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View Full Version : This Whole "Forget Your Past and Move On" Thing..



Kawaii
03-22-2015, 07:28 PM
Our past shapes who we are, it defines our actions through trial and error and helps us to learn and become better at dealing with issues. Our past experiences provide us with memories, the happiness and simplicity of our youth which can of course often trigger nostalgia. Not all of our past memories are happy however, heart ache, sadness, anger, fear and resentment can be extremely damaging to the fragile human mind.
When a person experiences betrayal they must then learn how best to deal with this and attempt to move on, but that person will then be cautious of further betrayal because that is how we learn. This learning curve is difficult and tedious as it can leave the person overly paranoid, anxious of further wrongdoings as trust is after all a challenging quality to possess. What also tends to happen is the person that has suffered a blow to their trust in another causing them to shut down morally and blindly continue to trust their betrayer. Why people do this is complicated to answer, the person may not be confident and rather insecure so they do not feel brave enough to declare it as wrong and allow it to happen again. However, every person has their limitations when their feelings and trust are tested some people take longer than others to muster the strength to walk away.
The mistake people often make is to enclose their feelings towards bad experiences and fool themselves into thinking that they have moved forward. This can be somewhat detrimental to the wellbeing of said persons mind. Openly discussing bad experiences and the emotions they bring forward helps to create a better perspective on what may have caused them, how better to deal with them if they were to happen again and also how to prevent them from actually happening again.
This is why I am not a fan of positive quotes as I feel they mask rather than aid the repair of past traumas. People often say you should not dwell on your past as it disables you from moving forward, I only partially agree with this as sometimes issues in your present may be the result of issues in your past that have not been analysed and dealt with accordingly. You should only move forward when these issues have been dealt with and even then, never forget as it helped you to learn. Sometimes you have to be cautious and aware otherwise we would all be running around blindly making the same mistakes repeatedly.

Ponder
03-25-2015, 04:41 PM
Hi Kawaii,

I'm really interested in what your writing here. I have learned a lot about the benefits of letting go. (beyond the cliche it's typically known for) Also known as letting go of or "our story/'s" Other terms that come to mind our Clinging, Addiction, Craving, Attachments and so on. However during all this learning among much of my resistance to crawling out of my hole ... I feel strongly ... or more that some kind of creative spirit that wells within me ... questions the balance to all these approaches - [more over detaching] by focusing on phrases such as "drawing from the well".

The well? Now I think of the water quality - Level of water - Our Thirst - quenching - and so on ...

For Me ... it's all in the drawing (yet another spin off from the well into manifesting)

The re-telling as well ... much is in that. I often write about the same things - but whilst yet drawing from the same place I do indeed detach and let go of the bucket in order to quench my thirst.

It's not one way or the other with regards to "Forget the past & Move On" albeit that's not what is commonly preach but said another different way. There is certainly a GLITCH to the clinical approach such as mindfulness (clinically taught) in its watered down state, but for me it does present more of a lasting challenge as opposed to CBT. Management strategies are beneficial (I mean not to say they aren't)

____________________________

Anyways - I only meant to say I really like where your going with this ... and that I was not myself charged enough to comment. Instead, you have given me much to think about and passionately as it triggered me, I thought out loud.

Good stuff ... TY


would love to hear more or if there is something you don't understand with what I said or simply see another path ... please do ask or comment ... please do continue in your own way as was really a great read. Is a really great topic. Thanks again.

Kawaii
03-25-2015, 09:50 PM
I'm glad you enjoyed it! I like writing and putting my thoughts/opinions out there to spark debate and a different perspective!
I may indeed write on another topic and see what I can draw from it. The world after all cannot simply just be looked at one way, as society wants it to be. It isn't black and white but more a broad spectrum of colours and shades. Things must always be questioned!
It is how we progress! :)

Im-Suffering
03-25-2015, 09:55 PM
I'm glad you enjoyed it! I like writing and putting my thoughts/opinions out there to spark debate and a different perspective!
I may indeed write on another topic and see what I can draw from it. The world after all cannot simply just be looked at one way, as society wants it to be. It isn't black and white but more a broad spectrum of colours and shades. Things must always be questioned!
It is how we progress! :)

Wonderful insights Kawaii :) TY

missedlink
07-24-2015, 12:15 PM
you don't have to forget the past. You have to acknowledge it and learn from it... and go on :)