View Full Version : Was doing OK for a while
Jessicaleanne1992
10-17-2014, 06:02 AM
I'm back. I was doing so well for a little bit. My dr upped my Prozac dosage from 40mg to 60mg daily and I got a new job which helped with the anxiety/depression. But, school started back (I'm a full time college student) and my new job has become very frustrating because I've been filling in so I'm working full time. Which upsets me now because i knew I couldn't work full time at this point in my life. That why I applied part time. But I also don't want to let my boss down, I beat out a good many other applicants so I'm thankful she chose me. And my bf of 4 months left me for someone else. That's the really kicker here. What has really sent me into a tailspin. I feel like I'm going crazy. I feel sad, angry, hopeless, anxious and scared all at the same time. I'm worried I won't find anything or anyone else that makes me happy. Idk what to do. I can't live life this way. How do you all cope with stress and feelings of hopelessness?
JustaGal
10-17-2014, 10:47 AM
I'm back. I was doing so well for a little bit. My dr upped my Prozac dosage from 40mg to 60mg daily and I got a new job which helped with the anxiety/depression. But, school started back (I'm a full time college student) and my new job has become very frustrating because I've been filling in so I'm working full time. Which upsets me now because i knew I couldn't work full time at this point in my life. That why I applied part time. But I also don't want to let my boss down, I beat out a good many other applicants so I'm thankful she chose me. And my bf of 4 months left me for someone else. That's the really kicker here. What has really sent me into a tailspin. I feel like I'm going crazy. I feel sad, angry, hopeless, anxious and scared all at the same time. I'm worried I won't find anything or anyone else that makes me happy. Idk what to do. I can't live life this way. How do you all cope with stress and feelings of hopelessness?
Cling to the hope that things will get better is what I do. Ride out the lowpoint.
leather_couch
10-17-2014, 12:16 PM
JessicaLeanne, I am very sorry to hear you are feeling so low. Although her advice was short and to the point, JustaGal hit on something important. Without hope, it is easy to forget the reality that life goes on and that there are many things that will, in time, be enjoyable. It's easy to lose sight of the good things in life when you are enveloped in despair. I remember years ago, during a bout of depression, I picked up a book written by a Roman Catholic priest about his own experience with the disorder. He described being so enveloped in a feeling of hopelessness that one night, that he missed something amazing, perhaps miraculous! The author was summoned to a hospital to baptize a dying baby. He described that when the water landed on the head of the barely breathing child, the child's skin began to regain - or perhaps gain for the first time - color. The child cried out and the doctors and nurses were able to preserve his life. Now, there could be a non-miraculous explanation for this, the author wrote, but regardless, he said his depression was so thick that in the midst of this great moment, he could not appreciate it. Depression is like that. It is a fog that rolls in and obscures reality. Add anxiety to it and you've got something even more intense. But be not dismayed, JessicaLeanne, because there are things that can be appreciated and enjoyed, both now and in the fullness of your life.
I would suggest finding something you like to do. Perhaps its something simple like listening to music. Maybe it's painting or walking. Doesn't matter. The key is something YOU LIKE TO DO that is simple and you experience in a non-judgmental way. If it's music, put some on and listen to it, rocking back and forth or perhaps dancing to yourself. Sure it sounds a little cooky, but you'd be surprised what this can do. If it's going for a walk, do just that. None of these things have to blow your mind or be really earth shattering or euphoric. You're depressed, so chances are, just getting up the motivation to do them is hard. Just try it though! Perhaps, despite the fog of your mood you may see through to the simple moments of solace and peace that even the depressed brain can recognize and appreciate and the spirit can thrive on. Love yourself as best as you can and ask yourself if you are loving yourself enough.
Good luck and keep in touch!
Jessicaleanne1992
10-18-2014, 01:05 PM
Thanks for the kind replies. I'm starting to realize this breakup is affecting me so much more than I was able to admit to even myself. I'm hurting and miserable. I guess time is the only fix.
Andrewk_
10-18-2014, 01:38 PM
Thanks for the kind replies. I'm starting to realize this breakup is affecting me so much more than I was able to admit to even myself. I'm hurting and miserable. I guess time is the only fix.
I dealt with anxiety for a long time as well, I recently went through a break up that mentally ruined me and I feel I'm worse off then I've ever been. I feel that, that was my trigger to send me back to feeling this way. I'm also hurting and miserable but ive been through this multiple times before thinking the same thiughts and I know it will
Get better. It's just hard and I get caught up in the moment from the lack of sleep and stress that I will never be calm once again.
