Overcoming your anxiety. The guide to living.

[Xerosnake90]

Hello everyone and welcome to the change of your life!

We're all here for a reason and with the same question. How do we beat our anxiety? I'll tell you this, the accumulation of anxiety can happen at any given time. It only takes one event in your life for it to uncontain itself and turn into full blown anxiety. Included with physical symptoms and the many mind games that come with it. While you're here we are going to educate you on anxiety, how it affects us and ultimately how to beat it. There are threads here already entailing diet plans that help with anxiety and I will include links for them here. So how do we get started? It's not by popping a magic pill! Let's get started in beating this thing.

What is my anxiety You're sitting in your bed. You've had these strange feelings all day long. Something is off, strangely so. You carry on your days until something triggers an eruption . Your fingers numb and tingling, your heartbeat races and all of the sudden it HITS you. This extreme surge throughout your body that sends chills all over your body. All of the sudden your mind runs off asking "what the hell just happened?". You're in a skirmish, frantically punching in the letters on your keyboard asking google what is happening to you. Big mistake you come to realize. Your searches send back information that you're having a heart attack. At this point you feel nausea and are scared for your life. "I'm having a heart attack!" You're convinced. But somehow you get past it, you don't collapse and either away. Instead you carry this constant worry, why did this happen to me? You spend days, weeks, maybe months or years wondering why. You have symptoms that are explained only by the worst ideas. Cancer, heart problems, degenerative disease. The list goes on, and the more you worry about it the more you sink into your seat. There absolutely must be something wrong with you as you are convinced. It's just so strange that you never realized these symptoms seem to be there only when you notice them.

Thoughts escape you . Reality becomes a chore and you just keep trying to live a normal life under these new rules. Sure enough they overwhelm you, resulting in more pains, sometimes severe and terrifying. Why do your muscles twitch, your eye twitches and it's getting worse. It never lasted this long before. This cycle goes on and on indefinitely. You feel like you'll never feel normal again until your google search stumbles you upon your saving grace. Understanding. You come across an anxiety page and you relate to all the things being said. This can't possibly be anxiety can it? All these things I feel are real and not something you just imagined up! It can't be!

So here we are with this absolute life changing mindset and we can't believe how we feel. This thought is devastating and rules my world, how could this be self induced? And so we enter the world of anxiety. Let me start this by saying these feelings and thoughts are absolutely "self induced". Us humans have endured years of evolution, ranging from primitive beings to ideas of learning to intelligent humans of vast knowledge. Ideas that passes on through decades until we became the prime beings that we are today. Thinking of the ultimate, the mind is a powerful device that creates out entire existence. If not for out perception of the world would there be a purpose behind it? You set your own path and train of thought. If we believe the people of this world are here to enjoy all life and to love, we will love. If we are cowered away and avoid the demons of existence we will cower away from that evil. Ultimately our ideas shape our existence and that is something that believe it or not is shaped by one simple thing. What we think about! So you're thinking "no, you're telling me my thinking creates all of these physical pains and terrible fatigues, stomach problems. Etc?" Short answer. Yes. Once again, your mind is your existence and when you think that you're in pain constantly, and that you will not get any better. That IS your existence at that point. You see? It's all you focus on. You're not thinking about how you're becoming a better person at your job by absolutely exceeding your limits. You're only stuck on feeling feeling bad. And there you go. So we've come to determine that what we focus on can shape our lives and how we live. Are you still confused? Don't be, this information will make more sense when we go over how our anxiety works.

