pitt82marino
04-24-2014, 07:56 PM
I'm a 44 year-old male and I've always struggled with anxiety. I feel very socially awkward and have trouble interacting with people sometimes--even with some of my longtime friends, if I haven't seen them in awhile, I feel nervous beforehand or if I randomly run into them (most of them anyway).
My anxiety is most powerful related to work, and that's always been the case regardless of where I've worked. I currently work in a call center and feel overwhelmingly worried/scared/anxious/fearful every day before work, on the drive in, and almost the entire time I'm actually at work. Some days it'll subside after a few hours at work, other days it's crippling pretty much the entire day. My blood pressure is high, my hands will get clammy, my heart will race, my stomach will be very irritable and I'll have pretty much no appetite from the time I wake up until the conclusion of my work day--normally during that 11 hours or so I'll consume a banana and maybe half a sandwich, at most.
Lately it's taken everything I have to even get out of bed, on a day I have to work, and in fact today I called in for the first time (I've only been there a couple months.) because I just couldn't handle the idea of going in and feeling that way. And while I felt guilty calling in, I immediately felt more comfortable and relaxed after I did, knowing I wasn't going to have to face the typical workday.
I've tried deep breathing, meditation, prayer, seeing various counselors, certain mindsets, words of affirmation, you name it.....I've tried pills like Abilify in the past, and currently my dr. has me on Zoloft. I've been on it for about 16 days and while I know it's still early, it's yet to help me in any way. The anxiety/fears/overwhelming sense of general doom haven't gotten any better at all.
My wife is supportive but really doesn't know what to say or do and hates seeing me like this. I feel like joy is just robbed from my life before work, at work.....the only times I'm able to relax are after work or on days off. Life has to be about more than feeling this way--I'm not suicidal or anything but I honestly don't know how much longer I can take feeling these ways and not finding any relief or peace. I'd appreciate any suggestions/well-meaning words of advice.
My anxiety is most powerful related to work, and that's always been the case regardless of where I've worked. I currently work in a call center and feel overwhelmingly worried/scared/anxious/fearful every day before work, on the drive in, and almost the entire time I'm actually at work. Some days it'll subside after a few hours at work, other days it's crippling pretty much the entire day. My blood pressure is high, my hands will get clammy, my heart will race, my stomach will be very irritable and I'll have pretty much no appetite from the time I wake up until the conclusion of my work day--normally during that 11 hours or so I'll consume a banana and maybe half a sandwich, at most.
Lately it's taken everything I have to even get out of bed, on a day I have to work, and in fact today I called in for the first time (I've only been there a couple months.) because I just couldn't handle the idea of going in and feeling that way. And while I felt guilty calling in, I immediately felt more comfortable and relaxed after I did, knowing I wasn't going to have to face the typical workday.
I've tried deep breathing, meditation, prayer, seeing various counselors, certain mindsets, words of affirmation, you name it.....I've tried pills like Abilify in the past, and currently my dr. has me on Zoloft. I've been on it for about 16 days and while I know it's still early, it's yet to help me in any way. The anxiety/fears/overwhelming sense of general doom haven't gotten any better at all.
My wife is supportive but really doesn't know what to say or do and hates seeing me like this. I feel like joy is just robbed from my life before work, at work.....the only times I'm able to relax are after work or on days off. Life has to be about more than feeling this way--I'm not suicidal or anything but I honestly don't know how much longer I can take feeling these ways and not finding any relief or peace. I'd appreciate any suggestions/well-meaning words of advice.