Exactice
09-16-2014, 02:38 PM
Hey Gang! I just wanted to share an amazing experience with you all and hopefully if gives everyone some motivation. Sorry its a little long but Its worth it! I promise.
Ok so first off an update... Generally all has been ok... but my anxiety has gone up a little. I will say there has been a lot going on recently as you can tell by my absence from here and I apologize for that. Other than that I have been ok. Did a 6 months check with the doctor and he has recommended me to stay on the meds for another 6 months and I am ok with it!
Part 1 ( JUMP TO PART2 if its too long)
Ok so on to the meat and potatoes. I have recently take up surfing with my wife. She has been surfing for year. I have a been a body boarder for years but never surfed..... (weird right living in hawaii.... never surfed LOL... But I have been in the water my entire life.)
So anyways fast forward 2 months..... I have develop very well and gotten very strong in the water. Well Sunday dusk my wife went out to do a late after noon session. It was BIG.... a little uncomfortable big. Anyways it was so bad I told my wife to go inside, but for what ever reason, she stuck with me. Next thing you know she disappeared. Board was gone and I couldn't find her. I started to worry so I paddled like crazy look for her. Finally I see here bobbing barely above the water. the waves pounding her. I swim over and give her my board to float on so she doesnt drown. Remember though she has been surfing for years...so its not inexperience it was just huge!
So I tow her in to shore as we look for her board (Her leash snapped and broke) I am exhausted looking for board and towing here in. Finally we find it and all is good. Pretty much played lifeguard it was unreal. So you can imagine my anxiety and panic at that moment. But I dealt with it due to being focused on saving her. It was an amazing feeling.
PART 2
OK So no fast forward to yesterday. So the swell is still in and its still big. Anyways my wife said no dice she wanted to just swim. I wanted to surf. So I go out by myself this time. So I paddle out and its big but I am fine. I catch a couple small waves and then a Monster comes in. 10ft faces mind you....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHk23Rd1e0g - Give you an Idea
OK any ways I catch this awesome wave... I ride the snot out of it having a blast. Now to get off the wave you just usually just ditch the board and jump off, so I do. All of a sudden. My leg feels light...... My board is gone..... Now I am floating in the middle of the ocean no one is around and my board is floating away. Panic sets in.... and I am talking full blown panic attack. You know the hard to breath, cold tingling feeling. I mean full blown!!!!! I am treading water already having a hard time breathing due to the waves and now I am struggling to breath with the panic attack. In my mind I am think about screaming for help but no one is close enough to help. I am !@#$%.......
What do I do?..... well first things first fight or flight kicks on so I need to survive first. I flip over on my back and float for a moment, next I tell myself to breath and I have done this before so dont worry just focus on floating and breathing to get my heart rate back down. Slowly but surely I calm my self down somehow. Secondly I am telling myself. I have done this before.... no big deal I can do this. I saved my wife yesterday, its my turn to safe me.
I regain myself and start swimming in to look for my board. Now remember with a panic attack adrenaline is maxed out right.... I swam so fast and so hard I swam past my board not even realizing it. Until another surfer was coming in and yelled "Eh your board is back there" LOL So I was like WHAT!!! Anyways I swam to the board and my panic and anxiety lifted as I had a board to float on.
Now this was the turning point. After all this... what do you do? Go back in right, you had a rough nuts moment, your life actually was in danger but I was able to control the situation control myself and made all right. Why take any more chances? NO..... This was a turning point.... I needed to face it head on. So I went back out!!!!!! I went back out into the surf and surfed another 1hour before sundown and came in to meet my wife.
After all this I realized how beautiful and how amazing we humans really are. How we can conquer the most dangerous situations. I laugh now how stupid I have had panic attacks on land in the safety of my home..... Now those are nothing. I had a panic attack in the open ocean under huge swell conditions and I survived and even went back out..... PEOPLE YOU CAN DO IT!!! I KNOW YOU CAN!!! BELIEVE AND FOCUS ON WHAT WE HAVE PRACTICED. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
This was yesterday after all that mess....to remind me how beautiful it can be......