How it all works So we've determined that what we think about shapes out anxiety. Let's get into that a bit further. Thoughts and emotions are connected. When we are elated we tend to have positive ideas. "I feel great! I want to do this right now it'll be so fun!". So you go about your fun activities with that mind set. Let's flip that around and see your mindset when upset! "This sucks, I don't want to do this right now". You focus on negative ideas that you reinforce with negative statements. So how does this work with anxiety? Fear. Through some form of event your fears manifested and with fear comes worry. You worry about things in life normally, are you doing well at work? Will my bills be paid on time? Etc. So how does this turn into the anxiety we know? Easy , you're constantly worrying. Think about this, you need to sleep every day for a set amount of time. This is your reboot period when your brain and body does the most important thing it can, heal. Your mind heals, your body heals. When we don't sleep the mind deteriorates. Energy levels drop, can't focus, the list keeps going. Now think of that in terms of anxiety. Your brain is constantly in a state of worry. Concious thoughts focus on fear. You worry of your health, your job or relationship. This keeps going until you externally begin to do things to avoid said thoughts. Avoidance through avoidance. You stop seeing your friends or quit with your workout regime. You don't make eye contact or reach out for conversation when out and about etc. eventually this train of thought becomes the norm for you. Your brain adapts to your new way of thinking and your body gets used to staying in a state of worry and fear. At this point physical symptoms are present and powerful. Extreme fatigue, nausea, tingling or numbness, migraine headaches, eye twitching. And of course everyone's favorite, panic attacks. You must understand that your brain gets little to no time to stop worrying. As if you were awake for days on end it gets no rest time. And thus irritability and the like also presents itself.

Anxiety affects people in many ways alike. But how come some people react differently? So once again, we go back to how we let our thoughts rule our existence. If someone has been living life with the mindset they are a happy person despite troubles, you'll find them to stay relatively positive and hopeful they can beat this thing. Someone who grew up to be angry will accept that and just lash out against others. It's all about what we desire for ourselves and that's important in overcoming anxiety which we are just about ready to do.

Another way to understand your anxiety is to understand how it works on a primal instinct. We all have a fight or flight instinct. The same part of the brain that initiates hiccups and yawns are responsible for your fight or flight reaction. Ever wonder why you yawn or get random hiccups as an anxiety symptom? Makes sense now doesn't it? Fight or flight initiates with the same surge that happens through a panic attack. Adrenaline. We rarely experience a fight or flight scenario due to our lives remaining relatively safe at all times. We no longer have need to be out in the wild hunting for our food, we no longer need to react to a wild animal threatening our lives. If such a scenario were to happen your fight or flight would react and you'd feel that exact thing you feel during a panic attack. So why are panic attacks so scary? Because you're not facing any danger. You're going about your business and this fight or flight situation hits you. This feeling is designed for when you are threatened. And since you aren't facing any actual danger the intense feeling usually comes with rampant thoughts of "why am I feeling this and something must be wrong". If you were in real danger you'd know that and wouldn't have time to wonder why you're feeling this way. You'd be fighting to survive! We will get back to this later when we learn to accept the panic attack feeling.

Now I advise everyone follow and read the two threads in about to post so you can get an even deeper understanding of anxiety, and your diet for beating anxiety. Foods have a huge effect on our chemistry and can effect you. So right now, read these two!!

Eating regime: http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?14507-The-Definitive-Supplement-Regimen-to-Help-Cure-Your-Anxiety

Understanding your fears: http://anxietyforum.net/forum/showthread.php?29354-Understanding-your-fears-The-origins-of-your-anxiety

[Xerosnake90]

Welcome back! So now that you understand how fear works and a nice diet to follow, let's go ahead and start following some routines that slowly but surely will fix your anxiety. The best way to beat anxiety is to understand as much about it as you can, so here are some more important points to remember while recovering. Not only must you remember these but live them.

Beliefs, and how they affect you: The things in life that we do or don't like. Types of people you like to be around, foods you like to taste. These are all based on your beliefs. Ever believed something along the lines of "I can't do that, it's too much!" And when you went to do it you found it came easy to you. But you believed that you couldn't, sow how did you? Simple, beliefs are just thought. Integrated ideas that we follow as ideals that can be broken if we choose to or even if we didn't know we could. Why is this so important with anxiety? Simple, you BELIEVE you're sick. You believe that you have an illness, or your pains must indicate something is wrong with you. You go to a doctor and they give you a clean slate of health. So why aren't you surprised!? What you were told went against your beliefs. Thus you choose to ignore that idea. And by further believing you are ill you will continue to be ill. You must believe you are healthy. And by adopting this mindset through the course of mind adjustment you will continue to feel that way.

