Do I need to see a therapist?

[paulrobert89]

Recently I quit my job. I had received a job promotion at my company that I travelled across the state for. I quit 2 days into it, but have been helping out for 3 weeks or so while they look for my replacement. I suffered what I call really bad panic attacks in which I couldn't really eat or sleep. at one point my heart was hurting really bad. I've lost about 10+ pounds this month which is bad considering how skinny I already am.

It's hard for me to explain all this, but I am something of a perfectionist and my own worst critic. I always tell myself that I'm not good enough. Every little mistake I do at my job, school, etc. I beat myself up over again and again.

I have no job lined up so I will be going back home to my parents unemployed which hurts since I am the guy that was valedictorian of my high school class, as well as being the guy that worked his butt off to graduate early from college.

I don't think that I've ever been truly satisfied or happy with myself. I'm always thinking that everything I do is not good enough even when I have the support of my friends, family or co-workers. My bosses tried their very best to convince me to quit, but I was too embarrassed by my emotions that I just couldn't.

Today for example I found out that I wasn't going to receive any vacation pay from my company because of my resignation. I flipped out and broke down, I yelled at my mom and even made her cry for trying to help. She thinks it's her fault that I'm like this, but it's not.

I doing better now but I wish there is something I could take when my head starts racing, and I can't stop thinking.

All of this anxiety really only comes from work, and in the past school. I at times so much want to be successful and absolutely perfect that I reach a breaking point and can't do it anymore.

[Dahila]

somehow I understand your mom, I think I caused a lot of anxiety for my children. I think you need the help, maybe therapy. Have you look into some medications? Do you have a good doctor, to talk about your problems? Anxiety does not come only from work. Anything can cause a panic attack but it is curable and there are ways to learn how to response better to stress:) Welcome to the forum:)

[Macy2014]

Recently I quit my job. I had received a job promotion at my company that I travelled across the state for. I quit 2 days into it, but have been helping out for 3 weeks or so while they look for my replacement. I suffered what I call really bad panic attacks in which I couldn't really eat or sleep. at one point my heart was hurting really bad. I've lost about 10+ pounds this month which is bad considering how skinny I already am.

It's hard for me to explain all this, but I am something of a perfectionist and my own worst critic. I always tell myself that I'm not good enough. Every little mistake I do at my job, school, etc. I beat myself up over again and again.

I have no job lined up so I will be going back home to my parents unemployed which hurts since I am the guy that was valedictorian of my high school class, as well as being the guy that worked his butt off to graduate early from college.

I don't think that I've ever been truly satisfied or happy with myself. I'm always thinking that everything I do is not good enough even when I have the support of my friends, family or co-workers. My bosses tried their very best to convince me to quit, but I was too embarrassed by my emotions that I just couldn't.

Today for example I found out that I wasn't going to receive any vacation pay from my company because of my resignation. I flipped out and broke down, I yelled at my mom and even made her cry for trying to help. She thinks it's her fault that I'm like this, but it's not.

I doing better now but I wish there is something I could take when my head starts racing, and I can't stop thinking.

All of this anxiety really only comes from work, and in the past school. I at times so much want to be successful and absolutely perfect that I reach a breaking point and can't do it anymore.

Sorry that I can't offer you any helpful advice. I am having problems quite similar to you. I never get professional help but now I think I might need one cause I am struggling through every minute of my life. I think you need to decide for yourself when you need to see a therapist. But meanwhile you have to try to identify what are the negative thoughts that are bothering you the most. When you had the panic attack, what was the thought that caused it. Hope we can share more.

[tony-]

i hope you have come out of your bad patch. Sometimes we just need a break i guess, take some time off get out of town, relax and then perhaps you can decide if therapy is truly needed. thats my $0,02

[Irish Sammie]

Hey Paul,

You're not alone here buddy, I'm the same as you. I too beat myself up over a lot of things, often times feeling that I'm not worthy of things in my life and I self-doubt a lot also. That is actually a trademark characteristic for someone more susceptible to experiencing a panic attack or anxiety disorder. I'm pretty much the epitome of that! I'm a talented designer, but I give myself such a hard time over making sure that everything I do is perfect and that everything with my name on it needs to be of a very high standard. I'm starting to learn that to be a perfectionist is counter productive and in the long run, it is detramental to the progress you might make in life. It's a very hard lesson to learn, don't let me make you think otherwise. You've got to learn to love yourself and be happy with who you are. My mother said something to me last night when I was talking to her about how I was feeling. I see life as a destination. This, is the wrong approach to have. Life infact is a journey to be enjoyed and to be experienced for all it's little quirks and random events.

For so long, I've had this idea of what I wanted to become, putting this huge insurmountable task on a pedestal and aiming for that. This is where a lot of my stress and worry comes from, worried about what other people are going to think of me and analyzing every aspect of my life, overthinking far too much. I'm starting to see all of this now and it is helping. Before you can help yourself, you HAVE to identify and look in on yourself, and figure out where your stress and worry is coming from. Once you have identified what it is, then you can start working on it.

The first two steps you have to take, are 1.) Accept and 2.) Let go. These yet again, are not easy tasks, nor is anything related to bettering yourself of this condition but it's a start, and something I'm already starting to see improvements in myself. The first step is just to allow yourself to accept what is going on with you mentally, and to be ok with that. You're not going crazy, you're not losing your mind, this is all part of the anxiety effect. When you cut yourself, and then touch it, it hurts. You've accepted that it hurts because you cut yourself. With anxiety, it's the same. You're experiencing panic attacks, because you have embedded anxiety over whatever you're experiencing in your life at the moment. The sooner you do that, the sooner you can just acknowledge that it's there, and then to move into the next step.

Then it's about letting go. You have to try an adopt a "I don't care" approach, but at the same time, not to be completely oblivious to what's going on. This is hard, and i'm still battling with this myself, but the more and more you tell yourself something, it will eventually sink in. Humans learn by repetition. Anxiety is a lie. It's not real and it tries to fool you into thinking that there is danger when infact there is not. The process of getting better is re-wiring your thought patterns to accept that what is making you scared, or panicked, is completely ok. There is an element of facing your fears here too.

One thing I do know, is that after this whole process, you'll be a better person, because to rid yourself of what you're experiencing, will mean that you'll need to mend whatever weaknesses you have in order to bolster your confidence with your mind. The stronger you are mentally, the better prepared you'll be to battle this. Don't turn to drink, don't turn to drugs, but eat, sleep and exercise well. These are all important aswell.

If you want someone to talk to, my pm is always welcome :)