

I've been relying on self-help to address my anxiety. Medication isn't something I'm comfortable with, and therapy is out of my financial realm right now. Mostly I've been trying to change my thought process and convince myself that this is something I can control. I've had some success in the past, but lately it's gotten bad again so I'm having to reteach myself all the techniques. I wish anxiety was something you could cure once and for all, it's frustrating to have set backs!

I'm really happy to hear about your success with solo trips, that's definitely encouraging! I'm going to Iceland, so no fears about being unsafe or anything like that. Just general fears about being surrounded by people I don't know, out of my comfort zone, away from home.

[Dahila]

Welcome to the forum. I am dealing with your situation for over 40 years. I am on meds, but not antidepressants. I can not take them. I am meditating and I swear that saved my life a thousand times over. What about trying some visualization or guided meditation; you just listen and do what the person says. You may try some herbs, there is tons of herbs helping to take edge of anxiety :)

[Kuma]

Icelandic people tend to be quite friendly and accepting of visitors. You will like it there. And I bet you come home with a renewed sense of confidence and optimism.

[Iamok]

I have never tried meditation, thanks for the recommendation Dahila! I feel like there's a constant stream of negative thoughts going through my head; do you find that meditation actually quiets your thoughts completely? Or does it more just give you a sense of calm? And with guided meditation, is that something you would go and do with a group? Or would you just download an audio track at home?

[Dahila]

I have never tried meditation, thanks for the recommendation Dahila! I feel like there's a constant stream of negative thoughts going through my head; do you find that meditation actually quiets your thoughts completely? Or does it more just give you a sense of calm? And with guided meditation, is that something you would go and do with a group? Or would you just download an audio track at home?
Absolutely, I have the same problem as you do, the only difference is I am living with it 40 years, yes meditation is the tool to stop my obsessive thinking and worrying.
Iceland is so beautiful you will enjoy every minute of it. I have a friend there:) The pure beauty of environment is very calming.
The mountains there..........oh there is a meditation that you imagine you are a mountain and you do not move and everything moves around you. It is very calming and you see like a movie :)
You have the ability to become the mountain, the tree, the leave, the star, use it, It helps a lot. Then maybe try something as easy and tasty as Lemon balm tea before the bed, or lemon balm extract :) I actually make my own extracts from the herbs I grow, they help through the day I do not take meds just on Evening and before sleep............:)

[Iamok]

That sounds very calming, thanks for the recommendation Dahila!

[jessed03]

I went on holiday to Eastern Europe a week after getting out of a mental hospital. I had a few humps (mostly my fault), but there was no kind of collapse. I think the experience, like Kuma said, gave me a lot of confidence, and changed my perspective on life. I have every faith you'll be fine on yours, and will even enjoy it.

You Canadians really do like the cold, don't you! From Alberta to Iceland. :)

[Iamok]

I went on holiday to Eastern Europe a week after getting out of a mental hospital. I had a few humps (mostly my fault), but there was no kind of collapse. I think the experience, like Kuma said, gave me a lot of confidence, and changed my perspective on life. I have every faith you'll be fine on yours, and will even enjoy it.

You Canadians really do like the cold, don't you! From Alberta to Iceland. :)

Haha it's not THAT cold in Iceland. From what I hear, it's name is quite misleading. Alberta on the other hand...

But I'm really glad to hear you had such a great experience with your trip, it gives me hope.

[Dahila]

We Canadians are not scared easily. This passed winter kept the temp -26 at night up to -33. Tough but we have an excellent way of keeping houses warm. The best system I had ever seen

[ningersnap]

Hey, I too am not comfortable with medication and therapy is out of my financial situation right now (broke college student). I definitely hear you on that! But there are lots of techniques, breathing techniques especially, that I like to do. It's also good to have someone who knows about your disorder and will listen objectively when you talk about it. It's almost nicer than having a therapist (not that I've had one) or someone that has anxiety. Someone who just listens makes you feel a lot better.