Hello Im New

[Katrina3]

Hello

I have just found this site, i was looking for a forum where i could chat to people about my anxiety proplem, im 17 years old and have my whole life a head of me how ever i cant see a future for my self, i have Agoraphobia and reliy heavliy on my twin sister, the good thing about this is my Aunt has Agoraphobia aswell, so she can help me to a certain extent, i say that because she did try to get me to walk further dwon the street how ever i can only get to the lamp post, i feel like im stuck and cant do any thing, in my mind i want to go to the shops and get some thing by myself but i cant because thats when i panic, i really want to do my A levels next year, but yet again i have this stopping me, i have cried many times over my life, and find that there is no point living like this as im not happy, i dont want to commit sucide how ever its an option thats starting to wander through my mind,

I would be so grate full if any one could give me some advice, i will be going counsling in Jan but dont see how that can make me walk down the street and go places by myself!

Thank you,
Katrina x[/b]

[shoe]

Katrina,

welcome to the forum. I know things can seem hopeless at times, but dont ever give up! There's many things in life that you'll find to enjoy and be happy about.. so you do have things to live for. You'll get past your agoraphobia and be going further and further. It just takes small steps.

Its good you will be seeing a counselor, as they can help you explore other issues that may be bothering you and preventing you from doing things. They will most likely ask you to do CBT exercises, which it sounds like you have been making attempts at. I think if you can make it to the lamp post and feel okay, then you need to go just a little further and see how long you can 'tough' it out before it gets too difficult to deal with.. and then come back the next day and try to tough it out a little longer.. and so on, until you can move further and further away on your own. But try to do this with therapy, or at least purchase a book that will help you learn ways to cope. There are breathing exercises and other calming methods you can use to help you overcome this.

good luck, and welcome to the forum
shoe

[brickyard_red]

Welcome Katrina. I'm so glad you're here! I'm happy to hear you say that you wouldn't commit suicide. It's not a good thing to think about it, but if you can tell yourself that you have yourself and your family to live for that is a good thing.

Like Shoe said, you have so much to live for in the future. Right now it looks like nothing will ever get better, that it will always be this way. But believe us when we say, it does get better.

Your counselor will be able to help you greatly I think. They know ways of dealing that we don't. Hang in there and post anytime you feel like it and never be afraid to say what you're feeling. I can tell you that you are not alone in your feelings.

Cath :)

[Katrina3]

Hello

Thank You for replying, i suppose it the counsilling will, but i guess i cant see the light at the end of the tunnel, I want to do so many things like i said and its really frustrating!

In the new year, i will be doing walks again :(, well if it helps then i will just have to bite the bullet, I am grate full for supposrt that i recieve from my aunt but its like i said theres onlt so much a person can do, i will keep posting and again thank you it will be good to talk about my feelings,

Katrina

[Maggie May]

Hey Katrina,

Welcome, I'm new to this forum too. :)

I just wanted to mention some things that might make your attempts to get past the lamppost easier.

It sounds like you're really committed to beating this thing, good for you. That's one of the keys to success, determination. But we all know you need more than that, or else we'd all be cured.

The "something else" that may help you is called systematic desensitization, which is a fancy way of saying doing things a tiny tiny bit at a time.

For your goal of getting past the lampost, here's how it would work.

Keep taking walks every day (or more often, if you can handle it) to the lamppost. Don't try to go past it yet, just keep making it to the lamppost. Take deep breaths and let them out slowly as you're walking. When you get to the lamppost, stay there as long as you can, or if you have to back right away, that's okay. Just keep walking to the lamppost until you can walk to it without feeling intense anxiety. If it takes you five days of trips, that's fine. If it takes you ten days of trips, that's fine too. If it takes you a month of trips, so be it.

I promise you that eventually you will be able to walk to the lamppost and not feel intense anxiety. When this happens, reward yourself. Right away, with something good, something you really like. It doesn't have to be expensive, it can be a popsicle or a bubble bath. Then start walking to the lamppost and two steps further. And then turn around and walk home. And keep doing that until you can do it without intense anxiety. The idea is to push the limits of what you can handle open, but you do it so slowly, and so gently, that you never have to freak out.

Remember, lasting change takes time. Like the Colorado River carving out the Grand Canyon. It took hundreds of years, but look how deep it is. And it happened a teeny tiny bit at a time. You have hundreds and hundreds of days. You can do it.

Keep us posted!

Maggie

[brickyard_red]

That's great Maggie May. *clapping

You have a way with words. They just seem to flow. :) Thank you.

Cath :)

[shoe]

MaggieMay, thanks for helping to explain systematic desensitization.. thats really great advice and definitely something that could be helpful to many here

[Katrina3]

Hello :)

that sounds good to me, i will be doing that in the new year, and you are right dosnt matter how long it takes me to get further at least i have achieved the step!

I did very well today, i went shopping and it was packed, i usually avoid the crowed places and today i forgot that it wuold be busy bieng christmas and all, i had the chance to go back to the car but decied to ride it out, i panicked but got through it.

Thank you for the advice it is really help full to me, how long can it last? I mean i have been thinking maybe i should go on some tablets in Jan, i would rather not like to because i dont want to relie on them, so i dont know what i should do, what do you think? :?

Katrina