joeyyy
07-01-2014, 05:45 AM
Hey guys and gals, I came to this forum to tell you that youre all some of the most strong human beings I have ever not met.
I started the anxiety when my relationship started going south, and a bout with drugs. I was blaming the drugs, and not the manipulative tendencies of the partner.
Though the drugs may have helped, it is regardless to the fact that my relationship was 100% sour. I would stand there, 1am, trying to focus on my breathing, listening to my heart, feeling that tell-tale "energy" in my chest and neck, when I lost feeling in my limbs and eventually passed out. from being anxious.
And then theres that tell-tale common anxiety blaming, like you just need to blame it on a physical issue. at the time I had a swollen lymph node in my groin. ( oh my gosh, STDs, cancer, impending doom! ) yeah, all through my head. wasnt helping. The only thing that could ease that strange torturous 'energetic' feeling that came with the anxiety was alcohol. lots of it. This is where I hit rock bottom.
I would wake up next to her, with a heart beating so fast that my breath couldnt catch up. and that energy feeling! the worst. I wished it upon no man.
I would go to work and fight it so badly, like it was some bad trip. which got me through the day, but in a very painful way. and sleeping would not come easily.
finally got with my doctor and tried benzos, which helped, but I was not quite the 'pill' guy. I finally had enough of the anxiety after a long day of work, when ended in me making a dart for the hospital.
Something told me to just make a pit-stop at my mothers house. and I did. and I came in, with that powerful energy/fear/hopeless feeling. when she helped me talk through it like a pro, and proceeded to tell me that she had anxiety in her 30s with my father. its hereditary to find the weak and wish to help them, ending up falling to their level. and there was my turning point.
So here I am. almost 8am in the morning, ready to tell her were through. I now 100% know thats where the anxiety is coming from. and I would like to end it on good terms, even though she may backbite the situation.
I just wanted to say, that even though my time with serious anxiety (about 2 months) may have been relatively short lived, or long, depends on your situation...
That you are all, the most, powerful people I have ever met. I am absolutely amazed with every single one of you. I just want to give you all a huge hug.
The anxiety is slipping away now. and my head is just that much clearer. I just want to remind you all, that you need to find that 'root'. and destroy it. when there is no room for 'you', you become nothing.
love ya guys.
I started the anxiety when my relationship started going south, and a bout with drugs. I was blaming the drugs, and not the manipulative tendencies of the partner.
Though the drugs may have helped, it is regardless to the fact that my relationship was 100% sour. I would stand there, 1am, trying to focus on my breathing, listening to my heart, feeling that tell-tale "energy" in my chest and neck, when I lost feeling in my limbs and eventually passed out. from being anxious.
And then theres that tell-tale common anxiety blaming, like you just need to blame it on a physical issue. at the time I had a swollen lymph node in my groin. ( oh my gosh, STDs, cancer, impending doom! ) yeah, all through my head. wasnt helping. The only thing that could ease that strange torturous 'energetic' feeling that came with the anxiety was alcohol. lots of it. This is where I hit rock bottom.
I would wake up next to her, with a heart beating so fast that my breath couldnt catch up. and that energy feeling! the worst. I wished it upon no man.
I would go to work and fight it so badly, like it was some bad trip. which got me through the day, but in a very painful way. and sleeping would not come easily.
finally got with my doctor and tried benzos, which helped, but I was not quite the 'pill' guy. I finally had enough of the anxiety after a long day of work, when ended in me making a dart for the hospital.
Something told me to just make a pit-stop at my mothers house. and I did. and I came in, with that powerful energy/fear/hopeless feeling. when she helped me talk through it like a pro, and proceeded to tell me that she had anxiety in her 30s with my father. its hereditary to find the weak and wish to help them, ending up falling to their level. and there was my turning point.
So here I am. almost 8am in the morning, ready to tell her were through. I now 100% know thats where the anxiety is coming from. and I would like to end it on good terms, even though she may backbite the situation.
I just wanted to say, that even though my time with serious anxiety (about 2 months) may have been relatively short lived, or long, depends on your situation...
That you are all, the most, powerful people I have ever met. I am absolutely amazed with every single one of you. I just want to give you all a huge hug.
The anxiety is slipping away now. and my head is just that much clearer. I just want to remind you all, that you need to find that 'root'. and destroy it. when there is no room for 'you', you become nothing.
love ya guys.