Should I see a doctor? Rational people help please...

[Jess Watkins]

The only reason why I am asking this is because I want a rational person's opinion... ;)

Okay, I am a major hypochondriac (and everyone who knows me knows this) and so whenever I bring up something I am concerned to them about they blow it off and chalk it up to just anxiety. But I have noticed I have been experiencing very strange symptoms over the course of about two months and I just want someone else's thoughts. I'll try to make this short because I know no one likes toilet paper roll posts.

It all started back in mid September. My mom had just died in August from cancer and I was re-cuperating from the stress of watching her suffer and being her caregiver. Things were looking good, I was thinking about getting a job and getting my life started again. Then one night I started to twitch involuntary all over my body. My fingers, legs, stomach, head. It was very scary. Then I began to have weird head pain in the very back of my skull. It was like a dull ache. Not very painful, but I noticed it nonetheless. Then after a trip to to the doctor I was told it was nerves and was prescribed Paxil and Klonopin. I didn't take either and continued on with my life believing it was over. It was not.

Then in October I began to have heart flutters and noticed my BP was rather high in some instances. One night I believe it shot up to 135/85. My resting heartrate has been 80 for a long time (apparently not a good sign). Then that started all my heart worries. When I bend over or bend my left arm for an extended period of time, my heart skips. That makes me wonder if I have poor circulation or something. I also had a lump in my left leg near the knee cap which gave me fears I had a blood clot. The heart palps only fueled this fear as you can imagine.

Now today as I type this, I am having tingling sensations through my legs and hands. It kind of feels like static, like when you rub hair against a balloon. Or when your hair stands up in the cold. A few nights ago I had that feeling rumble through all parts of my body. It was so bad I was itchy.

And two nights ago I started having ice-pick headaches. They are sharp but short shots of pain in one spot of your head. Mine was happening on the right side of my forehead.

I just keep believing something is wrong, and my worst fear is that something really is wrong and the time that something really bad happens to me (stroke, collapse) it will be too late. I am terrified of that. The worst part is I am a Christian. I'm not supposed to fear death--but I do. It makes me want to cry. My family is not as neurotic as I am, so I can't just tell them to take me to the doctor unless something is really wrong--which also frustrates me. I don't want to wait until it's too late.

So, what do you think? How can I communicate my fears to my family without them brushing me off?

[Jess Watkins]

Something else that has been causing me worry is that when I was seventeen I struggled with anorexia and lost 41 lbs within six months (or something like that, can't really remember) and when I started to recover I ate loads of high in fat foods like ice-cream and sauces...I would slather all my food in chocolate syrups and gravy and ranch dressings. One time I consumed an entire carton of Dryer's peppermint ice-cream in a single night! A few weeks after eating like that, I woke up with crushing chest pain, and I'm talking bad. It hurt so much it radiated up to my jaws and I felt like I couldn't breathe. This happened about three times upon waking up in one month. It scared me very much. I didn't tell anyone because I didn't want to scare them. Now I am regretting it because I believe I damaged my heart during my post-anorexic fat intake. I did not take care of myself. I am twenty-one now and I keep experiencing heart palpitations and sometimes my jaw gets a dull ache. This has just started happening last week. Did I have a heart attack?

[Im-Suffering]

My family is not as neurotic as I am, so I can't just tell them to take me to the doctor unless something is really wrong--which also frustrates me. I don't want to wait until it's too late.

"A few weeks after eating like that, I woke up with crushing chest pain, and I'm talking bad. It hurt so much it radiated up to my jaws and I felt like I couldn't breathe. "

So, what do you think? How can I communicate my fears to my family without them brushing me off?

Get yourself into a doctors office for a complete physical and describe what you have just posted. Your old enough that you need no ones approval. I have nothing else to say. Nothing else can be said. It is wrong on so many levels.

You are valuable, period. Therefore communicate your fears to a therapist, a friendly ear, or someone who will listen. The importance of your self-hood, who you are, is not in the hands of your family and their judgments or criticism. And neither is your transportation should you need help.