How to Deal with Anxiety at Work?

[Blue122]

I suppose it's not full blown anxiety, as I never suffer from panic attacks, but I always get extremely anxious and nervous whenever I'm around my boss or supervisor at work.

I don't know why, but I think it's a combination of wanting to impress them and feeling scrutinized by them(especially when it seems like they are watching me really closely or intently). This anxiety I get around them always causes me to make the most stupid mistakes or forget basic things that I would never forget if it was just me working alone or with other coworkers, so therefore I look completely incompetent in front of my superiors. My coworkers have always regarded me as very skilled at what I do, but my boss doesn't seem to think that way about me likely because I've never been able to prove it to her because I turn into a nervous, bumbling idiot whenever she's around!

Outside of work, or even at work when my boss/supervisors aren't around, I am normally a pretty confident person, but when it comes to my boss, I just can't seem to shake this issue. Whenever it happens, I always tell myself that it won't happen again and next time I won't get nervous, but it never really works. I really want to impress my superiors, especially the big boss, but I feel like I'll never be able to do that or gain their trust with this anxiety issue I get around them.

I realize that this is a common problem for people in the workplace, so I was hoping to get some advice on how to overcome or deal with this issue.

[JLK]

My anxiety at work has more to do with my fears of being in public places and stuff like that, but I've found it does help to say things to myself like "It doesn't matter what they think." For you, maybe try saying to yourself exactly what you've written. When you feel the anxiety coming on say to yourself, "I'm very skilled at what I do." Say "I am intelligent and I can handle this." What ever works for you!!! You have the confidence inside yourself!!

[Prayer for Anxiety]

Hey Blue,

Maybe a lot of the expectations you imagine aren't really there. Don't put anyone on a pedestal, not you and not your boss. Mutual respect is healthier.

Like you said, you are competent. Find strength there.

Also, your boss might have issues (you didn't say much about this) that affect you. Some bosses are very difficult to deal with. Try to distance yourself and be objective.

Your expectations might actually be higher than hers. Remember, bosses are human, just like you.

Many blessings,
Vince