jww
08-11-2008, 06:04 AM
ok here goes:
Exccuse me if I use this as a therapy session of sorts but heres my story.
I am 52 yrs old and have been in excellent health with lots of energy and most would describe as a very easy going care free person all my life. All that changed around april of this year and I wll attempt to put into context how this started and where I am now.
Background - the last yr has certaianly had it stresses.
1.In feb of 07 my 19 yr old son was randomly assaulted and nearly killed. we got the call no one wants at 3 in the morning to get to the hospital not knowing during the 2 hr drive if he would be alive when we got there. He survived after 2 weeks in the hospital where he was treated for skull fractures and brain injuries. he has since nearly completely recovered but is deaf in his right ear and can no longer play college football. he is now a student coach and making deans list.I do not knowingly sit around thinking about it but I still wake up every morning at 3 am and always have my clothes ready to go beside the bed.
2. My wife had a 2 week period where they thought she had breast cancer and while it finally turned out she didn't I can not tell you what those 2 weeks were like.
3. my job has recently changed due to the real estate slow down I went back to my previous career as an emergency roon r.n. after being out of the hospital for 8 years. My life went from working at home at a leisurely pace to right back into a very emotionally and physically stressful job.
despite all of this I had adjusted and I felt good and thought I had weathered the storms.
THEN:
In april I had some tingling in my fingers that and mri showed was due to cervical disk problems ( I had this for years but managed with few symptoms). The doctor put me on a steriod dose pack and ALL HELL BROKE LOSE!. Within 2 days I was sweating like a pig, heart pounding could not sleep and felt like i was going to catch on fire. I also at times could not breathe. Being an r.n. I know some of this is to be expected but I FELT AWFUL. I finished the does pak and 2 days later I could not get up enough energy to get off the couch. I was so sick I asked my wife to take me to the er I thought I was going to die. She would not and said just let the meds get out for your system. 2 days later on monday Iwent to the doctor emergently. I woke up that morning and could not breathe and my chest was killing me. After a battery of blood test ekgs and a stress test I heard these words " YOU HAVE GENERAL ANXIETY DISORDER" Now as a 52 yr old healthy happy male who only saw a dr once a year for a physical and was on no meds this did not make since to me. I mean I thought about stuff every now and then but not more than ususal I thought.He gave me a few 12 to be exact xanax and started lexapro.
THEN:
I took a half xanax and within a short time it was like the pressure released and I felt like me again. I started the lexapro and after 2 weeks it kicked in and I can not begin to tell you how bad it made me feel. No sleep no interest in anything sex golf you name it I tried but just didn't care. It was lie somebody else was in my body. I also at times felt like I was on speed and once again sweated and had hot flashes. I tried another 2 weeks and then just quit the stuff felt bad a few days and then slowly started coming back to normal.
NOW:
Continuing to improve but still have never been back to the pre steriod me. I have periods of fatigue that just show up during the day usually preceeded by that slightly tight feeling in my upper body that almost tingles. Most days I can work through it and make it throught the day.
Some days I take half a xanax and amazingly I feel normal and my energy level goes back up ( I always thought xanax made you sleepy and tired?)
Whats weird is the spells when they come just show up most times I am not thinking about anything. The good news is I feel a little better every day and I am back to about 80% of what I felt like earlier.I have made a pact with myself to not take the xanax any more frequent than every 3 days if needed and keep trying to make that more days apart.
Well any way thats my story feel free to comment I have read others on here and see what a huge issue this is and by the way I apologize to anyone taking meds, you see I was on of those pull your self out of this you big baby types that thought it was all a crock but when it happened to me now I understand.
In hindsight and this is just my opinion - I think I did not deal with a lot of the stress over the last year openly and just kept trying to move on till my body just sort of shut down.
Exccuse me if I use this as a therapy session of sorts but heres my story.
I am 52 yrs old and have been in excellent health with lots of energy and most would describe as a very easy going care free person all my life. All that changed around april of this year and I wll attempt to put into context how this started and where I am now.
Background - the last yr has certaianly had it stresses.
1.In feb of 07 my 19 yr old son was randomly assaulted and nearly killed. we got the call no one wants at 3 in the morning to get to the hospital not knowing during the 2 hr drive if he would be alive when we got there. He survived after 2 weeks in the hospital where he was treated for skull fractures and brain injuries. he has since nearly completely recovered but is deaf in his right ear and can no longer play college football. he is now a student coach and making deans list.I do not knowingly sit around thinking about it but I still wake up every morning at 3 am and always have my clothes ready to go beside the bed.
2. My wife had a 2 week period where they thought she had breast cancer and while it finally turned out she didn't I can not tell you what those 2 weeks were like.
3. my job has recently changed due to the real estate slow down I went back to my previous career as an emergency roon r.n. after being out of the hospital for 8 years. My life went from working at home at a leisurely pace to right back into a very emotionally and physically stressful job.
despite all of this I had adjusted and I felt good and thought I had weathered the storms.
THEN:
In april I had some tingling in my fingers that and mri showed was due to cervical disk problems ( I had this for years but managed with few symptoms). The doctor put me on a steriod dose pack and ALL HELL BROKE LOSE!. Within 2 days I was sweating like a pig, heart pounding could not sleep and felt like i was going to catch on fire. I also at times could not breathe. Being an r.n. I know some of this is to be expected but I FELT AWFUL. I finished the does pak and 2 days later I could not get up enough energy to get off the couch. I was so sick I asked my wife to take me to the er I thought I was going to die. She would not and said just let the meds get out for your system. 2 days later on monday Iwent to the doctor emergently. I woke up that morning and could not breathe and my chest was killing me. After a battery of blood test ekgs and a stress test I heard these words " YOU HAVE GENERAL ANXIETY DISORDER" Now as a 52 yr old healthy happy male who only saw a dr once a year for a physical and was on no meds this did not make since to me. I mean I thought about stuff every now and then but not more than ususal I thought.He gave me a few 12 to be exact xanax and started lexapro.
THEN:
I took a half xanax and within a short time it was like the pressure released and I felt like me again. I started the lexapro and after 2 weeks it kicked in and I can not begin to tell you how bad it made me feel. No sleep no interest in anything sex golf you name it I tried but just didn't care. It was lie somebody else was in my body. I also at times felt like I was on speed and once again sweated and had hot flashes. I tried another 2 weeks and then just quit the stuff felt bad a few days and then slowly started coming back to normal.
NOW:
Continuing to improve but still have never been back to the pre steriod me. I have periods of fatigue that just show up during the day usually preceeded by that slightly tight feeling in my upper body that almost tingles. Most days I can work through it and make it throught the day.
Some days I take half a xanax and amazingly I feel normal and my energy level goes back up ( I always thought xanax made you sleepy and tired?)
Whats weird is the spells when they come just show up most times I am not thinking about anything. The good news is I feel a little better every day and I am back to about 80% of what I felt like earlier.I have made a pact with myself to not take the xanax any more frequent than every 3 days if needed and keep trying to make that more days apart.
Well any way thats my story feel free to comment I have read others on here and see what a huge issue this is and by the way I apologize to anyone taking meds, you see I was on of those pull your self out of this you big baby types that thought it was all a crock but when it happened to me now I understand.
In hindsight and this is just my opinion - I think I did not deal with a lot of the stress over the last year openly and just kept trying to move on till my body just sort of shut down.