BeckaL
01-16-2015, 06:34 PM
Hi everyone.
looking back, im positive my anxiety started at high school. I had a small group of friends who I loved dearly. They always encouraged me to talk to new people but I couldn't. The thought terrified me. I wasn't popular at school yet rumours spread about me. I think thats when things started to get bad. ( to clarify - I was never bullied at school) walking through the hallways or sitting in class I felt like everyone was staring at me. I stopped going to school. it got so bad that my English teacher asked my friends if I had a mental illness because I was never there. I moved house after that terrible year of school and it got worse. I would lock myself in my room for days. Not being able to get out of bed. My brother was out making new friends and I was crying every night because I couldn't have that. its got worse as the years went on l. I turned 18 and the thought of going out drinking terrified me. Seeing people i used to know. I tried to explain to my friend and she told me i was being stupid. Im nearly 20 and ive still not been out to celebrate my 18th. I had my first panic attack a few weeks agp at a job interview and it was one of the scariest things. It lasted around 5 minutes but that 5 minutes may of well been 5 hours. I went home and brokedown. I told my mum everything. my step dad has really bad anxiety and now him and my mum think I have it. I know I need to go to the doctors to get properly diagnosed but im so scared.
looking back, im positive my anxiety started at high school. I had a small group of friends who I loved dearly. They always encouraged me to talk to new people but I couldn't. The thought terrified me. I wasn't popular at school yet rumours spread about me. I think thats when things started to get bad. ( to clarify - I was never bullied at school) walking through the hallways or sitting in class I felt like everyone was staring at me. I stopped going to school. it got so bad that my English teacher asked my friends if I had a mental illness because I was never there. I moved house after that terrible year of school and it got worse. I would lock myself in my room for days. Not being able to get out of bed. My brother was out making new friends and I was crying every night because I couldn't have that. its got worse as the years went on l. I turned 18 and the thought of going out drinking terrified me. Seeing people i used to know. I tried to explain to my friend and she told me i was being stupid. Im nearly 20 and ive still not been out to celebrate my 18th. I had my first panic attack a few weeks agp at a job interview and it was one of the scariest things. It lasted around 5 minutes but that 5 minutes may of well been 5 hours. I went home and brokedown. I told my mum everything. my step dad has really bad anxiety and now him and my mum think I have it. I know I need to go to the doctors to get properly diagnosed but im so scared.