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View Full Version : Feeling significantly better. My top 10 list of what helped.



Ankhsious
07-02-2014, 11:18 AM
1. Changed my relationship with anger. I always "looked down" on anger as being wrong. Anger is a good tool to turn apathy/depression/shame/guilt into action (something as simple as deciding to exercise). Does it mean I flip out? No. It just means I face people, particularly difficult people with a sword on my waist and visible.

2. Less trying to 'figure it out'. Realized that setting intention is all that is required of me and that the universe will deliver the rest if I am open to it. Open means open heart. All of the best things that ever happened to me happened this way, not through obsessive control. Listening to a LOT of Abraham Hicks helping to drive this point home. Particularly the part about being less specific.

3. Emotional processing is enlightenment. I have been shoving down emotions my whole life (something I learned as a child). I used my intellect as my sword but I have created a hollow oasis. Whether I work a stressful job or go teach at an orphanage in Africa, there will be people trying to push me around, people with their own issues. SOMETHING WILL ALWAYS GO WRONG. Learning to feel the emotional reaction and then let it dissipate is all that is required.

4. Morning meditation. I wake up with borderline panic every morning. I still do. I have committed myself to switching breathing to "manual mode" and then slowly counting breaths down from 99 to 0 instead of reaching for Ativan. Thus far it has ALWAYS worked. Not made me feel great but at least I am able to downgrade from panic to low grade anxiousness.

5. Protect my inner circle. I have an inner circle. I will not allow any person to push their way into it, I have my sword ready. I sometimes visualize myself slicing people up who try to come into this circle. This circle is my right to my emotions. The biggest intruder into circle is Mr. SHOULD. Mr. Should is my own thoughts that arise from my biases, hangups, positionalities about the way things SHOULD be or the way people SHOULD or SHOULDN'T behave. Well guess what, people and situations suck wind often so screw it. I visualize myself protecting my circle from thoughts of "SHOULD".

6. Improve your handicap one stroke at a time (golf analogy). If you don't have a 200 yard shot over water in your bag, don't try it, lay up. What this means is accept where you are on your journey. If that means letting yourself get carried away with a positive thought or anticipation of a vacation, IT'S OKAY! Yes Mr. Buddhist Monk doesn't need to do this but I do.

7. Emotions release as a stack. You don't need to go over every childhood experience that made you angry. If you allow yourself to release anger in the context of any ONE experience, it releases the entire stack and feels really good. If you're passive/nice guy like me I encourage you to search deep within and find reasons "you could have been angry if you weren't such an understanding person"
Happy to explain any of these in more detail. But it's really helping!