Ollie T
12-05-2014, 11:04 AM
Hi everyone,
First off I would like to say thank you to everyone here for the support you give, I think it is a truly incredible and brave thing to do to come forward and open up about things like this, and I appreciate everyone who is able to give their help and advice to others on this forum.
My girlfriend and I have been together for a little over 4 months, and although at first I was unaware of it (we met on an expedition), I discovered that she suffers from anxiety as a result of severe chronic back pain. She struggled alot with the pain and found it extremely difficult to continue living a normal life and ended up missing almost a year of school. As she has slowly recovered, she has been able to gradually do more and more, but as a result of being unable to leave her house for extended periods of time, she developed social anxiety.
From my own reading and research, her anxiety is not severe, but it is still something she struggles with. She is extremely strong-willed and is slowly regaining confidence in seeing her friends, but she has trouble committing to anything and often cancels any plans last-minute, especially with me. Before I realised what the anxiety was, I would get quite frustrated that she never wanted to see me or do anything, but now I am beginning to understand what she was going through.
I personally have difficulty opening up and expressing emotion, but I have been able to talk to her better than with anyone before, and although sometimes she gets confused about her feelings, we do love each other and I want to be able to understand better. I don't want to try and directly help, as I have quite an overbearing tendency to try and 'fix things', but at the same time I don't want to lose her by not being supportive enough. It still does hurt that I can't see her and do things when I want to, even though I do understand why and do not blame her, but I feel like there must be something I can do to help her through it so that she won't have to suffer with it any further.
Ultimately I love her extremely much and I would just like to be able to understand what I can do to be there for her and best help her regain confidence in herself.
Thanks again,
Ollie
First off I would like to say thank you to everyone here for the support you give, I think it is a truly incredible and brave thing to do to come forward and open up about things like this, and I appreciate everyone who is able to give their help and advice to others on this forum.
My girlfriend and I have been together for a little over 4 months, and although at first I was unaware of it (we met on an expedition), I discovered that she suffers from anxiety as a result of severe chronic back pain. She struggled alot with the pain and found it extremely difficult to continue living a normal life and ended up missing almost a year of school. As she has slowly recovered, she has been able to gradually do more and more, but as a result of being unable to leave her house for extended periods of time, she developed social anxiety.
From my own reading and research, her anxiety is not severe, but it is still something she struggles with. She is extremely strong-willed and is slowly regaining confidence in seeing her friends, but she has trouble committing to anything and often cancels any plans last-minute, especially with me. Before I realised what the anxiety was, I would get quite frustrated that she never wanted to see me or do anything, but now I am beginning to understand what she was going through.
I personally have difficulty opening up and expressing emotion, but I have been able to talk to her better than with anyone before, and although sometimes she gets confused about her feelings, we do love each other and I want to be able to understand better. I don't want to try and directly help, as I have quite an overbearing tendency to try and 'fix things', but at the same time I don't want to lose her by not being supportive enough. It still does hurt that I can't see her and do things when I want to, even though I do understand why and do not blame her, but I feel like there must be something I can do to help her through it so that she won't have to suffer with it any further.
Ultimately I love her extremely much and I would just like to be able to understand what I can do to be there for her and best help her regain confidence in herself.
Thanks again,
Ollie