Jessicaleanne1992
10-20-2014, 04:56 AM
I do not want to face the world today. I was up all night crying. And I couldn't sleep. Now that I have to leave for work all I want is to sleep. I'm so sleepy. Idk what to do anymore. I'm desperate.
Andrewk_
10-20-2014, 06:52 AM
I do not want to face the world today. I was up all night crying. And I couldn't sleep. Now that I have to leave for work all I want is to sleep. I'm so sleepy. Idk what to do anymore. I'm desperate.
I feel the same way almost every morning. I'm meeting with my doctor after work today hopefully we can figure something out. I want to just give up and sit at home everyday.
Exactice
10-20-2014, 05:03 PM
Hey Jessica! Congrats!..... Wait what? Congrats.... YES Congrats. Why Because you are still here and you are still fighting to get things straightened out.
You have faced some difficult times no doubt. Anyone in your shoes would feel the struggles and challenges that you face. But you need a pant on the back for realizing it....facing it and wanting to do something about it!
So dont be so hard on yourself. Be optimistic and look to the future. I am sorry you separated from someone that you thought would be good for your but rest assured. There are many fish in the sea. It just takes time just like the anxiety to find the right one/right thing to make you feel at your best!
Little steps and support from us! We are here for you!
As for the Meds, work it out! I have been on Fluoxetine (Prozac) for 6 months now.... It was crazy but it has helped I am stable now and working on staying positive so dont worry and dont give up!
Jessicaleanne1992
10-20-2014, 05:59 PM
I've been reading up on it and I'm starting to think I have borderline personality disorder along with anxiety. This "breakup" is effecting me so much more than it should. I'm sad. I can't eat. I can't focus. It would make sense. This disorder makes it hard for ppl to face rejection. And that's what's happening to me.
Jessicaleanne1992
10-20-2014, 06:09 PM
Does anyone have any experience with this?
Exactice
10-20-2014, 06:59 PM
Hey Jessica, please take my words with a grain of salt but as much respect as I have.
You have stated that you have anxiety and this anxiety brings on thoughts and OCD like feelings. Feelings like you need to figure out what is wrong with you. You have this symptom and that symptom or you suffer from type of disorder. This might and I say might be true but I doubt it.
You are going through a rough period. Being a women that feels emotion more so you are struggling with a break up! What you are feeling and the heartache is normal. ANY NORMAL HUMAN THAT LOVES would feel something like this. Anyone that can brush it off and move on to someone else is not worth your time and your feelings!
Morn, be sad. There is nothing wrong from that! What you now will do is, grow stronger and learn from this. There is nothing wrong with you. That person was not your knight and shining armor. No need to keep thinking they were. Now is your chance to find that person and really grow!
Again Take your time Jessica. Its ok to be sad and depressed at this time. But again look to the future! You will see that its so much better!
Jessicaleanne1992
10-21-2014, 04:36 AM
Hey Jessica, please take my words with a grain of salt but as much respect as I have.
You have stated that you have anxiety and this anxiety brings on thoughts and OCD like feelings. Feelings like you need to figure out what is wrong with you. You have this symptom and that symptom or you suffer from type of disorder. This might and I say might be true but I doubt it.
You are going through a rough period. Being a women that feels emotion more so you are struggling with a break up! What you are feeling and the heartache is normal. ANY NORMAL HUMAN THAT LOVES would feel something like this. Anyone that can brush it off and move on to someone else is not worth your time and your feelings!
Morn, be sad. There is nothing wrong from that! What you now will do is, grow stronger and learn from this. There is nothing wrong with you. That person was not your knight and shining armor. No need to keep thinking they were. Now is your chance to find that person and really grow!
Again Take your time Jessica. Its ok to be sad and depressed at this time. But again look to the future! You will see that its so much better!
Thank you very much. This is so sweet!
leather_couch
10-21-2014, 09:19 AM
I've been reading up on it and I'm starting to think I have borderline personality disorder along with anxiety. This "breakup" is effecting me so much more than it should. I'm sad. I can't eat. I can't focus. It would make sense. This disorder makes it hard for ppl to face rejection. And that's what's happening to me.
Jessica,one symptom of a ready at your fingers internet and anxiety is the ability to self-diagnose or look too far into things. One thing depression does is increase feelings of guilt and shame. Best advice is to take things a day at a time and for goodness sakes, see a doctor.
Jessicaleanne1992
10-22-2014, 01:02 AM
Best advice is to take things a day at a time and for goodness sakes, see a doctor.
Even though it probably wasn't intended to this little bit made me chuckle. It's good advice. And thank you for it. And for the laugh. You are all too kind.
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