Cancelling Appointments

[Kellie]

How many of you cancel appointments constantly, like counseling/psychology appointments because you are too anxious? I do it when I can't get up in the morning which is quite often. I feel really guilty. :/

[NervousNiki]

At least you call to cancel. I have a terrible habit of just not going. :/ I did it today...for an appointment I made this morning.

[Kellie]

Thats only on my good days, alot of the time I just don't turn up too.. It sucks eh. And I email too..

[superchick22684]

One of the first things that I did yesterday morning was to cancel my counseling appointment for today. The fact that my counselor/therapist wasn't there and all I had to do was leave a message made it easier. I've only been back in therapy for maybe a month but I frequently want to cancel/not show up. However, the place I go has a policy that they charge you whether you show up or are a no show so that does discourage me a bit.
Sometimes I just don't want to go, which is why I cancelled my appointment for today. I'm not feeling particularly guilty about it right now but I'm sure that when she calls back to reschedule the guilt will hit me. :/

[Kellie]

I cancel everything, even hanging with friends. I feel so guilty yet that doesn't stop me.
My psychologist is free so i do it all the time.
Its nice to know I am not the only one.

[Anne1221]

Is that your anxiety or something else? I never cancel anything because I feel it's not fair. I used to have a friend cancel lunch on me all the time and I didn't like it, so I don't do it to others. But I never feel anxious about going to these places so maybe that's why I don't cancel. If you feel anxious and cancel, that's a different story, but if you just don't feel like going, that's not a good habit to get into, in my opinion.

[superchick22684]

Is that your anxiety or something else? I never cancel anything because I feel it's not fair. I used to have a friend cancel lunch on me all the time and I didn't like it, so I don't do it to others. But I never feel anxious about going to these places so maybe that's why I don't cancel. If you feel anxious and cancel, that's a different story, but if you just don't feel like going, that's not a good habit to get into, in my opinion.

I know when I replied that I made it sound like I just "don't feel like going" what I really meant was feeling anxious/depressed. I'm sorry that I didn't elaborate on that more. My counseling appointments are starting to become a challenge for me because I'm constantly fighting off the anxiety of having to go to them. When I first started going it didn't seem that bad but the farther I get into therapy I can feel it getting worse. Out of the last four appointment that I've had I have either felt a) physically ill starting about 30 minutes before I have to be there or b) had a panic attack on the way to or in the waiting room of the counseling office.
I have no issues with my therapist/counselor at all, we discuss things and I've noticed progress but I have the worst anxiety when I know that I have an appointment.

[Kellie]

I know when I replied that I made it sound like I just "don't feel like going" what I really meant was feeling anxious/depressed. I'm sorry that I didn't elaborate on that more. My counseling appointments are starting to become a challenge for me because I'm constantly fighting off the anxiety of having to go to them. When I first started going it didn't seem that bad but the farther I get into therapy I can feel it getting worse. Out of the last four appointment that I've had I have either felt a) physically ill starting about 30 minutes before I have to be there or b) had a panic attack on the way to or in the waiting room of the counseling office.
I have no issues with my therapist/counselor at all, we discuss things and I've noticed progress but I have the worst anxiety when I know that I have an appointment.

I am in the exactly same position! I completely understand that!

[Anne1221]

Oh, I see. Well, I think that would make it hard. It seems strange,but maybe talk it over with the therapist about how you get anxious before going and see if they have any suggestions. Sometimes when I have something hard to do, I promise myself something good after it's over. Then I focus on that. "When this is over, I'm going to treat myself to _____". I keep thinking of that good/fun thing I promised myself until it's over and it's time for that treat.

[superchick22684]

Anne 1221,
I know it seems strange however nothing anxiety related for me has ever been "normal." My therapist already knows that I've had panic attacks in the waiting room of her office and felt terrible about the fact that it was happening. I like the idea of using a positive incentive to get through difficult situations, I'm planning on trying that in the future. Thanks!

Kellie,
It's kind of nice knowing that I'm not alone in feeling that way. This is actually the second time that I'm going through therapy, the first time was right after I was diagnosed in '05. I wish there was some way to get rid of some of these irrational fears. They make simple things so much harder to accomplish.

[Pumpkin]

Totally normal. A few months ago I had an appointment with a psychologist and they required that my mom came to my first appointment with me (even though i'm 18 and technically my own guardian) and I said okay and scheduled it in hopes to eventually bring up my anxiety to my mom and let her know what was going on. I ended up cancelling the appointment right before though because I was too shy and didn't want to talk to my mom about everything going on, have her worry and make things awkward. Hopefully you can eventually be strong enough to push yourself to attend your next appointment and be able to look forward to all the help that you'll receive from going.

[Kellie]

I know that it is in my best interest to go, but I can't even get out of bed and face my family let alone my teacher or my psychologist.. I just want it all to end. If you know what I mean. I am glad though that I am not alone

[Pumpkin]

I know that it is in my best interest to go, but I can't even get out of bed and face my family let alone my teacher or my psychologist.. I just want it all to end. If you know what I mean. I am glad though that I am not alone

I've had that feeling of wanting it to end many times. It's a scary feeling but getting help is so worth it. Sounds cheesy but there is so much to live for in life and you're throwing away so much peace and happiness every time you cancel an appointment. I really hope you can bring yourself to going Kellie :) be strong!!