Welcome your anxiety and panic attacks: Ok, so here you are reading and I just told you to welcome the thing you're afraid of. You probably think im a bit crazy but try to understand. The reason you have these feelings is because of fear in the first place. If you welcome the anxiety, panic attacks and believe that truly it is just anxiety. You will lose your fear of anxiety. And ultimately anxiety will go with it. So you think "hello tingling fingers, hello anxiety" and at that point you move on from it. If you don't fear the symptoms and welcome them instead they are no longer fears and ideas that aren't wanted because you've accepted them.

The 30 day rule: Your brain takes time to adjust to new ideas and teachings. If we learnt something new just by practicing and hearing it once we'd all be super genius levels of human with amazing talent. Or the worst of the worst of nothing but negative ideas are learnt. So here is the 30 day rule. Days 1-10 are the resistance period. You will instinctually attempt to resist new ideas and practices because it is not what you are used to. You try a new gym routine and are excited the first week, the next not so much? There you go... Days 10-20 is your adjustment period. Your mind isn't so much fighting as it's just indifferent to them. You continue on with your ideas on a concious level. Days 20 - 30 is the integration period. Your mind is now seeing your thoughts as an integral idea and begins to turn them into a permanent thoughts. At this point you should begin to default into those thoughts and routines you integrated as they now are the normal "you". To learn something new you must understand that you must believe in those ideas. And don't get stuck on "it's been 30 days it's still not integrated". If that's a thought you're having then you fighting the idea. Believe in it passively and keep moving on. It could take longer than 30 days who knows. Stick with it.

Feeling your emotions This idea is paramount in the improval of your anxiety. You absolutely have to stop trying to dictate and understand your emotions. Just allow yourself to feel them. If you're upset don't excuse why you are. You wouldn't do it when you're happy and having a good time so why when you're upset? Just allow yourself to feel the way you do. This next point is huge, as much as anything else on the way to recovery.

You will have setbacks: So you are feeling good, going along with your day and the next thing you know you're right back in it. You worry about symptoms, irritable and tired, etc. these are setbacks. These will happen as your brain reorganizes its thought structure. Your mind needs time to adapt, and it's only natural for old thoughts that are subconsciously rooted to come back. The battle of the setback is to not let it through you right back into despair. You let it pass, your emotions will be there regardless but you do NOT attempt to avoid them. Remember. You simply allow yourself to feel them.

Live in the present: Ever notice how you're always thinking about things that have happened already or hasn't yet? You could be associating these thoughts with happy, sad, angry emotions, who knows! The point is you need to live in the present and only let your current world affect you. The past doesn't exist, neither does the future. The only thing that exists right now is you and what's going on. Not your bad relationship from the past, not the worry that you'll never get better. Feel your emotions and live in the present based on what's happening around you in your life.

Positive thinking: I could start every one of these statements off with how important it is for you to do these. Just goes to show the significance of what we are doing. This is the biggest trap people fall into with anxiety and it absolutely hinders progress. Your thinking is just negative. Whether it was before your anxiety or developed as it rose up. Every thought is a downgrading idea. It's all just down down down. You cannot, and I repeat you just cannot keep thinking negatively. I can't do this. I don't have fun. I want to go home. Just STOP IT. Your thinking got you here in the first place and every negative thought you focus on stays with you longer. Instead of occupying yourself with negative, you start integrating positive thoughts. Now how do I start doing this when I'm so deep in...?

Appreciate the small things: this is the easiest fool proof way to start your mind changing journey. You appreciate the small things. You love nature? Stand in the breeze and absorb the soothing sounds. Animals your favorite, get to your pet and enjoy their company. Savor your breakfast, appreciate the nuances in flavor. Watching your favorite YouTube series? Appreciate the small things. When you can focus on that, you take your mind off of negative ideas and can learn to focus on positive thoughts.

