Volatile

[sae]

I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression but I swear I am normally the most even keel person I know (we'll as far as anyone else sees anyways). I take great strides to not react to the depressive or anxious thoughts. Even still I have on rare occasion something that slips through. It's like a mini break down I guess. I don't know what it is.
An example if this: I am showing the boyfriend something and he loses interest in what I am saying, reminds me that I have left the cream cheese out. My mind, being completely focused on the other task, locks up. All logical thought comes to a grinding halt, confused. So what does oh so logical Sae do? I start crying uncontrollably because I lost my train of thought.
I can't seem to control the volatile moments. They last all of 2-5 minutes and leave as suddenly as they appear. Unfortunately as I approach the anniversary of my husband's death they are much more frequent. I can't stand them. They leave me embarrassed and emotionally exhausted. Is this common with anxiety? How does one prevent these volatile moments from ocurring?

[gadguy]

I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression but I swear I am normally the most even keel person I know (we'll as far as anyone else sees anyways). I take great strides to not react to the depressive or anxious thoughts. Even still I have on rare occasion something that slips through. It's like a mini break down I guess. I don't know what it is.
An example if this: I am showing the boyfriend something and he loses interest in what I am saying, reminds me that I have left the cream cheese out. My mind, being completely focused on the other task, locks up. All logical thought comes to a grinding halt, confused. So what does oh so logical Sae do? I start crying uncontrollably because I lost my train of thought.
I can't seem to control the volatile moments. They last all of 2-5 minutes and leave as suddenly as they appear. Unfortunately as I approach the anniversary of my husband's death they are much more frequent. I can't stand them. They leave me embarrassed and emotionally exhausted. Is this common with anxiety? How does one prevent these volatile moments from ocurring?

Yes this is very common, I get burst of anger over the little-lest thing, totally not my normal easy going personality. The more stressed I am the more common. There is nothing to be embarrassed about. How does one prevent them?? I guess its different for everyone, but I can tell its going to happen...if possible i remove myself from view and seek solitude a safe place. If i am at work, my car or restroom or vacant office, I stay until i can collect myself, other times I go home if its really bad, its my safe place. I wish you peace.

[sae]

Thank you :) It's good to find commonality. I suppose you can say it embarrasses me mostly because of the past decade of struggling to not react. Without going into a long diatribe about a sustained abusive marriage (cue cheesy Lifetime movie music), let's just say things like aggravation were highly frowned upon.
I married young, completely skipping over the dating thing. This is my first real foray into the dating world, and I am going into it like a one armed third string quarterback. The last thing I need is for dude to think he'S getting wrapped up in another "crazy woman". I'm not exactly off to a good start but he's been pretty amazing at helping too.