Just General Anxiety Concerns I suppose

[Lexu]

Hello,

This isn't my first time on a forum but this is the first time I have been on a forum for any kind of problem I have. Normally they are about video games or writing or art or something. Lol. Anyway, I believe I have been suffering from anxiety since I was a young teenage though I have never been to a doctor and diagnosed with it. Depression and anxiety run in my family and I was ofter bullied both at school and at home. I never really had a name for the tight feeling in my chest and hysterical mood swings until my mother was diagnosed with anxiety and depression two years ago.

The thing is that I always feel ashamed or weak if I even think about talking about my anxiety let alone going to a doctor for it. It seemed like the motto for my family while I was growing up was Out of Sight out of Mind. My parents chose to ignore any emotional problems that were bubbling up on my surface and just writing them off to hormone and puberty throughout my middle school and high school years. Many times I was told to suck it up or quit being a drama queen. Now I am married and while my husband tries to be supportive, he is at a loss on how to fix anything now so he has fallen back to the trusty old, "Just ignore it" speech. I feel like I am at such a loss at what to do. I am anxious about work, my future, my relationships with EVERYONE, money, and school. I have wanted to quit going to school so many times in hopes that it would just ease the worry that I have.

I also worry that I am just being over dramatic and am really just looking for attention like so many people have told me since I have not bothered going to a doctor to actually get diagnosed with anxiety disorder. I really do not want to go to a doctor though because of costs and I do not want to have a bunch of pills stuffed down my throat.

I guess this post is a bit of a mess. Lol. I just needed to vent I guess.

[Enduronman]

Hey Lexu!

You can't ignore this friend or it could possibly grow into some of the other fears and thoughts that you may have read around here..
A visit with a doctor would be a great place to start, rather then just sweeping it under a rug.
Generally a doctor won't start out with a bunch of pills and more than likely just (1).
It takes years to reach that bunch of pills levels like I have! LOL!
Wishing you the best....

Enduronman :)

[JohnC]

Hi Lexu, The reason i searched out this forum is because i noticed my family was getting tired of listening to my problems with anxiety and depression. Not that they do not love us but i can imagine that it gets old especially if they can not help. I also noticed that I managed to pass my anxiety on to my oldest daughter so i try like hell not to show it to much so my other two won't suffer. Good luck friend, see a doc and never hesitate to ask a question here. Lots of good folks and most of us are long time sufferers.

[Im-Suffering]

Hello,

This isn't my first time on a forum but this is the first time I have been on a forum for any kind of problem I have. Normally they are about video games or writing or art or something. Lol. Anyway, I believe I have been suffering from anxiety since I was a young teenage though I have never been to a doctor and diagnosed with it. Depression and anxiety run in my family and I was ofter bullied both at school and at home. I never really had a name for the tight feeling in my chest and hysterical mood swings until my mother was diagnosed with anxiety and depression two years ago.

The thing is that I always feel ashamed or weak if I even think about talking about my anxiety let alone going to a doctor for it. It seemed like the motto for my family while I was growing up was Out of Sight out of Mind. My parents chose to ignore any emotional problems that were bubbling up on my surface and just writing them off to hormone and puberty throughout my middle school and high school years. Many times I was told to suck it up or quit being a drama queen. Now I am married and while my husband tries to be supportive, he is at a loss on how to fix anything now so he has fallen back to the trusty old, "Just ignore it" speech. I feel like I am at such a loss at what to do. I am anxious about work, my future, my relationships with EVERYONE, money, and school. I have wanted to quit going to school so many times in hopes that it would just ease the worry that I have.

I also worry that I am just being over dramatic and am really just looking for attention like so many people have told me since I have not bothered going to a doctor to actually get diagnosed with anxiety disorder. I really do not want to go to a doctor though because of costs and I do not want to have a bunch of pills stuffed down my throat.

I guess this post is a bit of a mess. Lol. I just needed to vent I guess.

Pay attention to the typographical emphasis in the following message. Your post is not a mess, it is only you that believe you are a mess, and your life reflects that.

Listen to the common trend in each reply you received. That is "see a doctor".

The most important statement you have ever heard in your entire life is about to follow : Seeing a doctor is not so much important for the way you feel, but is highly symbolic that you wish to change, and are taking steps to better yourself, period.

Now this will work twofold:

1) validate your issue, your husband needs this, and so do you.
2) you are more fearful without a diagnosis. Because of doubt.

Plus a diagnosis would be good for you, but you don't do things that are good for you, so we see excuses, the same excuses used in school as a child.

Growing up bullied, you repressed the emotions because you were told to, anything to the contrary you were made to feel weak, shameful, and guilty. You were dismissed, period. And you still feel this way today, reflected in your relationships, money, you could care less about yourself, yet you are worried that others should care when you don't.

For you then, you must learn to validate your feelings, to feel validated.

Start to care about you, and begin with the doctor, when you care, then you will have the support of others. In school, no one understood you, so you gave up. Now others give up on you.

I strongly suggest you follow this advice and understand the message given to you.