The 6 human needs: We all have needs, wants and desires. Our wants are a current state of mind that's based off of our desires. I desire I've cream and I want green tea flavor. The two work hand in hand and are very much interchangeable. Needs however are different. We have a set path of things that we need in our lives for us to feel well. Certainty Why would you chose to watch a movie you've seen before over a list of movies you haven't seen? Because you're certain it'll be good. We need to be sure of things. OCD stems from a deficiency of certainty in your life. People perform mundane tasks to feel certain of the even they're performing. Variety on the other hand we need a certain level of uncertainty in our lives. If you knew what'll happen at all times you would get bored. People in relationships begin arguing for variety when they quit going out. We watch sports and gamble for variety. Significance We need to feel significant. You have a voice amongst a group of friends, or people come to you for help. That lets you feel significant. love and connection relationships, intimacy and people you can relate to. Someone who understands you. Growth You must grow as a person to avoid feeling stuck. Learning new things, trying new things. Promotions at work or a better job over all. Get bigger and stronger at the gym. All this helps you grow. Contribution And finally, we need to contribute to those that give to us. Much in play like significance. You must do your best to meet these needs on a daily basis in order to achieve quick recovery. If constant you will rise much quicker than if you were to take care of all needs spread out. Do what you need to satisfy everything whichever way you desire.

Anxiety medications and why they don't fix anything: Medication plays a big part in today's society. Have a headache? Take medicine! Have a cold? Here you go! The problem with medicine and the field in general is it focuses on fixing an issue after it has occurred. It does not variable in prevention. So you're given medication for anxiety and now you feel better with the possibility of some side effects. Who knows what it is exactly that you're putting into your body. You just know you feel better, maybe it's the only thing that makes you feel better. You go on and then you say "I feel great. I don't need these anymore". So you come off the medication, you're ok a couple of days and then the chemical leaves your body. You start feeling uneasy, worries come back and your symptoms arise once more until you're sucked right back down into the void you were once in. So what happened? One of my favorite examples is this. You break a bone in your arm, go to the doctor and are informed of that. "Well ok doc, give me whatever helps with the pain" and you're given painkillers. You take the painkillers and sure the pain won't be there, or be as bad. But you didn't do anything to take care of that broken bone did you? See, your broken bone is the anxiety and the painkillers are your medication. They simply don't fix anything, they cover it up. Once you're off the meds and the symptoms come back I can almost guarantee you'll freak out more than ever because you felt better only to have it all come crashing down again. Thus making your anxiety worse. Medication fixes NOTHING

[Xerosnake90]

Distracting ourselves from our own minds We've learned so far that anxiety is caused by our thought patterns and letting them take hold. Too many times do I see people be content with just sitting around in their negative thought. You stop seeing your friends, don't go out to the movies or bowling what have you. Stop going to the gym, speak with no one at work. What's the thought process behind this? "I'm miserable leave me alone to my thoughts". How is this productive!? You're not anxious because you're alone. You're alone because you're anxious. Go out and distract yourself! How will you re direct your thought process to positive if you're not in the scenario to do so?

Ok, so we've gone over quite a bit of information and we are going to learn how to apply it. I advise everyone attempting to break free to understand that it doesn't happen overnight. And if you're ready to give up before you begin you will go NO WHERE. If that's your thought process then you only believe in being miserable. You need to believe in getting better, instead.

This programn will be taken in steps. You cannot move on to the next steps until you're committed to the previous steps. Most importantly, you do not move on from one step by not doing it anymore. You keep each previous step as part of your life and only move forward with that idea integrated. Are we ready to go on? Here we go!

Step 1: love yourself

Take a moment to understand how you view yourself. Constantly worry that something you do isn't good enough? Think no one likes you? Or you retreat when someone seems to give that off? Well no longer. Do yourself a favor and start to 'love yourself'. Understand people may be rude to you because they're irritated. Perhaps they don't like you because they themselves are just an angry person. As a matter of fact, what does it matter if they like you or not! Especially strangers, they don't know you, what does it matter? Be yourself, the person you want to be and don't shy away from showing a crazy side to you. There are people much like those who seem to dislike you, but whom love that you can be yourself. And look at that. Now you're focusing on love, positive emotions. You must love yourself in order to love others and to receive love. We love by appreciating the small things, and by doing the things we love associated with our 6 human needs.

