amielou
12-28-2014, 08:42 AM
Bit of a problem for me this one, a few weeks ago I started feeling really anxious and paranoid again about some friends, convincing myself that no one liked me and that no one wanted to be my friend. I've been having a hard time with not having a job and not having anywhere to live so I guess its understandable that I would start to get anxious and depressed again. The only problem is i'm not sure if the problems I seem to be having with my friends are real or whether they're in my head. My best friend had a really stressful few weeks at work before Christmas, I hardly heard from her during that time and she always seemed to be busy when I tried to arrange seeing her. The logical side of my brain tells me that i'm being over sensitive and she didn't have a lot of time, that not everything is about me! I saw her just before Christmas and last night and I felt so awkward because I thought she was mad at me that I think I made it awkward between us. I can't work out whether she is mad at me and is being weird with me or if the fact that i'm thinking she's mad at me is making me weird! Oh god this hurts my brain! She's not an affectionate kind of friend, you know she's never gonna be someone whose all huggy and 'i love you' and I think when i'm feeling anxious I need reassurance that she likes me, however her way to deal with things is to be very practical and 'whats the solution'. Does anybody else ever wonder whether it's just a vicious circle? Your worried that someone doesn't like you and it's going to be weird when you see them, but you feel so anxious about it that you actually make it weird when you see them and then think you've been proved right that they don't like you and feel awkward around you?