shadwell10201
12-11-2014, 08:45 AM
Hello,
I've had Anxiety/Social anxiety now since I was in elementary school. Growing up, it was never really much of a problem and to be honest, I didn't even know I had any form of Anxiety. The only thing was that I was nervous all the time, I didn't like certain social situations, and I had the physical symptoms (mainly heart pumping, sweating, etc.) well fast forward to 25 yrs old and I've had this main anxiety issue now for about 4 yrs: hand shaking.
I'm doing OK with my anxiety in general...I don't fear social situations, talking to people, etc. I don't mind crowds. I can get through it. BUT...it's this hand shaking issue that's only gotten worse. I basically have a phobia of eating around anyone other than my immediate family. I know this sounds crazy, but it all started when I met my wife 4 yrs ago. We were dating and I had gone to her place for dinner. I went to pick up my fork and I noticed my hand had a tremor, a shake. I was like "wow, where did that come from?"
Ever since that day I can't get the thought out of my head. Anytime I have to use a single hand to do something, there's a tremor. I refuse to eat food around anyone except myself or my immediate family. I think part of it is in my head, basically I'm always thinking about it telling myself my hand is going to shake...maybe if the thought wasn't there at all, I'd have no tremor.
Just as an example, kind of like someone feeding you some weird meat and telling you it's chicken...Well you thought it tasted pretty darn good because you thought it was Chicken! If that person had told you it was some weird meat you'd think it was disgusting, strange, etc.
However, it's only 50% in my head because I've had multiple situations where I actually do have an involuntary hand tremor, mostly at impromptu dinner invites, or regular dinner where I have to sit around a bunch of people I don't know well enough...One time I was at a Subway and thought I could fill up my soda without shaking...My hand's shook so badly the soda spilled out of the cup all over the floor...extremely embarrassing, I was shaking, sweating, heart pounding, etc. I know this is all pretty stupid, and I understand that...but I just can't get this thought of my hands shaking out my head...I can't even eat lunch at work anymore, write something, etc. It sucks. It's starting to ruin my life now...People are starting to think I'm a jerk because I refuse to eat or drink or use my hands for anything around them...
I know this is all really stupid and I want to get over and beat this but the anxiety just takes over every time! I'm starting to get stressed because Christmas is around the corner and that means holiday party's...Most people are so happy around this time of year but instead I'm stressing out about eating in front of others which is really dumb.
I have spoken to my dr who prescribed me about 7 different anti-depressants which didn't do anything except make the symptoms worse. He also prescribed Lorazepam which was basically a sugar pill for me at least...didn't do anything. Then we tried Inderal which seems promising but I can't tell if it works or not...
I just feel so stuck and annoyed with my symptoms. Anybody else have any similar issues?
I've had Anxiety/Social anxiety now since I was in elementary school. Growing up, it was never really much of a problem and to be honest, I didn't even know I had any form of Anxiety. The only thing was that I was nervous all the time, I didn't like certain social situations, and I had the physical symptoms (mainly heart pumping, sweating, etc.) well fast forward to 25 yrs old and I've had this main anxiety issue now for about 4 yrs: hand shaking.
I'm doing OK with my anxiety in general...I don't fear social situations, talking to people, etc. I don't mind crowds. I can get through it. BUT...it's this hand shaking issue that's only gotten worse. I basically have a phobia of eating around anyone other than my immediate family. I know this sounds crazy, but it all started when I met my wife 4 yrs ago. We were dating and I had gone to her place for dinner. I went to pick up my fork and I noticed my hand had a tremor, a shake. I was like "wow, where did that come from?"
Ever since that day I can't get the thought out of my head. Anytime I have to use a single hand to do something, there's a tremor. I refuse to eat food around anyone except myself or my immediate family. I think part of it is in my head, basically I'm always thinking about it telling myself my hand is going to shake...maybe if the thought wasn't there at all, I'd have no tremor.
Just as an example, kind of like someone feeding you some weird meat and telling you it's chicken...Well you thought it tasted pretty darn good because you thought it was Chicken! If that person had told you it was some weird meat you'd think it was disgusting, strange, etc.
However, it's only 50% in my head because I've had multiple situations where I actually do have an involuntary hand tremor, mostly at impromptu dinner invites, or regular dinner where I have to sit around a bunch of people I don't know well enough...One time I was at a Subway and thought I could fill up my soda without shaking...My hand's shook so badly the soda spilled out of the cup all over the floor...extremely embarrassing, I was shaking, sweating, heart pounding, etc. I know this is all pretty stupid, and I understand that...but I just can't get this thought of my hands shaking out my head...I can't even eat lunch at work anymore, write something, etc. It sucks. It's starting to ruin my life now...People are starting to think I'm a jerk because I refuse to eat or drink or use my hands for anything around them...
I know this is all really stupid and I want to get over and beat this but the anxiety just takes over every time! I'm starting to get stressed because Christmas is around the corner and that means holiday party's...Most people are so happy around this time of year but instead I'm stressing out about eating in front of others which is really dumb.
I have spoken to my dr who prescribed me about 7 different anti-depressants which didn't do anything except make the symptoms worse. He also prescribed Lorazepam which was basically a sugar pill for me at least...didn't do anything. Then we tried Inderal which seems promising but I can't tell if it works or not...
I just feel so stuck and annoyed with my symptoms. Anybody else have any similar issues?