Step 2: Do what you love
With understanding of the six human needs comes the need to realize what you enjoy doing on a daily basis that fulfills those needs. If your variety consists of speaking to random people then go into chat rooms. Go to a social area with things in common to what you do and Conversate. Play an online multiplayer game. Take care of your need to contribute by blogging, donate to charity or just help someone randomly. I bet you're thinking this sounds silly. What's the point? The point is I've only just informed you of why you do the things you do on a normal basis. And how those things actually cause you to live a normal and fulfilling life. Hiding in your room waiting for these feelings to go away won't happen if you don't do something to bring yourself outside your negative state of a comfort zone. Sure it can seem tough to want to go out at times or take care of business. The worst that can happen is you'll actually enjoy yourself. So your goal here is to make a plan of activities that you can perform daily and weekly and stick to doing those things. Remember there are six needs and you can fulfill more than 1 at a time. Just don't miss one, having all 5 but lacking the other completely is not going to fix your problems. Go back up and read what the six needs are until you have it figured out. Then work on that plan and begin doing it. No "I'll do it in two weeks when I'm more ready" or "I don't have the time now". No excuses. That's how you ended up where you are in the first place. Take charge and make it happen!

Step 3: Becoming a better you: So you've found a new appreciation for things and are going about your everyday business. How long have you been at it? I bet it was difficult at first, but you powered through and are making your way into habitual territory where the things you now do become second nature. So you're moving forward and now it's time to become a better you. At this point your way of thinking should be easing up and you will now focus on thinking the way you want to think. You must view yourself the way you want to become. Your actions must dictate this reflection. Belief here and now is stronger and more necessary than ever. You're projecting an image of you and if you don't believe it to be achievable then what sort of progress could you possibly make? You'll put to practice these ideas you have of yourself, even if never done before. Do you see yourself having interesting stories to tell people? You believe, and follow that idea until your stories reflect that thought. Want to be stronger and bigger in the gym? View your prime physique, feel yourself grow with every rep. Put in the effort in this aspect and you will enjoy the rewards over due time. Still sticking to it? You're almost done.

Step 4: Live You've committed to the previous steps. You're committed to the ideas I've brought forth and you're doing the tasks that I've asked of you. Now you're doing what is most important. Living. No fears of this and that, no worries over things we have little control over. It's because you're now controlling the only thing that matters and it's your life and how you go about enjoying it. Re read each idea I've written in regards to understanding anxiety. Understanding your needs and the such. Keep them in mind. You may continue to have symptoms. But much like the other symptoms that seem to have faded away, so will the rest each day you move towards living the life you want. Until a distant memory of how you used to feel remains.

Now I know many people wanted an answer to immediate relief. How can I beat this now? There is no immediate relief, much like there are no immediate goals in life. You will never become a record selling singer by going onstage for the first time to a sold out show. You'll never be a bodybuilding champion without putting hundreds and thousands of hours into the gym. Never will you become a doctor by walking into a hospital and applying. You put work into your life to grow as a person until you moved forward enough to take that next step. Staircases aren't climbed by keeping your feet flat on the floor. You rise above yourself and reap the rewards of such action. You do the things I've spoken about here and you will move on from your anxiety. Do you need proof? It won't matter until you see it for yourself. I've followed these guidelines after becoming desperately Ill and fearful from anxiety. I was sure of dying, afraid every moment of the worst happening. I became shut in and hated most every moment of my day. Now I'm back to enjoying my life and moving forward at all times. Is my anxiety cured? No, I still have things to achieve. Do I have panic attacks, do I fear the things happening to my body and loathe each day as it is? No. I enjoy my life, I enjoy what I do and the people I do it with. That's living life, as you will do too.

Share your journey with us. The progress you make each day will amaze you.

[Joe.]

Amazing thread! You and I'm suffering are the 'experts' as such. A thread I will come back to many times.

This should be a sticky!!!

[Xerosnake90]

Really appreciate that Joe :) hoping this can help many that find it.