[Bhargav Sanketi]

Hi

I know it is really hard to not feel anxious when it comes to an appointment. So instead of that I started using online counselling websites. MUCH BETTER.

You can try stuff like healtheminds. They are really good.

[Im-Suffering]

I know that it is in my best interest to go, but I can't even get out of bed and face my family let alone my teacher or my psychologist.. I just want it all to end. If you know what I mean. I am glad though that I am not alone

People on this forum must tread lightly with you. Listen carefully. You are what you think, period. Continuous thought will produce results, whether constructive or destructive to your mind and/or body. Thoughts of harm, death self worth, are NOT inherent in your creaturehood, rather, not natural to your psyche. So you will rebel against them for a short period as you do here, and your body will feel it. Your body goes with the flow of life, and does not understand, wanting to die, for it knows it never dies, every cell in your body cooporates in a life affirming venture, together, even at the behest of your thoughts.. You however do not understand that, nor is your thinking clear. And you feel the results of anti-life thinking.

Now, there is much more to your story, as you have lived a pain-filled 17 years. You are the victim of abuse, and you are isolated. You have a fear of your peers as a result, confused, alone, and powerless.

Sternly now, it is theses powerless feelings that you must work on, period.

You need a change of environs, as a physical change will be recouparative and theraputic, you need to use your resources mentally to earn money from where you sit ! Ebay, craigslist, locally for example. Immediately to start moving in ways and thinking in ways to self empower, do you understand?

Now the neglect and abuse needs to be addressed, so instead of self hate, you will learn to express, by empowering you will learn to speak about things you hide, you feel may be taboo, you see. However this is your start for growth and to be able to accept and understand these feelings, and ultimately, release them and move on.

Self empower means you begin to act and speak in ways that feel good to you, to take some charge and approach with determination to get what you seek.

In your talks with your therapist, and with yourself :

"This has happened to me, i need to go deeper and discover more about what im hiding, you are not to tell me what is acceptable to discuss, or i will find someone who will! I am going to heal, i am going to express myself, i am going to live my life as empowered and nothing will stand in my way !

Finally, do not wonder who I am or whether i am credible, or even if you understand my words, read what you will, let your psyche absorb the life-giving, self empowering, constructive, loving nature of these posts. Eat, sleep, breathe the potential that you have for happiness.

Remove yourself and be stubbornly unwilling to accept anything not in your best interest. Remove yourself from the people who strip you of your personal power, you can feel it ! Do not accept it !! Listen !

Suicides have no way out because their terms cannot be met. There is rigid inflexible thought patterns. They simply cannot have the life they want, and at the same time they are powerless because they have been stripped of it (expression) in all manner of trauma.

Work tirelessly in both thought and action, and speech, to empower yourself, by acting solely and selfishly in your best interests.

That is all I have for now. Print out this post an reread it. Bring it to your therapist.

[Kellie]

People on this forum must tread lightly with you. Listen carefully. You are what you think, period. Continuous thought will produce results, whether constructive or destructive to your mind and/or body. Thoughts of harm, death self worth, are NOT inherent in your creaturehood, rather, not natural to your psyche. So you will rebel against them for a short period as you do here, and your body will feel it. Your body goes with the flow of life, and does not understand, wanting to die, for it knows it never dies, every cell in your body cooporates in a life affirming venture, together, even at the behest of your thoughts.. You however do not understand that, nor is your thinking clear. And you feel the results of anti-life thinking.

Now, there is much more to your story, as you have lived a pain-filled 17 years. You are the victim of abuse, and you are isolated. You have a fear of your peers as a result, confused, alone, and powerless.

Sternly now, it is theses powerless feelings that you must work on, period.

You need a change of environs, as a physical change will be recouparative and theraputic, you need to use your resources mentally to earn money from where you sit ! Ebay, craigslist, locally for example. Immediately to start moving in ways and thinking in ways to self empower, do you understand?

Now the neglect and abuse needs to be addressed, so instead of self hate, you will learn to express, by empowering you will learn to speak about things you hide, you feel may be taboo, you see. However this is your start for growth and to be able to accept and understand these feelings, and ultimately, release them and move on.

Self empower means you begin to act and speak in ways that feel good to you, to take some charge and approach with determination to get what you seek.

In your talks with your therapist, and with yourself :

"This has happened to me, i need to go deeper and discover more about what im hiding, you are not to tell me what is acceptable to discuss, or i will find someone who will! I am going to heal, i am going to express myself, i am going to live my life as empowered and nothing will stand in my way !

Finally, do not wonder who I am or whether i am credible, or even if you understand my words, read what you will, let your psyche absorb the life-giving, self empowering, constructive, loving nature of these posts. Eat, sleep, breathe the potential that you have for happiness.

Remove yourself and be stubbornly unwilling to accept anything not in your best interest. Remove yourself from the people who strip you of your personal power, you can feel it ! Do not accept it !! Listen !

Suicides have no way out because their terms cannot be met. There is rigid inflexible thought patterns. They simply cannot have the life they want, and at the same time they are powerless because they have been stripped of it (expression) in all manner of trauma.

Work tirelessly in both thought and action, and speech, to empower yourself, by acting solely and selfishly in your best interests.

That is all I have for now. Print out this post an reread it. Bring it to your therapist.

Oh my god.. Thank you so much for that, I cried so much, I read that and I just want to re read it.. Thank you..