NervousNiki
05-23-2014, 09:10 PM
Alright. I can do this. I hope that I am using this forum as it is meant. It has been helpful in a way nothing has when it comes to getting through an attack. I'm not there yet (to the attack) but I'm teetering on the edge. I hope it's not too late to turn back. My intuition tells me to do something. Walk, clean. Something. My brain, fear, and body tell me to stop, rest. My legs are feeling weak. I've got that electric feeling in my body. It feels like its enveloping me. I've a headache in the right lower quadrant of my skull for most of the day. My health anxiety says tumor. The fact they certain movement makes it worse signifies something far less sinister is at work. Tenseness I am sure. Despite being fully aware of how important it is to breathe and to do so deeply, I keep catching myself holding my breath or breathing very shallowly. There is lump in my throat a heaviness in my chest. I feel a slight pressure in my whole head, the back of my head is numb. I feel mostly detached. I hate the detached part. I hate it all, really. I don't understand how this happened to me. How did I become this? I feel completely ripped off and a little pissed off. One day I was cool, I was good. I FELT good. The next day i didn't and I ain't been right since. And now its getting worse. Now every day is a struggle to get through. I don't feel good. Not ever.
My downstairs neighbor, daily, listens to Pink Floyd's The Wall. The soundtrack depicting a man's spiral into into insanity has become own. She is on round three for today.
I am feeling a bit better. The electric feeling is gone, and it didn't get the chance to penetrate my skull. That's when its all over for me. I think with the use of a couple more coping skills I'll be able to get through the rest of this night.
Have a good evening. :)
My downstairs neighbor, daily, listens to Pink Floyd's The Wall. The soundtrack depicting a man's spiral into into insanity has become own. She is on round three for today.
I am feeling a bit better. The electric feeling is gone, and it didn't get the chance to penetrate my skull. That's when its all over for me. I think with the use of a couple more coping skills I'll be able to get through the rest of this night.
Have a good evening. :)