1458
Ok so first off an update... Generally all has been ok... but my anxiety has gone up a little. I will say there has been a lot going on recently as you can tell by my absence from here and I apologize for that. Other than that I have been ok. Did a 6 months check with the doctor and he has recommended me to stay on the meds for another 6 months and I am ok with it!
Part 1 ( JUMP TO PART2 if its too long)
Ok so on to the meat and potatoes. I have recently take up surfing with my wife. She has been surfing for year. I have a been a body boarder for years but never surfed..... (weird right living in hawaii.... never surfed LOL... But I have been in the water my entire life.)
So anyways fast forward 2 months..... I have develop very well and gotten very strong in the water. Well Sunday dusk my wife went out to do a late after noon session. It was BIG.... a little uncomfortable big. Anyways it was so bad I told my wife to go inside, but for what ever reason, she stuck with me. Next thing you know she disappeared. Board was gone and I couldn't find her. I started to worry so I paddled like crazy look for her. Finally I see here bobbing barely above the water. the waves pounding her. I swim over and give her my board to float on so she doesnt drown. Remember though she has been surfing for years...so its not inexperience it was just huge!
So I tow her in to shore as we look for her board (Her leash snapped and broke) I am exhausted looking for board and towing here in. Finally we find it and all is good. Pretty much played lifeguard it was unreal. So you can imagine my anxiety and panic at that moment. But I dealt with it due to being focused on saving her. It was an amazing feeling.
PART 2
OK So no fast forward to yesterday. So the swell is still in and its still big. Anyways my wife said no dice she wanted to just swim. I wanted to surf. So I go out by myself this time. So I paddle out and its big but I am fine. I catch a couple small waves and then a Monster comes in. 10ft faces mind you....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EHk23Rd1e0g - Give you an Idea
OK any ways I catch this awesome wave... I ride the snot out of it having a blast. Now to get off the wave you just usually just ditch the board and jump off, so I do. All of a sudden. My leg feels light...... My board is gone..... Now I am floating in the middle of the ocean no one is around and my board is floating away. Panic sets in.... and I am talking full blown panic attack. You know the hard to breath, cold tingling feeling. I mean full blown!!!!! I am treading water already having a hard time breathing due to the waves and now I am struggling to breath with the panic attack. In my mind I am think about screaming for help but no one is close enough to help. I am !@#$%.......
What do I do?..... well first things first fight or flight kicks on so I need to survive first. I flip over on my back and float for a moment, next I tell myself to breath and I have done this before so dont worry just focus on floating and breathing to get my heart rate back down. Slowly but surely I calm my self down somehow. Secondly I am telling myself. I have done this before.... no big deal I can do this. I saved my wife yesterday, its my turn to safe me.
I regain myself and start swimming in to look for my board. Now remember with a panic attack adrenaline is maxed out right.... I swam so fast and so hard I swam past my board not even realizing it. Until another surfer was coming in and yelled "Eh your board is back there" LOL So I was like WHAT!!! Anyways I swam to the board and my panic and anxiety lifted as I had a board to float on.
Now this was the turning point. After all this... what do you do? Go back in right, you had a rough nuts moment, your life actually was in danger but I was able to control the situation control myself and made all right. Why take any more chances? NO..... This was a turning point.... I needed to face it head on. So I went back out!!!!!! I went back out into the surf and surfed another 1hour before sundown and came in to meet my wife.
After all this I realized how beautiful and how amazing we humans really are. How we can conquer the most dangerous situations. I laugh now how stupid I have had panic attacks on land in the safety of my home..... Now those are nothing. I had a panic attack in the open ocean under huge swell conditions and I survived and even went back out..... PEOPLE YOU CAN DO IT!!! I KNOW YOU CAN!!! BELIEVE AND FOCUS ON WHAT WE HAVE PRACTICED. YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
This was yesterday after all that mess....to remind me how beautiful it can be......
1458