TW4569
09-27-2014, 03:15 AM
Hi! I joined this forum to basically vent to people who have probably experienced the same things, and hopefully receive some advice on how to deal with anxiety. I apologise in advance for the long post, the important, current stuff is in the last paragraph.
First, some background. I'm a 22 year old male, and my journey with anxiety started about 4 years ago. I went to the ER one night at age 18 with shortness of breath accompanied by a "huge rubberband around the ribcage" feeling. Not yet knowing that these were physical symptoms caused by anxiety, I assumed something horrible was happening to my body. I spent a day in the hospital unable to experience the feelings while hooked up to machines that may be able to give the doctors clues as to what was going on. I assume I was less anxious because I was surrounded by medical professionals who would be able to jump in and save me if I had a medical issue. I had EKGs done, chest X-Rays, a heart ultrasound, I got a CT scan a few days after being discharged, and I saw a cardiologist. None of those things revealed any real issues.
I saw my GP shortly after and we eventually figured out that it may be anxiety. He prescribed me Citalopram (20mg, once daily) and sent me on my way. The chest tightness was drastically reduced from that point on. Honestly, although the medication may have helped, I think the knowledge that my symptoms really were just anxiety and not a physical ailment went a long way towards reducing my overall anxiety. Aside from the occasional heart palpitation and mild chest tightness, I was pretty much fine. Even if the physical stuff came back, knowing it was anxiety made it a lot less severe.
Recently, I had a huge negative event in life. My brother passed away at age 30 after a very brief illness on July 28th 2014. When my brother was in the hospital, we didn't really know if he was going to pull through or get worse. Obviously, it was quite a stressful time. I awoke on the morning of the 28th (before he passed) with a racing, pounding heart. I checked my heart rate with a portable blood pressure monitor and it was 106 (my resting heart rate is normally in the 70-80s, I'm out of shape). It was a horrible feeling.
I've always been a bit of a hypochondriac (I think it kind of goes hand in hand with anxiety.panic disorders), but my brother's premature death was a harsh reminder that death doesn't always wait until you're 90. I checked my blood pressure and heart rate obsessively, and was extremely sensitive to everything going on in my body. I eventually settled down after three weeks or so, I'm not as obsessive about the BP and heart rate, and my parents and I are kind of adjusting to our new normal without my brother.
Over the last couple weeks, I've started to have the physical symptoms again, always when I'm trying to sleep. I'll be laying in bed when suddenly my heart pounds and I'm short of breath. My mind goes into overdrive, "Is my heart going out? Will I suddenly drop dead for reasons yet unknown?" Sometimes I'll seem to be on the right track towards being able to get to sleep without it happening, but then I remember that I had a panic attack last night and I'll start paying attention to my heart beat. My mind screams, "No, no, think about something else! You are making this happen by thinking about it!" I'll try to distract myself by watching a video on my ipod (I have a couple seasons of TV shows on it), but the symptoms come anyway, and I'm stuck short of breath with a pounding heart until I finally fall asleep.
It's very aggravating, especially when your sleep schedule is already way out of whack. Does this happen to anyone else? What do you do about it?
First, some background. I'm a 22 year old male, and my journey with anxiety started about 4 years ago. I went to the ER one night at age 18 with shortness of breath accompanied by a "huge rubberband around the ribcage" feeling. Not yet knowing that these were physical symptoms caused by anxiety, I assumed something horrible was happening to my body. I spent a day in the hospital unable to experience the feelings while hooked up to machines that may be able to give the doctors clues as to what was going on. I assume I was less anxious because I was surrounded by medical professionals who would be able to jump in and save me if I had a medical issue. I had EKGs done, chest X-Rays, a heart ultrasound, I got a CT scan a few days after being discharged, and I saw a cardiologist. None of those things revealed any real issues.
I saw my GP shortly after and we eventually figured out that it may be anxiety. He prescribed me Citalopram (20mg, once daily) and sent me on my way. The chest tightness was drastically reduced from that point on. Honestly, although the medication may have helped, I think the knowledge that my symptoms really were just anxiety and not a physical ailment went a long way towards reducing my overall anxiety. Aside from the occasional heart palpitation and mild chest tightness, I was pretty much fine. Even if the physical stuff came back, knowing it was anxiety made it a lot less severe.
Recently, I had a huge negative event in life. My brother passed away at age 30 after a very brief illness on July 28th 2014. When my brother was in the hospital, we didn't really know if he was going to pull through or get worse. Obviously, it was quite a stressful time. I awoke on the morning of the 28th (before he passed) with a racing, pounding heart. I checked my heart rate with a portable blood pressure monitor and it was 106 (my resting heart rate is normally in the 70-80s, I'm out of shape). It was a horrible feeling.
I've always been a bit of a hypochondriac (I think it kind of goes hand in hand with anxiety.panic disorders), but my brother's premature death was a harsh reminder that death doesn't always wait until you're 90. I checked my blood pressure and heart rate obsessively, and was extremely sensitive to everything going on in my body. I eventually settled down after three weeks or so, I'm not as obsessive about the BP and heart rate, and my parents and I are kind of adjusting to our new normal without my brother.
Over the last couple weeks, I've started to have the physical symptoms again, always when I'm trying to sleep. I'll be laying in bed when suddenly my heart pounds and I'm short of breath. My mind goes into overdrive, "Is my heart going out? Will I suddenly drop dead for reasons yet unknown?" Sometimes I'll seem to be on the right track towards being able to get to sleep without it happening, but then I remember that I had a panic attack last night and I'll start paying attention to my heart beat. My mind screams, "No, no, think about something else! You are making this happen by thinking about it!" I'll try to distract myself by watching a video on my ipod (I have a couple seasons of TV shows on it), but the symptoms come anyway, and I'm stuck short of breath with a pounding heart until I finally fall asleep.
It's very aggravating, especially when your sleep schedule is already way out of whack. Does this happen to anyone else? What do you do about it?