Shahad
12-04-2014, 07:01 PM
Hi, I'm here because I feel I need to reach out and perhaps harbor some advice. I don't know if I am in the right place or not, but I'm obviously here.
I'm currently feeling really bad at this moment and do not know why i am feeling this way, when I should be happy with my life.
The feeling of loss, the unknown, and doubt are making me feel physically sick to the pit of my stomach. It is very difficult to deal with and I'm not sure how to cope now. I am not diagnosed with any medical conditions and never have been. The constant state of worry and paranoia makes it feel like i do not have control of my own life.
I believe my problems arose when my wife of several years cheated on me with her ex. This happened 17 months ago. At this point in time we broke up and decided to remain together after lots of talking and realization that we love each other dearly. How this incident happened is difficult to explain and we have forgiven each other. However, it still feels I cannot put this point in time to rest.
I imagine various different scenarios in everyday life that she is still cheating. I feel she still is, but know deep down she is not. I have not talked with her because of the fear of loss and not knowing how to approach this. because circumstances are changing in life daily i find it hard to not think about the past. the smallest of things slightly out of how I imagine things should be triggers the events of the past. I keep silent and not mention it to avoid conflict.
I tell myself that I have forgiven her and have done so with her but this doesn't seem to be true.
i really do not know what to do it is eating me alive and I know life is good.
I'm currently feeling really bad at this moment and do not know why i am feeling this way, when I should be happy with my life.
The feeling of loss, the unknown, and doubt are making me feel physically sick to the pit of my stomach. It is very difficult to deal with and I'm not sure how to cope now. I am not diagnosed with any medical conditions and never have been. The constant state of worry and paranoia makes it feel like i do not have control of my own life.
I believe my problems arose when my wife of several years cheated on me with her ex. This happened 17 months ago. At this point in time we broke up and decided to remain together after lots of talking and realization that we love each other dearly. How this incident happened is difficult to explain and we have forgiven each other. However, it still feels I cannot put this point in time to rest.
I imagine various different scenarios in everyday life that she is still cheating. I feel she still is, but know deep down she is not. I have not talked with her because of the fear of loss and not knowing how to approach this. because circumstances are changing in life daily i find it hard to not think about the past. the smallest of things slightly out of how I imagine things should be triggers the events of the past. I keep silent and not mention it to avoid conflict.
I tell myself that I have forgiven her and have done so with her but this doesn't seem to be true.
i really do not know what to do it is eating me alive and I know life is good.