azure drake ATM
01-15-2015, 09:25 PM
I have been working hard at improving my mood, and trying to be less anxious socially. Today, I was presented with a stressful event at work. I was immediately snapped to alertness. I felt my mind turning and worrying and problem-solving and questioning.
It is a state of mind that is familiar to me for all the bad feelings it has caused as much as it helped me be alert to what's happening around me.
And then i remembered, the last few days were not stressful, I wasn't anxious, I managed social interactions well. I was at ease.
And I wasn't aware of it while it was happening. I missed it.
Thinking back i wasn't upset, but I wasn't especially happy either. Considering how well it was going, i would've thought it would have been a time to relish, cherish, and to revel in. But i wasn't aware of it until it was gone.
Have others experienced this? Does it have a name? Are the conditions of being alert and aware and being at ease and happy exclusive to each other? If no, how do i learn to be alert and aware but not anxious and stressed?
It is a state of mind that is familiar to me for all the bad feelings it has caused as much as it helped me be alert to what's happening around me.
And then i remembered, the last few days were not stressful, I wasn't anxious, I managed social interactions well. I was at ease.
And I wasn't aware of it while it was happening. I missed it.
Thinking back i wasn't upset, but I wasn't especially happy either. Considering how well it was going, i would've thought it would have been a time to relish, cherish, and to revel in. But i wasn't aware of it until it was gone.
Have others experienced this? Does it have a name? Are the conditions of being alert and aware and being at ease and happy exclusive to each other? If no, how do i learn to be alert and aware but not anxious and stressed?