I am having the worst morning!

[aml0017]

I practically woke up with a panic attack this morning! What a horrible way to wake up. I was so disoriented it took me a few minutes to reassure myself I wasn't in any danger. When it finally passed I just started crying it was such a relief.

On the one hand I want to curl up in a ball and go back to bed and never leave. On the other I want to get to work asap. Truthfully I have been so busy this week that work has been my refuge. Eight hours of no anxiety, my thoughts are so consumed with the job.

Supposed to start getting really cold tonight, so gonna be confined to the house a couple days. Normally my house is my comfort zone but lately all my triggers were things involving my house, or items in my house breaking and changing. I really hate it but can't really avoid it.

I am wondering if SAD is in play here. I always thought of my year-end anxiety as related to the holidays. Maybe not. I have anxiety year round but maybe the season is exacerbating it.

[Im-Suffering]

I practically woke up with a panic attack this morning! What a horrible way to wake up. I was so disoriented it took me a few minutes to reassure myself I wasn't in any danger. When it finally passed I just started crying it was such a relief.

On the one hand I want to curl up in a ball and go back to bed and never leave. On the other I want to get to work asap. Truthfully I have been so busy this week that work has been my refuge. Eight hours of no anxiety, my thoughts are so consumed with the job.

Supposed to start getting really cold tonight, so gonna be confined to the house a couple days. Normally my house is my comfort zone but lately all my triggers were things involving my house, or items in my house breaking and changing. I really hate it but can't really avoid it.

I am wondering if SAD is in play here. I always thought of my year-end anxiety as related to the holidays. Maybe not. I have anxiety year round but maybe the season is exacerbating it.

Your year round anxiety is related to unsolved problems. The breaking of the house symbolizes as you intuitively reasoned, a time for change. When you are sleeping, you are projecting the psyche into the future and playing with probabilities. Deciding what course to take. The protected areas of the dream-state provide solace from the worldly issues and an environment to test out theories. The shock of the morning as the psyche wakes up to a world not to its liking is what you feel as anxiety. Another words, into a personal world where the same problems exist without any conscious recognition of how to solve them in the correct manner.

The seasonal changes as well reflect the inner landscape as you wrestle with these problems and decide to take action. You ebb and flow with them. Only when you decide to face and discover an appropriate course of action, and start to act on it, will you realize what has been before you all along. (the solutions). And the power in the self to believe in you. To love yourself.